boyfriend?!?

[Obsidian]

Hey know those guys that treat you like a sister?

Those are probably afc's who want to fvck you.

Not true. DJ theory says to treat girls like your bratty little sister to make them more attracted to you.

 

[[S]alvatore]

How can you not see that this person is a troll?

 

[Obsidian]

if the person is a troll, the only thing they're accomplishing is wasting a little of our time. The thread isn't harming the fabric of the forum in any way. It's actually a semi-useful discussion.

 

[So pimp its scary]

2_intense : Just so you know, most guys on this site seem to hate women...

Brutal honesty as to why you can't get a bf.

- You claim that you're not ugly and that you only get bad approaches...

How often do you go out to clubs or anything?

Are you approachable? I mean if you are so unnapproachable that the only guys that'll talk to you, aren't the type of guys you want... well, try different venues... most approachable girl is the girl sitting alone in the bookstore reading.

 

[sca_p]

Great posts, Wyldfire!

No, it is not "sex first, relationship later". Don't buy into that sh1t, or that crap about "a man's needs". Respect yourself and your guy by waiting for sex. If he's quality, he'll wait until you're ready. If he "needs" to get off, that's what his right hand is for.

My advice to you on finding a boyfriend:
-Dress nice and feminine (but not slvtty...have some class)
-Get involved in hobbies/things you're interested in--if you join clubs and the like, you might meet a cool guy with similar interests
-Start conversations with strangers while in the grocery store, waiting in line for coffee, etc. It'll boost your confidence and you never know who you'll meet
-Avoid clubs and bars if you're looking for a LTR
-Smile--nobody wants to approach a frumpy girl
-Having opinions is one thing; having an attitude is another. Being cute and respectful about your opinions is cool; being in-your-face and b*tchy isn't.

Remember: it's relationship first, sex later. If the guy's not willing to enter a relationship with potentially no sex or not willing to wait for physical action, next him and look elsewhere.

 

[BlackJackal]

Nobody is saying you are a b1tch. It is your self impossed believe. Actually you are attention whoring through that signature. You want to be a slvt. Nobody here cares if you are or not, nor will you be able to get any attention through these forums. All women are attention *****s, it is a bad quality, and must be disarmed. If you instead dont do this, you will be that much more valuable and wanted by men.



Your attention whoring will probably result in you replying to me with anything but a question. That in turn means you want more of my attetion, which I will not give you.

I know right. Young women tend to makes these kinda statements, like they matter to other people in the real world. No ones thinking about you in the bigger scheme of things sweet heart. If you are pretty but have an attitude like your **** dont stank, then no real man is gonna want to deal with you.

 

[ryannath]

Wlydefire, why would a guy wanna be exclusive with a girl that he has NOT had sex with? And, why would a girl wanna do the same thing? See, that makes no sense. This girl said she wants a bf. Now, how is she gonna get a bf? Oh, I know! Sex! She wants sex. That's one of the reasons she wants a bf. You are giving this girl bad advice when obviously she wants a bf and you are telling her, no you don't have to have sex first to get a commitment, when most of the women in the world are the same way. They go for the sex first, then commitment, just like guys.

Wlydefire, and you also say "If you can't trust a guy to be exclusive with you sexually then you clearly cannot trust him to have been responsible in his past (bad STD risk) or be responsible in the event of an accidental pregnancy." Honestly, if she wants a guy to be sexually exclusive with her, she needs to have sex with him! If she doesn't, there is a good chance the guy will be looking elsewhere for sex, and that means higher STD risk like you said.

 

[TheHumanist]

Ryannath, if you argueing sex is a necessary component to a relation, that is true. At least I hope that you only argueing that...

The thing is, you are aware that you are saying the key to relationship is to open your legs. To be a slut, the very bane of pretty much everyone other member here, at least to what I read. You are saying the only way to keep a man is by sex, if the man is only staying for sex... well that a fine foundation. You are argueing that she must have sex right away if she want to keep a guy. Don't you see the contradiction by what is envisioned of what is the quality girl?

 

[afc_2_dj]

I have NEVER had a boyfriend, so what the hell is wrong with me? or better yet what the hell is wrong with the guys??

The other guys have raised good points, the first thing though I'd ask based on my realizations about women is are you super-picky??

I used to feel bad for women who struggled to find someone, given I'm in the same boat, but have come to realize that very often the women who remain single and complain "there are no good men out there bla bla boohoo" in fact have are single not becuase they don't meet interested men, but becuase they are super picky, expecting only the best-looking, weathiest, etc men to date them, whilst they expect to behave/look/act/etc anyway they please.

 

[KingBeef]

Hey... 2_intense2....i need a pic, i don't know if you're good lookin, average or beefier than wild cattle????

 

[2_intense2]

by the way, there are plenty of unattractive and overweight females who have boyfriends (or in your terms "fat" and "ugly") how do you explain this?
what they have a great personality..??

If I want sex, I can have sex..(trust me this is NOT the problem)

How can you not see that this person is a troll?

um..because I'm NOT..

more about me (meaning my personality and likes or dislikes)
- I'm in college, not a great place to meet guys because my program is basically all females (nursing)
-I have an older brother. so I've seen how he works these girls. So I'm not impressed by a few smooth lines or wtv.
-I love movies ( except for romantic comedies or love stories)
-I think I'm funny, but alot ALOT of people disagree
-I'm easy going

Is this enough information..or you want more?

Hmm...so based on what you are all saying:
-I need to socialize more
-look more feminine
-look more approachable

plus all the othe stuff sca p said..

** you guys are REALLY great at giving advice..**

About the whole you need to have sex to get the guy, thats backwards
I honestly don't know the type of females you are speaking about; one night stands, or wtv. Most girls usually want to feel like there is "something" there, before they have sex. So you need a little ground work before the girl is willing to put out..

 

[2_intense2]

by the way, there are plenty of unattractive and overweight females who have boyfriends (or in your terms "fat" and "ugly") how do you explain this?
what they have a great personality..??

If I want sex, I can have sex..(trust me this is NOT the problem)

How can you not see that this person is a troll?

um..because I'm NOT..

more about me (meaning my personality and likes or dislikes)
- I'm in college, not a great place to meet guys because my program is basically all females (nursing)
-I have an older brother. so I've seen how he works these girls. So I'm not impressed by a few smooth lines or wtv.
-I love movies ( except for romantic comedies or love stories)
-I think I'm funny, but alot ALOT of people disagree
-I'm easy going

Is this enough information..or you want more?

Hmm...so based on what you are all saying:
-I need to socialize more
-look more feminine
-look more approachable

plus all the othe stuff sca p said..

** you guys are REALLY great at giving advice..**

About the whole you need to have sex to get the guy, thats backwards
I honestly don't know the type of females you are speaking about; one night stands, or wtv. Most girls usually want to feel like there is "something" there, before they have sex. So you need a little ground work before the girl is willing to put out..

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

One thing you don't seem to get: it's sex, then boyfriend. You're going to have to have sex with a guy for a bit, then start in on the relationship stuff.

I agree. Not to say that it's right but it's how things seem to be done nowadays.

 

[2_intense2]

are you super-picky??

picky..depends what you mean. Do I have expectations, yea. I mean you gotta know what you want or else your going to settle for anyone.


and by the way the quote at the bottom of my page is CUTE, and is not a representation of myself. (Geez)

 

[Vypros]

First of all, let just just point something out to the guys reading this thread:

what I want is brutal honesty, and who can do that better than guys?

Interesting concept, isn't it? That a female thinks of a GUY when she wants brutal honesty? Something for you all to think about. Girls don't want sugar coated lines and Don Juan behaviour. Girls just want you to be a MAN, and do what MEN do--and that's be strong, have strong convictions, and convey those convictions with strength.

Just a thought for you guys to ponder...

****

Now, on to the thread starter...

I read the whole thread, and it's still hard to pinpoint any one thing you are doing wrong. So rather than do that, I'll say that you need to be a WOMAN.

I spend a lot of time telling the guys here that they need to be MEN and start acting like MEN, but when a girl comes here and wants advice, I will tell her just the opposite. You are a WOMAN, so start acting like one!

First of all, ATTRACTION. That's the crux of any relationship isn't it? Where I would tell a man that his looks don't matter for attraction, I'm telling you that looks matter so greatly that it's RIDICULOUS. Part of being a woman is looking good. This means that if you are overweight, that you change the way you eat (notice I didn't say "go on a diet" because the change has to be PERMANENT), exercise (you really don't want to go to the gym per se, because you don't ahve to build "muscle"), rather you need some cardio (like jogging, walking, etc.) to get your body into shape.

STYLE. You need to analyze the way you are dressing and the make up you wear. Too much make up is a turn off. Instead, you want to wear make up and jewelry that compliment your body (consult a fashion expert for this if you don't already know). The clothes you wear are probably the main thing. If you have a nice body (and you WILL if you get your diet and exercise in place) then you need to show that body off! And by that I don't mean dress "slutty" (because guys don't respect sluts), but you need to dress HOT! Let your pants hug your body just right (not skin tight), and wear cute shirts and jewelry to compliment it. You want to look FEMININE, because that's what guys are looking for--A WOMAN! Accessorize with the right type of purse and you'll be all set on the attraction end. Guys want WOMEN, and and they LOVE femininty, so for the love of God be feminine!

Does that sound sexist? Good, because "sexists" usually know the difference between men and women.

Now, onto other important things. Another major point that is stressed toards guys is to ACT...to APPROACH. It is their job to come to you, not yours to go to them. So let them come to you (and trust me if you get my first piece of advice right, they will come). Just as a guy's job is to APPROACH, your job is to RESPOND!!!

The right responses to the right approaches will drive a guy WILD! Pay attention to the girls who seem to have guys fawning all over them and pay attention to the way they respond. Notice how they are not clingy? Notice how they have "options"? You don't want to give away the farm to a guy right away. You also want to make him work for it. Yes, make him EARN you, for you are the PRIZE!

Yes, guys, she is the prize too. The "I'm the prize" thinking goes both ways and creates a challenge that in turn drives attraction. Don't let a guy disrespect you. Don't call him every three seconds. Don't be bossy, MAKE HIM PICK WHERE YOU GO ON THE DATES!

Also, learn to talk right. Guys get bored when you sit around and prattle about yourself all the time. Guys have something that is your greatest ally as a woman: HIS EGO. If you learn how to stroke his ego, you'll make him go nuts! A girl who asks questions that guys can answer beautifully, will be the prize to any guy.

INTELLIGENCE. Don't get bent on just your looks alone. While they are your number one friend and ally, they aren't EVERYTHING. Most guys want some form of intelligence to their girl. You don't have to be a genious (because in fact, being TOO smart is actually not as attractive to a guy), but knowing a few things here and there and having a career goal will go a long ways.

Spend some time getting inside of yourself and getting the inside right. Figure out what you want to do and where you want to be, and then go for it. A woman who knows what she wants and how to get what she wants is extremely attractive to a guy. So figure out what you want, get your life straightened out from the inside out, and fix your appearance and you'll find that you'll have your pick of guys.

Read up on femininty and being a WOMAN. In fact, read the biography of Eleanor Roosevelt as she is probably the most classic case of feminity and strength wrapped into one I've ever known.

Those are just a few tips for you, without knowing crap about you.

 

[Vypros]

Also, another tidbit of advice:

You are coming to a MALE message board asking GUYS what they want from women. And, in just the same way as a guy asking a girl what she wants in men is going to fall flat, you are going to fall flat by seeking guys advice, because guys do the same thing: They know what they THINK they want, but what they actually want is something different.

So my advice to you is to go down to your local store and pick up some of those famous magazines and start reading them. Get Cosmo and Glamour and Style and whatever else you can find. These magazines are geared towards women figuring out what guys want in much the same way as this message board is geared toward guys figuring out what women want.

 

[djSlvt]

by the way, there are plenty of unattractive and overweight females who have boyfriends (or in your terms "fat" and "ugly") how do you explain this?
what they have a great personality..??

If I want sex, I can have sex..(trust me this is NOT the problem)

There you go, simple lady. What have I said about women being crazy and needing affirmation that they are beautiful. Women will do anything to hear and know that they are beautiful. Women are sometimes pathetic for this, they have low self esteem and are generally very weak creatures.

YOU ARE COMPARING YOURSELF TO PEOPLE WHO YOU THINK ARE INFERIOUR TO YOU. Such as fat and ugly girls. They have a boyfriend, and you dont! Unconsciously you are thinking that you are fatter and uglier. You are in need of proving that wrong, i.e. you need to affirmation that you are beautiful..

To get this you are going to get a boyfriend. Once you have a boyfriend, that means you no longer fatter and uglier than fat and ugly people. You want to keep status quo.



What does a boyfriend means to you? I happen to know exactly what you mean by boyfriend. A boyfriend is not a man that will stick you every night and make you ***. A boyfriend to you is like an equal partner in your life, a 50/50, which will do things for you, buy things for you, and kiss your a55, and if you like the way he kisses your a55 each step of the way you might give him sex.



Is that suppose to make you happy? A boy who you control.




A lover would stick you every night or at least once, he will show you great time, and do things spontaneously to you. He will show you great adventure that you wil enjoy every step of the way.

Perhaps this sounds like something that will make your life fuller and more complete.






There is YOU. . . Then there are things and people that can complete you. Those things and people are not part of YOU, and if you think they can be (you do), then you are on the low value side. You can not respect someone who hasnt learn to respect them selves.


Give those books I told you about a try. They will guide you.









P.S. You can not get sex anytime you want to. You dont want to be a wh0re or a slvt, as that will lower your value even lower than what you are right now. Neither can you fvck anyone even if you keep it secret, it is you who are doing the judging, as well as people around you. If you want sex, you can not have sex, you are single. :kick:

 

[afc_2_dj]

picky..depends what you mean. Do I have expectations, yea. I mean you gotta know what you want or else your going to settle for anyone.

I agree with you there, my point was if your expectations elimiate 99% of the male population maybe you should rethink? Essentially are your expections realistic? I don't chase HB9/10 for example, because they gravitate towards the model-looking metros or bad-ass biker types, and TBH are simply not worth the trouble, but equally I don't take any old skank, or a long term relationship won't work.

by the way, there are plenty of unattractive and overweight females who have boyfriends (or in your terms "fat" and "ugly") how do you explain this?

I noticed this alot lately as well, but very seldom vice-versa [at least in SA], don't know why, except I figure that despite their bad rap, men are less shallow than women, or more willing to be flexible with the expections at least.

 

[Tha Realnezz]

to start off with..I'm female, just to clear the air..

I could go to a female forum, but they sugar coat things. what I want is brutal honesty, and who can do that better than guys?

so here's the deal:
I'am 19 years old and I have NEVER had a boyfriend, so what the hell is wrong with me? or better yet what the hell is wrong with the guys??

Well most guys want a stacked chic,so chances are you probably have no body if guys don't wanna **** you.

Or you're just boring or a b!tch.

I dunno..I would **** a alien if it had Flower Tucci's body so i'm thinking you got a poo-poo body..

 

[lookyoung]

Likewise, any female with an ounce of self respect will NOT have sex with any man who is NOT her boyfriend, fiance' or husband. Sex is not "simple" for a 19 year old teenage girl. Too many guys use girls at that age and it messes them up emotionally for a very long time and can be very traumatic. Sex is actually not "simple" at any age...there are risks of pregnancy and Sexually Transmitted Diseases. If you can't trust a guy to be exclusive with you sexually then you clearly cannot trust him to have been responsible in his past (bad STD risk) or be responsible in the event of an accidental pregnancy.

Women who respect themselves do NOT have sex outside of a relationship/exclusive arrangement...period.

The way your talking is a 19 year old girl should not be having sex period. First of all what kind of guys is A 19 year old going to pull. 19 year old girls date guys between the ages of 19-23 and this is the age men are the most unfaithful to girls.

I know me personally I could not have been a good boyfriend until about 2-3 years ago 27-28 years of age. So what you have to understand is VERY FEW MEN MAKE GOOD HUSBANDS OR BOYFRIENDS AT THAT AGE.


That is why I would always recommend girls especially 19 year old girls to date guys in the 25-29 age group. Less chance of being scarred emotionally, and older men tend to be a little more respectful than 20 year old guys.

That is why is one day when I get married I would advice my daughter to date older men.....