born again bachelor

[Ballie]

I have now calmed down after the roller coaster ride caused by my divorce and thanks to this forum have realised that I am not in a unique situation at all. I am enjoying my single status and have become as they say a "born again bachelor as aptly described in this article:

www.details.com/sex-relationships/dating-and-cheating/200701/meet-the-born-again-bachelor

Being divorced - especially at my age is not a stigma at all in fact this quote sums it up perfectly:

“If you’re single and you’ve never been married at this age, you’re the red-light bachelor,” says Derek (who asked that his real name not be used), 36, an art director in New York who’s been divorced for six years. “Every girl’s looking at you like, ‘What’s wrong with him? Is he gay? Is he crazy?’ Having been married, all that’s wiped away. You’re a single guy,
you’ve already been married, so you’ve already been through the first interview.”

In fact it also gives a very good excuse to not ever get married again - because you don't want to experience the hurt again. That is perfectly exeptable as well. Maybe you single guys should pretend to be divorced as well

 

[azanon]

“If you’re single and you’ve never been married at this age, you’re the red-light bachelor,” says Derek (who asked that his real name not be used), 36, an art director in New York who’s been divorced for six years. “Every girl’s looking at you like, ‘What’s wrong with him? Is he gay? Is he crazy?’ Having been married, all that’s wiped away. You’re a single guy,
you’ve already been married, so you’ve already been through the first interview.”

Only AFCs worry about stuff like that. One could toss out any number of quick excuses to thwart that question, like "just haven't found the right girl for me", or "I've been focusing on career/business/school in my younger years", or any number of other quick excuses that wouldn't scare one off, would divert the topic to something else, and nip all of this in the bud.

In fact it also gives a very good excuse to not ever get married again - because you don't want to experience the hurt again. That is perfectly exeptable as well.

You said that like it is a good thing. Marriage was never the problem; picking the wrong woman was.

Nothing will inhibit personal success and power more than having a general habit of blaming other people and other things on your own failures. And nothing will give you more power than believing that you control almost everything in your life. I know for a fact that I do, so unless I'm god, this can also apply to pretty much anyone else.

 

[azanon]

(please delete)

 

[Nutz]

Yup. My ex tried to use a shaming tactic not long ago because I made it clear I never want to get married again and that it's not some scarlet letter she thinks it is, at least not for guys:

A) I've already been married, so it's not like I'm some weirdo that's 30something and never been in a relationship. Being divorced and single is practically NORMAL now.

B) Because I've been married it's almost expected that I wouldn't want to settle down right away and do it all over again. People are understanding that you are wary of marriage, coupled with the growing recognition of how warped our family court laws are. It's like a free pass to enjoy the single life.

 

[KarmaSutra]

Praise Jesus, Mary and Joseph!

Another Brother joins our fold.

Welcome to being Born again.

 

[mrRuckus]

You always just lie that you are divorced or your wife died. Who is gonna know?

 

[KarmaSutra]

You always just lie that you are divorced or your wife died. Who is gonna know?

You'll know. Being a liar isn't worth a piece of pvssy brother.

 

[Mr. Me]

I'm not married because I just haven't found the right stripper yet.

 

[Ballie]

Originally posted by Azanon

You said that like it is a good thing. Marriage was never the problem; picking the wrong woman was.

That is true. Some people do change with time. I also acknowledge my own fault as well by becoming a wussy. But I was in a small town and there was lack of options.

I am not bitter about it at all. I just have been on my own for three years now and I don't need someone with me 24/7. I have become a bachelor again and enjoy the freedom associated with being one.

Let the good times roll!

 

[sodbuster]

Since it's hunting season, I'll be seriously single for the next 6 weeks-won't even notice if a woman is hitting on me. She's got the rest of the year to try[well maybe during the week she stands a chance]

 

[trent81]

Are there any chicks in South Dakota?

 

[zekko]

I have now calmed down after the roller coaster ride caused by my divorce and thanks to this forum have realised that I am not in a unique situation at all. I am enjoying my single status and have become as they say a "born again bachelor

Congratulations, buddy. Enjoy your newfound freedom!

 

[sodbuster]

Well, the pheasant chicks are gown up into hens and roosters now. The women are here,but they'll be here in 6 weeks too.

 

[white sox bill]

I have now calmed down after the roller coaster ride caused by my divorce and thanks to this forum have realised that I am not in a unique situation at all. I am enjoying my single status and have become as they say a "born again bachelor as aptly described in this article:

www.details.com/sex-relationships/dating-and-cheating/200701/meet-the-born-again-bachelor

Being divorced - especially at my age is not a stigma at all in fact this quote sums it up perfectly:



In fact it also gives a very good excuse to not ever get married again - because you don't want to experience the hurt again. That is perfectly exeptable as well. Maybe you single guys should pretend to be divorced as well

I don't agree with the quote in the linked article...I'll be 50 soon and I've always been more than proud to announce my bachlerhood. IMO it speaks volumes..."Challenge" "Smart" "Discriminating" "Player" "Different" "career oreinted, IE $$)" "Secure" "Independant" . Now each woman may view these with different thoughts. And the "Is he crazy?" Please, there are proably more married Men who are Ku Ku than there are single.

 

[MatureDJ]

I've noticed for quite some time that women always ask me why I have not married. It's almost as if they only want a divorced man, since at least he has been able to convince a woman to marry him.

I suppose that in some ways, this is akin to a virgin maiden. Men who meet such a woman figure that she must have a very high bar for a man to jump over before she will become intimate, and thus perhaps not worth the effort.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Ballie,
I liked your thread very much,especially that bit about people changing,whilst the remnants of their adolescent personality are still there they have learned to control it,this is the reason that monogamy rarely works except amongst the culturally restrained and unimaginative...Each woman you have a long term relationship with changes you,sometimes you change her literally and move on.My take on this based on a lot of experience,is that in your own mind you seem to get better and better chicky babes each time,and you are happier with them....With years your confidence in yourself improves,you learn to take advantage of the unexpected.Luck comes in rashes,maybe there is something in the Stars or biorhythms,if you pull a bird one day,then Horace the gypsy was right,you are attractive to girls that day,go and pull another,ring up that number you got a month ago,lay on the charm,this is the moment,it doesn't last...Having said that it's Sodbuster who has got it all sorted out,he is giving the Ladies in his life the supreme gift of his absense...while away belting the bunnies and peasants,he will be sorting life out,plotting new directions,generally putting some perspective on life...I am an Old Sod too and try to get away Pig shooting with my old dog at least once a year.