"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Best books on humor/being funny?

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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War Against Betaism

Master Don Juan
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I've tried reading a couple of books on being funny and they helped very little, if at all. They all basically say the same thing in a lengthy and unnecessary fashion so I'll try to sum up its most important parts while adding some things from my own personal experience. Humor basically comes down to status. David DeAngelo pointed it out in his ****y and funny program that if a high status male in a given group simply laughs for no reason, everyone within the group starts to smile and wonder what is so funny? Next thing they know they're sort of giggling and they don't know why. Since they follow under him, and he's the one laughing, in their minds they're thinking something has to be funny if the leader is laughing about it. Now if a low status male were to do the same, the others in the group would think he's a dork.

It all comes down to what the DJ bible has been teaching you; voice projection, tone, calmness, etc. Before I knew of all of this stuff, I would think of some artificial funny stories to make up before bedtime to share with my friends. In those moments of silence after a story was told or a short conversation has ended, I would very quickly before someone else says something, tell my story, only to have no one laugh. That's because I rushed it and had a weak voice. Now when I tell my stories, I speak with a confident, deep voice and simply take my time. Whenever someone tries to interrupt me, I simply ignore what they are saying and keep talking. That tells the group that what I'm saying is important.

Also, what a lot of people love doing is exaggerating and/or sugar coating their stories to make it seem more funny. I used to do this a lot when I was younger and it pissed off my cousin because he knew what I was doing. One of my friends does this and guess what? No one really laughs at his stories, even though they're a lot more comical than the stories I have to tell. I realized later on that nothing is funnier than the truth. My exaggerated and sugar coated stories sucked because they weren't funny for that very reason. Just stick with the entire truth, project them with a strong and calm voice and you'll become a funny guy.

For improb I saw a couple of seminars and they really didn't help. What helped me was watching a lot of comedies like Dave Chappelle, Chris Tucker, etc. It helps keeping up with pop culture. Also, the bulk of humor comes from the pain or suffering of others, so don't be afraid to make fun of your friends or other people you completely don't know. Often times when I'm in the car with my friends, I think of something funny to say about the random people in the streets. Just don't do it to the point you piss them off or seem insecure about it.
 

War Against Betaism

Master Don Juan
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I've read that book and it doesn't really help that much with being funny with other people. It helps you become a better comedy writer for stand up and screenplays but in social settings it won't do you a lot of help.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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I still say that the best way to learn humor which is natural and off the cuff is to take improvisation classes. It builds a quick mind and confidence plus social interaction.
 
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