Big City Game

[Colossus]

As much as I love good discussion, there is a poignant lack of good old game threads in the MM section. Good game is, after all, the distinction of a Don Juan.

I recently moved to a major city (Boston), and I am amazed at the difference in the game in general and my success with women.

I went to a small state U. in NH, and for three years I saw the same girls, the same scene, the same 3 bars (yes, 3), and the same general lifestyle. It was a very homogeneous environment, and while I did enjoy some good times and fun hook-ups, it was not the best place for me in social terms. I came to college a little bit older (23), and was already past the "drink yourself sick 5 days a week" mentality that prevailed there.

The opportunities in the city are endless. As any of you who live in the city know, there is a bounty of beautiful, single women to choose from, every day!! The subway, at work, at the bars/clubs--it is a young man's dream. I have realized how natural game really is. Too often we over-analyze and come up with these convoluted schemes to be more successful with women, when it can be so much more intuitive.

There are a few key ingredients:

-Good social skills and an amiable demeanor
-Good physical presentation (stay muscular and in shape, eat well, dress well)
-Good intuition--you have to know when a girl finds you attractive
-Resourcefulness: knowing the right people and the right places; contacts open up huge doors.
-Dont be afraid to say "hi!"


It really is that simple. Of course, good looks can work wonders, but you dont have to be a 10 to pull a 10. There is a major difference between small-town game and big city game, and that should be recognized. I would encourage any younger guy to relocate to a big city if he has the means and the inclination. It's not all a big bucket of gold, but the opportunities with women and career are abundant.

 

[Juando]

Everything you say about big city opportunities is true, but just let me whine for a moment:

I'm in NYC now, to help my mom who just had surgery, so I'm here on a family mission, 3 weeks, end of story.

Not quite. I noticed as soon as I got here that this was a nightmare scenario-
incredibly beautiful women just pouring like out of a faucet, my hormones raging, and my time and availability to game almost non-existent.
My days start early and end late, I spend most of my time with family.
Blah blah whine whine, I'll be going back to the West coast soon, so no big deal. But the sex drive is relentless, so I have approached, on the street and subway, restaurants, stuff I would not normally do back home!

So rationally I know it's all good but decided to add my 2 cents since my situation is so limiting but ultimately no big deal because temporary.

Good dj training, right? I would never have believed it if someone told me, you will be doing cold approaches on the street, in New York.
But now that I've done it (still nerve-wracking), why not? I want to do more.
Believe me (for me) this is quite a challenge.

Sorry if I hijacked your post, man...

 

[Juando]

Colossus, I agree...the cold approach is much easier when you're one of 8 million. Not saying I couldn't do it in a small town, but I moved here after college and then discovered this web site, so it's where I really honed my skills (and continue sharpening them). Women here are often impressed with a cold approach because so often here (and in Boston, I'm sure) people have their blinders on and don't make eye contact, smile, etc. So when a woman gets a surprise from a guy with enough balls to approach her, it makes her day.

Would you say a few more words about your cold approach technique- I'm still working on mine; I did one the other day that was a flop, at a farmers' market- I went up to a girl and she ignored me, did not look at me or even acknowlege my existence. I was unprepared for this level of rejection- I've never gotten anything close to that coldness back home; welcome to the Apple!

Afterwards I thought perhaps I should have done something more flamboyant to get her attention, but yes, so many people have their blinders on and you just have mere seconds before they've disappeared in the crowd.

This morning I went for a walk, it was quiet on the street, and said Gd Morning to folks- the response was quite positive...

 

[edger]

I live in NYC too, and I think it's one of the best places for a single guy.

You sure you're hanging out in the same city as me? Because all I see most of the time in Manhattan on any given Friday/Saturday night, are women with their boyfriends or f*ck buddies, or their male friends. It's been quite a struggle here.

 

[Colossus]

If you can read people and approach in a friendly manner, it doesn't matter where you are.

For example, I've closed 2 numbers from girls on the train platform before. The key is to be able to read if they are approachable.

This really is key. I think there are two types of cold approaches:

-The "boot camp" style, which is more focused on sheer numbers and exposure. This is really just approaching for the sake of it.

-The selective style, which is based on reading women for approachability and signs of interest. This may not yield the sheer volume of contacts, but the results are more successful overall.

Cold approaching is unnatural for me. Ive found my niche in being an opportunist of sorts. I have been approached in bars/clubs here more often than I have done the approaching. Accepting a little flirtation with a so-so girl in a group has often lead me to the hottest one of the bunch. Girls always go out in groups, and it pays to be friendly.