"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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"Blind" Date

LeMac

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Via myspace, a friend of one of my friends added me, we've talked a bit on AIM, soon on the phone, and we'll be going out to meet up soon.

Her pictures are those annoying type where you can't really get a good, normal view. However, she does appear to at least be decent looking. And...judging by friends and comments I get the idea that she's attractive.

Anyways, I'm thinking we'd go out for lunch. I'm thinking that would be an hour tops, and I could easily get out of further contact if she a) is not good-looking enough and/or b)a *****.

Do you guys have any other possible ideas, or perhaps things to do after lunch in case I do actually like her?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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flexion_

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Regardless of whether you like her or not keep it short for the first date - no rush.

You might consider just coffee like Starbucks so you don't have to deal with food.
 

LeMac

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Originally posted by flexion_
Regardless of whether you like her or not keep it short for the first date - no rush.

You might consider just coffee like Starbucks so you don't have to deal with food.
Ah, what's the reasoning behind a short date (regardless of attraction)?
 

Anomalous

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Quest-ce que ce pas Mac?


Any active activity is great. Mini-golf, ice-skating, walking at the park, swimming, beach, frisby (kino?), the list goes on and on. NEVER GO to the movies on the first date. This is what is expected from a AFC (non-experienced guy). Also you can't talk in the movies. But if you have some mad non-verbal skills, no talking is neccessary.
 

Keeper

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Indeed. But I wouldn't be too active on the 1st date with a girl you havn't met yet. I'm okay with the lunch idea, but I would just to tea. 1st off, you two should talk a little and get to know each other and get comfortable around each other.

Once that's established, so for an action date.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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flexion_

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Seeing its a blind date your goal should be simply to meet this person and decide if she is worth your time for a real date.

A blind date isn't the same as the real thing - you both aren't meeting because you like each other - you both are just being put in a situation where you can meet each other for the first time as set up by some external person or source.
 
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