Body Language (Non-Communication language)

[SeymourCake]

I learned in university recently that communication largely relies on nonverbal cues. This is probably why a lot of people who spend a lot of time online or playing videogames have a hard time socializing/dating in real life, because they mostly have experience with communicating with people online and not real life where these cues are present.


Body language, tone of voice, eye contact, and facial expression relay a whopping 93% of the message you are trying to say. ALSO, if your verbal message is not congruent with your nonverbal message, the person is more likely to believe your nonverbal message rather than your verbal one.

ie, you ask a girl out, she's not really paying attention, shrugs and says "sure."
ie) you ask a girl out, she's actively listening to what you're saying, she looks you in the eyes, smiles and says "sure."

exact same verbal message, totally different nonverbal message. a pretty obvious example, but things like this happen every day.

I dunno if this helps anyone with anything, but if you try to be aware of the message you're sending to somebody nonverbally it could be really helpful in your social endeavors.

I already knew about this before I took this class, but I hated when people told me that it didn't matter. It does matter, apparently a lot. so get with it bros

 

[yuppaz]

Most new guys don't know this.... but what you really should be doing when learning to be a big pimpin playa is to learn to read between the lines (aka read body language and learn STRONG body language yourself). I can have on the surface completely normal conversations where the undertone of the conversation flat out is me saying "let's f*ck now, let's f*ck now" which gets girls very turned on *where you wanna be* - hiding in plain site.

It has everything to do with how you move, the way you look at her, and the way you talk to her (the undercurrent....not the actual words that are being used...those are somewhat meaningless).

Try this once:
Talk to a girl you find attractive while imagining her giving you awesome head or where you are just about to put it in her...... try it and tell me that it doesn't make a HUGE impact on the interaction...I f*ckin dare you

 

[Stagger Lee]

I believe that body language, facial expressions and cues and how your voice sounds plus your fundamental physical looks (which I categorize all together as appearance) is over 90 percent responsible for your results. Your actual words and tactics is a very small factor.

The only problem is it can be sort of hard to improve on deficient body language. It's mostly controlled subconciously and trying to consciously alter it can be appear strained or unnatural. Probably changing your mood into a more positive, confident one and your nonverbals and body language should hopefully mprove and follow suit. Naturals who attract a lot of women are just good looking guys who naturally and subconciously have good body language.

 

[Deep Dish]

SeymourCake:
This is probably why a lot of people who spend a lot of time online or playing video games have a hard time socializing/dating in real life, because they mostly have experience with communicating with people online and not real life where these cues are present.

It’s a chicken or the egg. People with inadequate or maladaptive social behaviors will naturally seek out and gravitate towards online or video games, the proverbial moth drawn to a flame.

Body language, tone of voice, eye contact, and facial expression relay a whopping 93% of the message you are trying to say. ALSO, if your verbal message is not congruent with your nonverbal message, the person is more likely to believe your nonverbal message rather than your verbal one.

It’s 70-90% nonverbal when someone is suspicious of you, but only 30% nonverbal when you have congruency.