"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Beta Words to Ban from your vocabulary!!!!!

Forty0ztoFreedom

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 8, 2008
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I've noticed some truly beta words and phrases in my and most people's vocabulary. I think a list can be useful. I notice I use these at work a lot, for whatever reason. I feel a twinge of disgrace each and every time, and have decided to BAN them completely.

The words/phrases aren't beta in themselves, and obviously can't be banned 100% completely especially when a situation calls for it, but in this context they are ugly and self-loathing and should be 100% avoided.

- Sorry (Used because a mistake or misunderstanding must be your fault EVERY TIME.) "Can you repeat that? Sorry."

- Just (Used to minimize something, as if its going to offend or disturb/disrupt somebody) "I'll just have a Blue Moon"

- Really ("I don't really feel like it" or "I'm not really sure" - another attempt to minimize something so as not to offend the demi-gods known as other human beings)

- "I guess" (should speak for itself)

- "I think . . " (attempt to say something without 100% belief in it, so as not to be held accountable, even if you know you're right! Girl: "lol wasnt ronald reagan president in the 90's?" You:"No, I think it was the 80's.")

- "I think so"/"I don't think so" (b!tch versions of 'Yes' and 'No')

- "Can I . ."/"Mind if I . ." (Acceptable in some cases when you're in someone else's private house/property and are requesting something you aren't paying for. That's common decency. Every other time: BETA)

Any others?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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