"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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****block or Golden Opportunity?

Cowhead418

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Alright, so I'm currently in high school, and am still a virgin, though this may change soon. I am a Peer Group Leader, which is where me and a co-leader "lead" groups of freshman two days a week, and during the other three we meet with our senior groups (10 people), where we do fun "leadership" activities and plan for our next meetings. Well, our teacher comes 15 minutes late every day, so we usually just chill during that time. We've all become pretty close friends because of it, and now try to hang out together outside of school whenever we can.

Anyway, there's this one girl (lets call her HB 8) who I didn't really think much of at the start of the year because I didn't know her and my first impression of her was weird and annoying. She is the type of girl who giggles a lot and always seems so happy. Well, recently she's really grown on me ever since we first hung out outside of school where she started giving me all sorts of attention and acting weird around me. Now talking to her comes easy, and she giggles madly at almost everything I say. She gets excited and her eyes light up whenever I see her in the hallway. I feel some sort of "electricity" whenever I interact with her that isn't there with other girls.

However, another girl in my senior group who is the girlfriend of one of my friends is almost trying to ruin this for me. I tease her constantly, and she is constantly playfully punching me and intiating long staredowns. We've developed a competitive game where we are constantly trying to make the other feel uncomfortable and awkward. Well, yesterday at the start of Peer Group all of us decided to lay down on the floor with the lights off until the teacher came. I lay next to HB 8 and proceed to flirt with her, and she starts to have one of her giggle sessions. The other girl then says "I sense a lot of sexual tension between you two, as if you both want in each other's pants but are afraid to act." Other people join in and start making comments like "Stop making out" and "Quit fooling around and just have sex already." After this happened whenever I so much as looked at HB 8 or talked to her this girl and others would start snickering and making "cut" gestures (as if "cutting" the tension with a knife). Surprisingly, this did not make me feel very awkward (it normally would), and I noticed that she didn't feel that much more awkward from it either. What I want to know is, how can I use this situation to my advantage? I've only just started getting comfortable with kino, and this Sunday our group is all going to see Saw IV. HB 8 has told me that scary movies are her favorite. I sense a golden opportunity here, and I don't want to blow it.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Cowhead418

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Mayfly said:
Haha, good reply. But seriously, I'm trying to think of a good way to handle this situation. Girls have told me that I'm witty (even one that I don't remember being very witty to), but I want something more than some clever remark. Today when I was teasing her, she said "The tension! I can feel it going up!" And she started initiating lots of kino and stuff. I mean, what would you do in this situation? I know I should escalate and everything, it's just that I've been cool and collected up to this point, but I am now starting to get a little nervous. This is brand new ****ing territory for me.
 

Lord Shinra

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Just dont panic, and escalate it softly. Dont pull a Tonkin resolution, just go at a good pace.

Keep your cool.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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