bit of a problem.

[Swede54]

I can tell ive been coming off needy to msot chicks. I ask them to hang out alot, and message them alot on the net and stuff. Its partially just from my own boredom. I need to make friends to kinda kill that boredom i think. But i still come off as to needy to chicks i think. I feel like i force alot of things i say. ANd i talk to much and give them to much attention. What can i do to cut back on this, seems wierd.

 

[Grey Fox]

Perhaps shifting your focus from making them happy to being happy with yourself first. If you are having a good time certainly those around you will too. If you focus on pleasing others it actually creates tension and makes things rather unpleasant. Look at it this way if you fawn over someone looking for signs of approval or disproval it puts them in an odd spot. On the one hand its a turn off because you seem so helpless and insecure, but also it makes it hard on them to let you down because they are afraid of crushing you. So they either give you one sympathy date and run or shut you down cold before you can work up the nerve to ask.

A few things that can help to take the tension of you as well as make your social interactions easier.

*Get a hobby, it can help kill boredom and channel and focus your emotions.
*You don't have to talk for the sake of talking. Remember that, and when you do speak shoot for substance and not ways to fill time.
*You will learn by doing, go on dates and don't be afraid to blow it so long as you learn from it.

-Grey Fox

 

[Swede54]

bump

 

[The Rake]

Formulas for ridding neediness:

- You don't need women (yes, you want them but not need them)
- Set goals for your life and strive earnestly to fulfill them
- Work out at your local gym to keep in tip top shape
- Deal with your insecurities by seeking therapeutic help
- Take a public speaking course (Dale Carnegie) to boost your self confidence
- Hang out more with your male buddies
- Talk to more and more females each day to improve your interaction with the fairer se*
- Tell yourself that you are a worthy person that women would love to get to know
- You're the prize, not women
- You have every right to be happy just like the HB9s out there
- You're as worthy as any male
- Let women chase you