"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Bootcamp started May1st, Week #1 - Developing / Conveying Confidence
- Thread starter OceanWindRider
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Ever onward
Master Don Juan
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As for me, I'm constantly doing the EC. So I guess I'm doing them at the same time. But I will make it a point this weekend of specifically going out for an hour or two to do just EC.poohead said:
poohead
Senior Don Juan
Ever onward
Master Don Juan
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Just a few minutes ago I went to the building next door to turn in a paper. Afterwards, because Poohead pointed out the lack of EC exercises so far, I took a 10 minute stroll around campus. I got plent of EC. Did a few "EC face-offs" to outlast people who gave me the Eye Contact. Since I've done Bootcamp a few times I figured this would be second nature by now. But it is funny, I still found my self "flinching" or looking away just as an instant reaction. I will continue to work on it. Props to Poohead for pointing this out for me.
Continuing on my stroll, I got 6 more hi's in to HBs and a few to non-HBs. I got a hi out of all 6 for those who are afraid of not getting a response. I noticed something when I was getting the hi's, on some of them the reaction I was getting was cold. The girls I said hi to would be returning the greeting, but almost out of reflex. That messed with my confidence a little bit.
But then there was this one Hi to a petite blonde girl. She was walking towards me and almost past me but I still blurted out "hi". She of course returned the greeting but was now clearly behind me. That one made me crack up! From that point on I was smiling to myself and was on the verge of laughing all the way back to the library. When I was in such a "good mood" I got 4 more hi's and the responses were way better. I think the lesson to be learned here is that sure, you can be "robotic" in forcing your hi's out there but you will get a much better response if you put off a positive vibe. Get yourself in a good mood before you go out and do the exercises.
Hi count: 8
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Ever onward
Master Don Juan
- Joined
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- 968
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OceanWindRider
Don Juan
are you guys doing ECs?
If ECs are a way of life for you or if you go out and do 10 EC very fast and with no problem - only then you can skip EC assignment.
In all other cases - do EC assignment first. Once you done, you will still be doing EC during your saying Hi.
As for Hi's assignment, the goal is:
1. To be friendly
2. Stop caring about what other people think
That leads to confidence.
So as long as we say it loud enough to hear - we don't care about the other people reaction. Of course, it's better if they say a friendly Hi back.
But that's not the point.
When I am doing Hi, it was rare I can catch EC with people - everyone is too busy. So I just say Hi anyway. Sometimes people are shocked. It just cracks me up and I laugh. It's funny how people live in their matrix and when something unexpected happens they don't know what to do
So I am just having fun with it.
When I am laughing about it - the next Hi's go faster and smoother - cause I don't care about their reaction or what they are gonna think.
Does it make sense to you guys?
OceanWindRider
Don Juan
Here is what I found in the malls.
I can't get Eye contacts. Almost 0. All people stare at the shop windows.
So now I just don't wait for the perfect opportunity or for an eye contact and say Hi anyway!
I also saying Hi's to girls only and the ones I find cute. HB5 and up.
Ever onward
Master Don Juan
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As for the people not giving you EC at the mall....hmmm...well if my surge of confidence keeps up....I might just stop them and get right in their face and force EC with them. All in a playful way of course. I'm having a blast!"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
That is the exact attitude we are looking for!
I've passed and held EC with about 1000 people today, I don't know
. It's a national holiday here so there was a lot of people on the streets. So EC is not a problem for me, however saying 'Hi' is just a steel wall for me, it's f***ing hard!. It's probably easier to get laid than to say 'Hi' for me . I feel like I'm in a shell and can't communicate with people, I feel like writing a poem about it or something... I hate this introversion... The good thing is that the more I have failures the more energy I have to do this more. I want to keep trying until I complete this excercise or I suffocate! The point of this task is really to make it a habit to break out of your character and start making a new friendly social one. 8 weeks is not long enough to build skills with women but it is enough to learn how to break out of the comfort zone, how to conquer and demolish consistently all comfort zones that will arise in your life.
Napolean Hill "Think & grow rich"
My current count of Hi's:
5/50
The times when I do the hello is when I'm either being playful, treating it like a game, or not thinking at all, reacting on impulse.
The times when I don't say it I'm thinking too much. The paradox is that it can be positive stuff like "do it! DO IT DO IT!". But that is too much thinking for me and I don't do it
.Anyone want to analyze how they break the ice and say 'Hi'?
PrEcIsIoN22
Don Juan
Hi/EC count 0/50
PrEcIsIoN22
Don Juan
Guess I musta misread the instructions/rules. Guess with the EC the Hi's should come naturally.Bourne said:
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
thefonz
Master Don Juan
WOW, I feel sooo ****in high right now. My confidence is skyrocketed cus I just went to the mall and said hi to 13 people. That may not seem like much to alot of you but I've been suffering from alot of Social Anxiety these past few years and I was considering going to the doctor to get meds. But the way I just got into those hi's was unbelievable from begining to end. It's like I tapped into a part of myelf I haven't in ages, I was just careless of the response I was gonna get, careless as to what state of mind anyone else was in......after the first 5 hi's (many of them ignored me) I just stopped caring and the numbers just rang up. I was alert, I was completely in the zone and I would have gotten 50 had more people looked at me. I exuded confidence on a whole other level. Wow, this bootcamp **** is amazing, seriously EVERYONE should do this once in their life. I walked in nervous, but PUMPED to do this and I just began by nervously saying hi to some girls and they flat out ignored me. BUt by the end I started saying hi to people who weren't even looking at me, I saw girls walking on the other sides of the store and I shouted, "Hey, what's up" with a smile and they reciprocated. HAHA. I love this site. (I wish I haden't left soo early, I walked around the entire mall twice.....oh well, tomorrow's another day).
Total count: 23/50
johnmich
Senior Don Juan
poohead
Senior Don Juan
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.