"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Body Language Challenge

Atom Smasher

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I've also stumbled upon a good little trick. Any time I accomplish something or obtain a victory, I curve both my index fingers in to the cleft between that finger and the thumb, on both hands. Kind of like the "OK" sign but with the tips of the index fingers all the way down to where the thumb meets the hand.

I reinforce this constantly... after a workout, after accomplishing a business goal, after doing anything positive. I also stand up straight when I do this.

Then, when I catch myself faltering in any way or am in an unfamiliar situation, I do that thing with my hands, stand up straight, and I'm able to draw upon all those past successes. It causes me to naturally carry myself in a confident manner.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Atom Smasher

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I would say about a week, but the strength of it builds and builds over your entire lifetime.
 

dustmuffin

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I work on this type of body language daily. I even make eye contact and keep it with the cops that work with me. It makes them antsy.

Anyway....practice these behaviors and your confidence will improve. One of the easiest things to do.
 

JohnChops

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No more keyboard jockeying . Action is the place.
Quick, twitchy movements projects weakness and dependence on outside forces. It makes a man look reactive.

That's why a man should move deliberately and walk deliberately. Cause people to WAIT for you. Never look immediately if someone calls your name. If you have a habit of moving your head around to be expressive as you talk you need to cut that out. That is so gay looking it makes me cringe to even think about a man doing this.

The key is this: Project yourself as a man who is MASTER of both time and space. You own time and space.

Regarding being master of space, take up lots of it when you sit down. Take out your keys and your phone and place them around you in a wider radius than necessary. If sitting in tight quarters with men be the guy who doesn't scrunch up and make himself smaller, even if that means rubbing legs with the others until they withdraw. It feels unimaginably uncomfortable, but it's even worse for the other guys and they will scrunch themselves up.

Neil, I must respectfully disagree about playing with hair. I find that to be a huge IOI. It's subconscious primping to make sure she looks alright and also to reassure herself because she's self-conscious about how she's coming across. Ditto with flipping the head to flip her hair back. That's a total tell of insecurity.

A lot of these are Body Language 101 but it's good to review the basics once in a while.

Master of time and space you are...
playing with hair is a huge one. that needs to be ingrained in everyones head
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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bigneil

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Neil, I must respectfully disagree about playing with hair. I find that to be a huge IOI. It's subconscious primping to make sure she looks alright and also to reassure herself because she's self-conscious about how she's coming across.
This is true, but mainly if she is observing you for the first time. Subsequent "primping" after her first observing you (same for fixing her clothes) is an essential sign. Flat line pulse means no interest.
 
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