"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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blog post: Ugly, creepy guys

MatureDJ

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"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Visionist

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That was written by a fat girl.
 

Visionist

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"She" doesn't deny being a dude actually. Just denies being a B!tch or that it's a satire.

So a vantablack pilled dude.

Or just a fat chick who can't lock down a provider.
 

CopperHead

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While I don’t doubt the accuracy of the post content, sometimes the really hardcore ones like this are written by dudes.

“The only thing I need a man for is sex and reproduction.”

Sounds dude-like. Any thoughts?
I didn't read the whole article, but I agree. The whole thing reads like a dude wrote it.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Who Dares Win

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The problem is that we are debating if it was written from a man trolling or a woman being honest cause both could be.
 

zekko

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I think this has been posted on SoSuave before, because I know I've seen it.
Had the same impression then. Looks like it was written by a bitter male. It's a little too on the nose.
 
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