Better than everyone else.

[Plutoman]

A lack of understanding of social interactions and repetition of certain negative behaviors?

Asperger's is sounding pretty likely.

Again, see a psychologist. Yes, I'm serious about that. You aren't going to find the answers you want here, because the answers you want don't exist. Just see a psychologist. The one I saw would offer a free hour before charging to see whether it was a good fit and whether you would want to go through with it.

 

[zinc4]

I have a very complex situation going on.

I have a very strong character and an unshakable self-confidence. I dress the way i want, do what i want, and have everything my way. I think of friends as short-term support to help you reach whatever you need to get done. However, i know a lot of people and have many friends, but very few of them are girls. When i go out to the club, i dress very formal and better than everyone else. I always wear a suit and a tie, while my friends wear very casual clothing. I know i'm better than everyone. I know where i'm going, what i'm doing, and when i'll get it. Most of my friends don't and i feel they are jealous of me when we go out. They seem to always want to know what i'm doing, why i'm doing it, and everything to it. I take very, very good care of my image and everyone notices when i step into the room. A lot of girls obviously give me looks and smile my way. I love for them to look at me when they think i'm not looking and for me to catch them in the act. Those looks just scream "I think you are incredibly attractive and i want you to approach me" and it maintains my ego at such a high level. I want a woman that can match my high level of confidence and i feel she should i approach me. I also feel that i'm better dressed and it would not look appropriate for the better dressed person to approach. If she doesn't have the confidence to approach me, it shows that she can't handle what i bring. I'm 6 ft 1 and 18, by the way. I also keep myself very, very fit by going religiously to the gym 4 days a week, which simply adds to my already high degree of attraction.

The problem: I find that my friends don't want to come out as much with me now since they think i destroy the vibe. I don't approach girls for the reasons stated above and they don't understand why i would get all dressed up and not approach any girls. Ironically, i also want to approach some girls that i am interested in, but i feel the way i'm dressed and the way i am holds me back from it. Girls look at me so much and the ones that have been confident enough to come up to me tell me that i am so attractive and handsome. Other random girls just tell me that if i looked more approachable, which I've been told i'm not, that i would get girls by the dozen. They ask why i look so arrogant and ****y and why i'm not dancing or moving. Last Saturday, i got 4-5 looks from so many girls and girls just standing in front of me just waiting for me to talk to them, as well as girls dancing behind me. I think its my ego vs letting myself be approached and approaching girls.

Any helpful advice would be greatly appreciated.

Holy crap you are gay as hell man. Obvious narcistic disorder going on if this isn't a troll.....it doesn't matter how good you look if you have this kind of attitude...NO ONE will want to hang out with you, woman or man. Hope you can change yourself.....seriously, quit thinking of yourself as so special...you dress up to go to the nightclub or everywhere you go and you really believe that makes you better??????? a better person????? oh my goodness....this is why everyone should study eastern martial arts or something related to spirituality....you just sound so incredibly empty on the inside.

And your friends don't want to hang with you because you are acting like a major self important douche bag and you are way too serious acting about YOURSELF in general.

 

[Trailboss]

Wow! I can't even read this 18 year old idiots drivel anymore! The arrogant, self-aggrandizing puke makes me laugh too hard! So..you were "taught" that you are better then everyone else? Interesting: a normal person would be "taught" (correctly)that nobody is better than anyone else! Everyone has value and your pathetic attempt to convince everyone that you, rightfully, believe you are better is, well...laughable! The bottom line is: you are terrified of women! You use this "I'm so much better" routine as a thorny crown that let's you keep from having to actually do anything about it and stand by the sidelines complaining that we don't get it!

Bottom line is: your an 18 year old moron who has a lot to learn about people in general, women in specific and your own self more then anything. Good luck "Ronaldo"! I think it's going to be a tough road for you...lol

 

[TheWolfMan]

OP, it doesn't matter if they're looking at you or not, what do looks from girls get you? NOTHING! I'm under the assumption that you believe women are just going to drop their panties because they see some chump in a suit. It's all about the attitude and you do not have it sir. Drop the entitlement bull, and actually approach the women. I've seen guys in jeans and plain t-shirts game decent girls. Copernicus called, you're not the center of the universe.

 

[Ronaldo7]

Does anyone know where i can see this "DJ Bible" and what it is?

 

[Trailboss]

Why dont you know where it is? You are so much better then everyone else and you can't see the link? Guess you are another clueless idiot...not special: just...common.

 

[perseverance]

than I can when it comes to guitar and music in general , that's for sure.

Steady on John Squire. God, what is it with 18 year little cretins filling up this forum with their utter nonsense. You and Ronaldo have a lot in common, you're both Barry Bellends.

 

[Ronaldo7]

What kind of upbringing did you have?

I only empathize with those that i have a use for.

I was born into a very rich family and i have everything i could possibly want. It taught me how the world works. Everyone has a price, you just need to find what it is.

@Trailboss: I'm clearly new to the forum and don't know where anything is.

@Scott: I'm rich. That's all i could care for. Fame and popularity come with the mantle of invading the privacy. I don't have time for that. I don't suck c0ck or get raped. That is a very dull and dumb example. I don't play the guitar or anything to do with music. You clearly didn't read what i wrote either. In my humble opinion, i believe that i am better than everyone else in everything I DO, not what you or anyone else does that i don't do.

@Perseverance: Ronaldo and i do have a lot in common. We both work hard to achieve our goals and strive everyday to become the best and even better than we already do. "If you think you are perfect already, then you will never be".

 

[HalfAddict]

I get it Ronaldo. I dress up, accessorize and clean up before I exit the house, pretty much every time I leave.

I feel the same way as you do in that I feel like the others around me are boorish and lack style. But I digress, dressing up and ensuring you look tip top shouts intent. Dressing like a man, and acting like a man gives off masculine energy which makes both women and the men who lack it uncomfortable which itself is not necessarily a bad thing either.

People will talk **** on you, but they are not necessarily jealous. I feel that those around me who do not know me are quite intimidated. I have had girls I know tell me they feel like they cannot touch me.

But you are not perfect and better than everyone, that thought will get you nowhere. There is always room for improvement.

 

[\O/]

I can do anything i set myself to ALL the way. I don't stop midway or slow down when i reach it. I go full force onto anything, which is why i come off as ****y or arrogant. I simply could care less about others when i'm trying to get what i want. It is a very "in your face" approach. It leaves the other person feeling like " I was trying to say something, but damn i got nothing". I intimidate people into second doubting themselves. Everything YOU THOUGHT you were doing right will be put to the test when you see me. I have the ability to change the world. I have it all. Whatever i do, good or bad, i will be pretty damn successful at it. I will set the standard for all to follow. I have the mind, the body, and the soul. My young years betray all that i bring, which is why i hang out with people that are 5+ years older. Every girl that has talked to me tells me that i am full of myself, ****y, arrogant, but they always mention how driven and determined i am. When i step into a room, it's like i'm flexing when i'm not. I exude everything people could/want to envy. There isn't anything that i DO that i'm not good at. Everything people tell me i can't do, i end up doing it better than them. The scent of success follows me everywhere. I know it is hard to understand when you aren't at my level, but it's a feeling that makes you naturally better than everyone. I don't try to be, it simply shows. However, it does hinder a lot with women, especially approaching them, which is my problem.

Clearly you have an inability to see yourself as the world sees you. Which in itself isn't necessarily a big problem, but you would be much better off with better and more realistic self-insight. People react to you because you stand out, probably in a weird way.

Having said that, the paragraph above (the bolded part), had it been written as positive affirmations in a post about motivation, people would be screaming DJ Bible material...

 

[perseverance]

Are you stupid or what ?

Yes, I thought that was obvious?

 

[floydb25]

Yea.. This sounds more like narcissism than anything else. Full blown NPD, even. Being raised in a rich / spoiled environment is one of the causes. Everything seems to match.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FFgoGtt7wu4

Good thing I was never THIS bad. Actually cared TOO much about other people. Just bragged and was arrogant, mostly. There's definitely way too much "I I I, me me me" going on with this fella.

But there were a few people I knew who were just like this. Painfully shallow, arrogant, boastful, and conceited.. Always seeking attention, feeling entitled, looking down on those deemed not good enough, and going bat**** insane whenever things didn't go their way.. Unbareable to be around, or listen to. Everything was always about THEM. Always bragging, trying to out-do everyone, believing to be better than everyone, getting the best of everything and showing off. Some of the biggest AW's you'll meet. Plus they just used everyone as objects for their own gain.

What's interesting is that they don't do **** for anyone, or give a damn about them, but always expect for help from others - only to throw a ****fit when no one allows themselves to be USED, and treated / disregarded like nothing. They also only associate with those who "understand" them, and are deemed high class, or on their level. Everyone else is a scrub. Not sure if it's a good thing that I was "accepted".

Of course, even those deemed "good enough" are still never good enough in their eyes, and they'll soon turn on them, too. Discarded like nothing, and viewed as irrelevant, all the same. Only a matter of time before their extreme dislike and contempt towards everyone is directed towards them. They don't stick around with, or value ANYBODY. Nobody is ever good enough, and any little quirk is the end of the world. Most people are just used for attention / admiration / sex, or whatever.

Most people I knew like this were neglected / abandoned by their parents at a young age (especially the father) - then admired / spoiled / worshipped by everyone else (mostly of the opposite sex). Worst of both worlds. Men and women were like this.

The fake / shallow / status crowd is full of these people. Never going back to that **** again. :box:

 

[Night-hawk]

Kind of like this, OP.

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=BLPM-P7mNQw

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Rly1ZZ076G8

 

[Groovy]

What is that fight club quote about loosing everything again? I wonder if that can fit into here, somehow.

 

[Ronaldo7]

I get it Ronaldo. I dress up, accessorize and clean up before I exit the house, pretty much every time I leave.

I feel the same way as you do in that I feel like the others around me are boorish and lack style. But I digress, dressing up and ensuring you look tip top shouts intent. Dressing like a man, and acting like a man gives off masculine energy which makes both women and the men who lack it uncomfortable which itself is not necessarily a bad thing either.

People will talk **** on you, but they are not necessarily jealous. I feel that those around me who do not know me are quite intimidated. I have had girls I know tell me they feel like they cannot touch me.

But you are not perfect and better than everyone, that thought will get you nowhere. There is always room for improvement.

If a fat person that went to the gym to get in shape and had the mentality that they were better than everyone else, they would easily accomplish their goal and not desist/quit overall or halfway through. Knowing that you are better than everyone is the key that differentiates the common people from the gems. Most people would never have that thought circulate their minds because of the backlash that would be brought along with it. They would lose friends, get told they are arrogant, and be hated. Life is all about survival of the fittest. The people who show their emotions, or weak tendencies, are the ones that get left behind. However, i'm glad you can see exactly where i come from.

@\O/: I don't care how the world sees me. I only care about how I see myself. If that were something to apply, there would be no such word as "driven" or "determination". I'd rather stand out in whatever way than be some nobody, who gets accepted, in the same crowd as everyone else. It isn't a big problem, others simply make it seem so. I hold no attachment to anyone, which is why i think i would be very successful if i knew how to approach women. Every prominent person, who has had a downfall, is usually down to them holding attachment to something and couldn't let go of it. When you have someone who only cares for himself and holds no attachment to anything, that would be a very intimidating person to compete against in terms of success.

@Scott: Au contraire mon ami, i never said you weren't better than me with women. However, i don't approach them, you do. It's basically like i don't play, so i can't be good or bad. I don't know how to, which was the point of posting this thread ASKING FOR HELP. This thread was meant to be for me to learn/get help in learning to approach women. I simply told a little background about myself and the way i am for a better understanding. False egocentric? I'll gladly be labeled with that if it means becoming the best at what i do. Ronaldo is the best at what he does and for you to compare me to him, even with the "False egocentric", is a greatly compliment. Thank you.

@Floyd: I wasn't neglected by my parents. I was raised by both of them very well. However, i was spoiled and admired by aunts, cousins, and everyone in general. What can i say? Everyone is destined/wants to be a part of me. I back up everything i say though. Your response is a bit harsh to describe too. Is it my fault that i'm simply better? No. It's like expecting an NBA player not to dunk the ball. It's something he knows how to do and will always do it. As much as i try to hide being better, it will always show through words, actions, or thoughts.

 

[zinc4]

Renaldo said, "Everyone has a price." How many times have i seen this in a movie by commonly despised character?

He he also said something like, "I only have empathy for those that i have use for."

You know you sound like a sociopath Renaldo.....i am not trying to be mean here...i am just shocked that you at least don't have enough perception of the way others view you when you talk like this....in that regard, you are way below average...if you say stuff like this around your friends then no wonder they don't want to hang with you! You have a lot of learning to do about people in general....your attitude and perspective of others and how others view you is just god awful....

First of all you should start by trying to have empathy for others....people that you have no use for...why? Because it will make you a better person and much easier to hang out with...will also make you a lot more attractive as a person in general.......

not everyone got lucky enough to grow up rich...or grow up good looking or grow up talented at something or hell grow up with all their limbs and mental functions....just because you grew up in a priveleged situation doesn't make you better than anyone else...it just makes you fortunate....what you accomplish on your own two feet and how you treat others is how you should measure yourself...and not just others that you need for something.....

and also girls looking at you is NO BIG DEAL....i get checked out all the time but closing the deal is another story....i just think it would devastate you if one of these chicks that you deem below yourself rejected you and you hide behind these i am better than them lines...that equals being a coward if true...

and finally, i also for a long time felt like i was better than everyone else.....i still have that thought creeping up from time to time...but i try to kill it...why? because that is letting yourself being controlled by your ego and that is NOT a good thing.....you talk about being strong or better and controlling your emotions, well an even bigger part of truly being strong and bettering yourself is controlling your ego, learning sincere empathy and humility for others and let me tell you it takes a real man to do that...you have a lot of learning to do...you can put on all the fancy expensive stylish suits that you want, but that has zero to do with improving your character or who you really are...

 

[floydb25]

Didn't mean to sound harsh; just what I experienced with similar people - combined with everything you said. It comes out as "real"; not meaning to offend. Though it usually does.

But you said it's not your fault that you are better than everyone else, and that you were spoiled because you're a special snowflake, whom everyone is destined to be part of / wants to admire and worship - which pretty much means it's imbedded in you. That's when its a good chance you're dealing with a disorder. In this case, NPD. You can't get through to someone like this.

But I know what it's like to be hassled and bullied over this kind of stuff, so I'm done.

 

[Ronaldo7]

Well not really, I got approached by 3 girls on last gig mon copain. And all I did was headbanging. Too bad I didn't actually like them, but had fun talking to them.



And no, I simply went into your 'mode' to show you how irritating your personality can be to others. Once again, you distorted the reality. And no, Ronaldo is not the best football player, most likely a faggish guy who spends more time in a beauty salon than girls in my classroom. 3/4 of them commented he got better eyebrows than he does.

Look at Messi or Roonie on the other hand...


Most males will disagree with me, but showing emotions is one of the best thing us humans can do. Really. Now everyone will think and associate on pathetic romantic things in those movies.


But really. Imagine a world where there would be no anger, no sorrow, no happiness, no pain, no sadness, no crying, no yelling, no screaming.


Weird man. I enjoy every moment (even if it is not pleasant sometimes) of my emotions. Whether I am angry, sad, happy I actually like it because I can feel it. When I don't feel nothing I get a feeling that I'm in parallel robotic world and start cracking jokes or sometimes even provoking people for a debate for dynamics. Life is boring without emotions.

And not showing them is a sign of a weakness and insecurity. People who are attracted to emotionless people are usually weak themselves. Simply, they have a need to 'recognition' or think the person needs to be 'unreachable'. Thus women who are attracted to those people are usually themselves trash.


Most healthiest relationships that last for more than 4 years have been the ones between both emotional healthy partners showing their emotions, building trust and exchanging experiences.


**** it man, I'd rather cry my whole life than work like a robot. And yes, I do cry sometimes, alone. Flame me now, I know that's my body's natural response to stress, and it has been proven that 'keeping it inside' is actually damaging to your health and increases chances of developing heart illnesses as well as mental one's. Not that I cry like a girl, but when sh1t goes overdrive.








TL;DR Let's stop feeding this morons ego people. OP read the DJ Bible or go suck a c0ck.

I get approached though. I simply love the attention when they give me looks like " why don't you approach me" or " you are so attractive and i wish you would come talk to me". You have the advantage that you look approachable and not "full of yourself". You can say what you want about Ronaldo, but he has undisputed success. What's wrong with taking care of yourself? You seem like you would neglect grooming yourself. To my understanding, women consider grooming a big part of how a man takes care of himself. Having nice eyebrows isn't anything "gay".

"And not showing them (emotions) is a sign of weakness and insecurity. LOL. Who told you this? Why do you think the people that show emotion are the ones that get bullied? You have it all wrong. If you think crying and letting it all out like you are on Dr. Phil isn't weakness, then i don't know why you are even here. Making fun of you would be too easy because you are too much of an easy target.

On a serious note, please do indicate where i can find the DJ Bible. I am not able to find it.

@Zinc: I have the perception of what others view me as. However, i could care less. They don't want to hang around me for a lot of various reasons. They expect me to thank them when they tell me i look good, haha. I have always told them that i don't need them to tell me that. I already know i look good and that is why i take so much getting ready and everything. My perspective of others and how they view me is the following: I Could Care Less.

"First of all you should start by trying to have empathy for others....people that you have no use for...why? Because it will make you a better person and much easier to hang out with...will also make you a lot more attractive as a person in general......." What does that give me? Nothing. It gives THEM, not me. More attractive as a person in general? You sound like a woman blabbering about how it matters what's on the inside.

I agree on your view that what i achieve on my own 2 feet is what matters. Treat others? How is that an achievement?

I know i'm not the only person that gets checked out. However, i just love the looks they give me. They maintain my ego so high because of the amount of looks and the type of looks given. It gives me that grin that fills me up inside and simply leaves them longing even more for me. This is supported by the amount of girls who have came up to me and inquired why i'm so unapproachable, why i seem so arrogant, why i don't drink, why i'm not dancing, and why do i dress like that. Everyone seems to want to know what i'm doing and why i'm doing it. No woman can figure me out and that's why they always flock to ask questions. Empathy and humility are optional traits to have. They won't make you succeed faster or slower than having other traits. Those 2 traits are easy targets for people to take advantage of and to step on. Maybe you have humility, but i don't think i do. When someone asks me who the best is, i have no problem to pointing to myself and giving myself all the credit. While others might point and give credit to the team, i wouldn't. I don't fake something i don't have. I'm pretty bold and honest. I have a lot of learning to do indeed that will get me to where i want to be. I am who i am and i won't change for anyone. Everyone that meets me understands that there are simply 2 options with me, love me or hate me.

@Floyd: I like how no one has directed their responses to the question this thread was about. You simply zeroed in on my personality and such. I asked for help to approach women, etc. I also asked to see the DJ Bible and i keep getting responses about how i'm this and that.

 

[zinc4]

I get approached though. I simply love the attention when they give me looks like " why don't you approach me" or " you are so attractive and i wish you would come talk to me". You have the advantage that you look approachable and not "full of yourself". You can say what you want about Ronaldo, but he has undisputed success. What's wrong with taking care of yourself? You seem like you would neglect grooming yourself. To my understanding, women consider grooming a big part of how a man takes care of himself. Having nice eyebrows isn't anything "gay".

"And not showing them (emotions) is a sign of weakness and insecurity. LOL. Who told you this? Why do you think the people that show emotion are the ones that get bullied? You have it all wrong. If you think crying and letting it all out like you are on Dr. Phil isn't weakness, then i don't know why you are even here. Making fun of you would be too easy because you are too much of an easy target.

On a serious note, please do indicate where i can find the DJ Bible. I am not able to find it.

@Zinc: I have the perception of what others view me as. However, i could care less. They don't want to hang around me for a lot of various reasons. They expect me to thank them when they tell me i look good, haha. I have always told them that i don't need them to tell me that. I already know i look good and that is why i take so much getting ready and everything. My perspective of others and how they view me is the following: I Could Care Less.

"First of all you should start by trying to have empathy for others....people that you have no use for...why? Because it will make you a better person and much easier to hang out with...will also make you a lot more attractive as a person in general......." What does that give me? Nothing. It gives THEM, not me. More attractive as a person in general? You sound like a woman blabbering about how it matters what's on the inside.

I agree on your view that what i achieve on my own 2 feet is what matters. Treat others? How is that an achievement?

I know i'm not the only person that gets checked out. However, i just love the looks they give me. They maintain my ego so high because of the amount of looks and the type of looks given. It gives me that grin that fills me up inside and simply leaves them longing even more for me. This is supported by the amount of girls who have came up to me and inquired why i'm so unapproachable, why i seem so arrogant, why i don't drink, why i'm not dancing, and why do i dress like that. Everyone seems to want to know what i'm doing and why i'm doing it. No woman can figure me out and that's why they always flock to ask questions. Empathy and humility are optional traits to have. They won't make you succeed faster or slower than having other traits. Those 2 traits are easy targets for people to take advantage of and to step on. Maybe you have humility, but i don't think i do. When someone asks me who the best is, i have no problem to pointing to myself and giving myself all the credit. While others might point and give credit to the team, i wouldn't. I don't fake something i don't have. I'm pretty bold and honest. I have a lot of learning to do indeed that will get me to where i want to be. I am who i am and i won't change for anyone. Everyone that meets me understands that there are simply 2 options with me, love me or hate me.

@Floyd: I like how no one has directed their responses to the question this thread was about. You simply zeroed in on my personality and such. I asked for help to approach women, etc. I also asked to see the DJ Bible and i keep getting responses about how i'm this and that.

Listen to yourself.....me me me me me me.......what does it give me? It is great to give to others and not just to yourself....everyone is connected in some way...and the more you give to others, the more you tend to receive on so many levels...so ironically, your selfishness is takling away from yourself and you can't even see it...

You deeming yourself on a higher pedastel is distancing yourself from everyone... even if a woman finds you beyond desirable, you will never connect with her on a deeper level or with a friend on a deeper level with your current state of being...in short you will be very miserable and lonely no matter how many people are "attracted" to you......your entire line of defense is built around so called weaknesses and strengths but it is very shallow

Also, you even openly state that other people's looks maintain your ego and fill you up inside...but this is an empty sense of who you are and how you feel about yourself and it is controlled/influenced by others....in this case your ego is obviously too big and very fragile because it is controlled/influenced by others...it shouldn't matter if strangers are looking at you or not and what kind of looks they are giving you......i thought only hot looking women seeking attention at nightclubs thought like this...your biggest weakness is your ego...if you can't see this then it will be hard to help you...everything isn't about you

and last...if you can't find the DJ bible on this site..then just type it in to google and you will find post fairly easily..

 

[Ronaldo7]

Listen to yourself.....me me me me me me.......what does it give me? It is great to give to others and not just to yourself....everyone is connected in some way...and the more you give to others, the more you tend to receive on so many levels...so ironically, your selfishness is takling away from yourself and you can't even see it...

You deeming yourself on a higher pedastel is distancing yourself from everyone... even if a woman finds you beyond desirable, you will never connect with her on a deeper level or with a friend on a deeper level with your current state of being...in short you will be very miserable and lonely no matter how many people are "attracted" to you......your entire line of defense is built around so called weaknesses and strengths but it is very shallow

Also, you even openly state that other people's looks maintain your ego and fill you up inside...but this is an empty sense of who you are and how you feel about yourself and it is controlled/influenced by others....in this case your ego is obviously too big and very fragile because it is controlled/influenced by others...it shouldn't matter if strangers are looking at you or not and what kind of looks they are giving you......i thought only hot looking women seeking attention at nightclubs thought like this...your biggest weakness is your ego...if you can't see this then it will be hard to help you...everything isn't about you

and last...if you can't find the DJ bible on this site..then just type it in to google and you will find post fairly easily..

Why would it be great to give to others? I have what i want because i set myself to it. Nothing is being taken away from me. The whole concept of giving to others is to share and such. I don't share. Sharing is a word that sounds to me like handing out freebies for people that won't get it like you did.

I should have mentioned. I am not looking for a relationship. A relationship would mean 2 people and i simply wouldn't care. I'm only down for the night. It's more like a f*ck buddy. Why would i want to connect on a deeper level with a woman? That sounds like a divorced man's worst mistake.

Thank you for directing me to the DJ Bible.

http://www.sosuave.com/bible/bible.htm

http://www.mts.net/~bpony/djbible/

Is it the same one or are they different ones?