"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Body fat / ABs question

Sexual

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 13, 2004
Messages
729
Reaction score
4
I've been working out since I was 14 about, and maybe doing sit ups even before that. My shoulders are enormous which already makes my chest look smaller, but unless I have a significant amount of body fat, my abs will tend to stick out just as far if not further than my chest.

Given my white boy metabolism and genetics, the first place that body fat goes on me is to my belly; likewise, it seems to be the last place for it to be removed in a cutting phase.

Should I back down on too many sit ups and leg lifts and take off a few sets to just maintain? Or is it literally impossible for your abdominals to become larger than your pecs?

This was in my last cutting phase almost a year ago and shows exactly what I mean.
http://photos-b.ak.facebook.com/photos-ak-sf2p/v135/133/122/810040471/n810040471_1371069_7872.jpg
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Sexual

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 13, 2004
Messages
729
Reaction score
4
I'm gonna bump this again. Any information about ab growth related to overall growth would be awesome. Thanks.
 

Chase12

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 3, 2006
Messages
107
Reaction score
0
I dont know much about bodybuilding but i would try to cut some bodyfat it looks like u got some gut mixed with abs...

the gut is the last thing to go anyways.. when losing fat
 

Fuglydude

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 13, 2006
Messages
1,541
Reaction score
50
Location
Alberta, Canada
The pic is pretty unclear, but from what i can see you have great shape...your shoulders are great and looks like you're pretty lean too. If you cut down more bodyfat and continue working your abs, you'll get thick separated abs that most guys kill for.

Great job so far.
 

EFFORT

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 17, 2003
Messages
2,115
Reaction score
45
Location
USA
yeah the pic is sort of tough, you might be a bit nit picky or maybe i just don't really see what your talking about.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Sexual

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 13, 2004
Messages
729
Reaction score
4
The more cardio I put in to lose the fat, the more I shrink! I've gone from 215 to like 198 and my abs are still not fully in. My diet is very descent, like the only fast food I ever fit in the occassionally subway chicken on wheat, and I've been staying on 5 small meals of all the right stuff. I was 210 in that picture and I dunno man I'm losing too much muscle.

Cutting sucks!! Maybe I should get to like 230-40 before I even think about cutting up. Let me tell you though man, wearing tight shirts is out when most of my fat is located on my belly.
 

SAFC

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 18, 2007
Messages
52
Reaction score
0
Location
Leeds, UK
Sexual said:
The more cardio I put in to lose the fat, the more I shrink! I've gone from 215 to like 198 and my abs are still not fully in. My diet is very descent, like the only fast food I ever fit in the occassionally subway chicken on wheat, and I've been staying on 5 small meals of all the right stuff. I was 210 in that picture and I dunno man I'm losing too much muscle.

Cutting sucks!! Maybe I should get to like 230-40 before I even think about cutting up. Let me tell you though man, wearing tight shirts is out when most of my fat is located on my belly.
Like the others have said, the pic isn't very clear. However, from what I can see, you look in excellent shape there, mate. Maybe you're being a bit critical of yourself. It's true what they say, nobody cares more about you, than yourself. You think you have a belly, I think you're in very good condition.
 

EFFORT

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 17, 2003
Messages
2,115
Reaction score
45
Location
USA
cutting diet usually lose you muscle. Do a timed carb diet or anabolic diet to keep body fat down and maintain muscle or even add more.
 

Nip/Tuck

Banned
Joined
Nov 27, 2007
Messages
256
Reaction score
2
Sexual said:
The more cardio I put in to lose the fat, the more I shrink! I've gone from 215 to like 198 and my abs are still not fully in. My diet is very descent, like the only fast food I ever fit in the occassionally subway chicken on wheat, and I've been staying on 5 small meals of all the right stuff. I was 210 in that picture and I dunno man I'm losing too much muscle.

Cutting sucks!! Maybe I should get to like 230-40 before I even think about cutting up. Let me tell you though man, wearing tight shirts is out when most of my fat is located on my belly.
Cut off carbs around 6 and stop doing high intensity cardio. Doing walking for 20-30 min on the off days are enough. Cut off all junk food, it's called junk food for a reason. I was in your situation, I was around 195 but had pretty high body fat 12-15% so my abs was partially visible. I changed my diet completely, cut out almost all sugar expect protein shakes and gum. Then I added cardio after working out. Within a week I saw a difference! 6 meals a day and high protein will ensure you don't lose muscle. Make sure you get enough sleep too. (8-9 hours)
 

Mad Manic

Banned
Joined
Aug 11, 2007
Messages
1,038
Reaction score
7
Location
Leeds, UK
I think you just have thick abs with some fat on top. Continue cutting and you'll see what they look like. Good physique btw. :)

MM
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Nip/Tuck

Banned
Joined
Nov 27, 2007
Messages
256
Reaction score
2
Mad Manic said:
I think you just have thick abs with some fat on top. Continue cutting and you'll see what they look like. Good physique btw. :)

MM
It's all body fat! Seriously I was delusional till I changed my diet. I'm pretty sure my BF is down to 8-10%. My abs are visible! That said you can't expect to have some when you don't work it out. Abs are only visible when it's low body fat and it's big from working out. Some skinny guys won't have six packs since their ab muscles are tiny and is covered with skin... lol pretty sad.
 

Sexual

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 13, 2004
Messages
729
Reaction score
4
Great responses, thanks everyone.
 

Ricky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 9, 2002
Messages
4,140
Reaction score
899
Age
52
Do crunches, leg lifts, but don't do weighted abs work.

That pic doesn't look bad. very similar to myself in my peak. Most guys would kill for a body like that.
 

Nip/Tuck

Banned
Joined
Nov 27, 2007
Messages
256
Reaction score
2
Ricky said:
Do crunches, leg lifts, but don't do weighted abs work.

That pic doesn't look bad. very similar to myself in my peak. Most guys would kill for a body like that.
What!? Weighted situps are the best for increasing size and shape of the abs. I don't know why people think ab muscles are different than any other muscle. They're the SAME, train them with heavy weight and watch it get bigger. Once it's big enough it will become visible if you have bodyfat in the single digits 5-9%.
 
Top