"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Between these two men, who is the mature one and the nice guy?

tesla8520

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Feb 5, 2024
Messages
249
Reaction score
90
1) He usually uses tactics to keep women glued to him. The woman might want something from him, like children, marriage, or living together, and he plays the game by pretending to be uninterested in these requests (which he actually does want), and makes her do all the work to get them.
This carries over into his daily life, even in the smallest things.
(Just for example, she texts her, "It's late, come to dinner," and he doesn't respond even after seeing the message, knowing it will worry her, even though he's actually driving home.)
As mentioned, he uses tactics, and sees outburst and emotional high and lows as a reason to use even more tactics "to win the game," so he won't walk away, even when boundaries are crossed, but rather sees those as challenges.

2) This man, when his woman makes requests, discusses them and follows through.
If the woman asks for children, he might ask if they're currently financially equipped to have one, but then he goes ahead with it.
If the woman asks for something else in the relationship, he accepts or disagrees, but he gets it done.
He doesn't use tactics and if he's disrespected, he points it out, sets a limit, and if it's crossed, he'll walk away.
He guide, in the sense that his focus in life isn't on tactics or the game, but rather on having a direction, goals, and wanting to achieve them, and he's clear about this; he hides nothing.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Travel memoir21

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2020
Messages
2,025
Reaction score
1,151
Age
40
Location
Rio Grande Valley, Texas
No man really goes that straight or a route. We're all a little bit of both in my opinion, but if you want peace of mind, take a lot of the second route and use a little bit of number 1 to spice up the relationship or marriage.
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
16,782
Reaction score
9,997
No man really goes that straight or a route. We're all a little bit of both in my opinion
As are the examples in the OP, IMO. They're both a mix of both. As you point out, that's more like real life.
 

BaronOfHair

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 14, 2024
Messages
5,560
Reaction score
3,037
Age
37
@tesla8520 "...if he's disrespected, he points it out, sets a limit, and if it's crossed, he'll walk away"

He's using tactics, in other words, yet pretending to he's "authentic"
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Top