Best approach for inexperienced girls

[vorbis]

Judging by some of the comments in this forum, you would guess that any half decent looking woman over 20 is up for it. Somehow I've managed to go out on dates with two very conservative girls in the past month albeit in different countries (Ireland and US).

In both cases we met for a few drinks. The first was a tall blonde HB8 with a nice figure. She was very chatty and things seemed to be going well. She went to the bathroom during the date and returned showing a bit more cleavage (She was wearing a shirt. Continued chatting about stuff in general.

Kept the conversation on her for the most part. She seemed on occasion to talk an awful lot about her brother. Kinda like the way a girl would talk about an ex she was still hung up on. Anyways she announces at 12 O' Clock that her mother would be collecting her at half past! She's 23! Walked her up to where she was getting collected. She said she had a good time and would like to meet up again. I tried to kiss her and she pulled away. Said she viewed kissing as important and that she had only kissed 6 guys in her life! Tbh that just stunned me and I wasn't really sure what to do or say. Just continued up to the place and said goodnight.

Second date was over here in Boston a very nice HB9. Nice figure, nice face and gorgeous ass. i figured since she's a student in Boston she's probably liberal enough. Conversation is not as flowing as the other date. Turns out she's a republican from Alabama and she says she's very traditional about dating. I got her to buy the third round of drinks. She was surprised. Interestingly, she said she didn't have a problem paying for the drinks but seemed to feel I had acted improperly. I should add that her family certainly sounded a lot wealthier than mine.

She also had to go at about 12 O Clock as there was a leaving party for a friend of hers back in the college dorms. Walked with her out of the bar, got a kiss on the lips and said good night. I had asked her if she wanted to meet up again and she said sure. She seemed kind of distant though and I wouldn't be surprised if she flakes on any future plans. I should add though that at times she asked what to me were unbelievably direct questions. I.e. are you close to your parents? Is there any issues between ye?

So any ideas on what would be a better way to handle situations like the two above? A lot of the DJ material seems aimed at more experienced girls.

 

[vorbis]

any opinions??

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

Don't be so naive in thinking that these girls are inexperienced.

I think you're over-estimating their interest level in you. If girl #1 was truly into you, she would have kissed you. Her excuse for not kissing you was a poor one and I would have laughed at her and sent her on her way.. game over. she lost her chance.

For girl #2, I think her IL is low, even if she did kiss you.

If she were REALLY digging you, I'd assume she would have invited you along to the party or, at least, not have been so distant.

Stop asking girls if they'd like to get together again sometime, while you're still on the date.... You put them in an awkward position and make yourself seem over eager in the process.

Say goodnight and tell them you'll see 'em later.

Call back in a day or two if you feel it's worth it.

 

[vorbis]

thanks for the reply. I've gotta cut out that asking if they want to meet up again stuff. I just kind of said it as we were parting ways but still it does sound needy.

Her excuse for not inviting me to the party was that it would be weird to have a non college guy at it. I can kinda see that point, if I was going to leaving drinks for a work friend and brought along a girl none of them knew, it would be kind of awkward for the girl. Still though i would imagine her IL is low.

I don't think I judged the first girl wrongly. Getting collected by her mother, using the word boys instead of guys, going ugh when she saw 2 people kissing on the pub tv. She seemed to have the sexuality of a 13 yo rather than a 23 yo. Anyways have a possible date for Friday so hope that goes better

 

[JJMcLure]

1) Kissing isn't a big deal. Maybe the timing was bad on the first one, or I would hazard a guess you didn't escalate kino enough throughout the evening to lead up to the kiss. (If you went from no kino to trying to kiss at end of night, that's less likely to work).

2) You need to have a strong frame. It doesn't matter if she wants her drinks bought for her. The reality of the situation, any situation - is how YOU frame it. YOUR REALITY. Anyway what you did is fine.

She went to a party after you, sounds like you were warm up material. You should have gone with her. Rather than getting her drunk and sending her off.

Any crap you hear about "don't kiss on the first date" or "traditional about dating" is fvcking BS. If you fall for that, you are getting sucked into the chick's frame! If you let that happen you lose. It is a kind of test. Chicks want a man to lead them, dominate them and tell them how it is. (Have a strong frame).

The guy who falls for those comments is screened out - the chick knows he would be clingy/lacks experience/isn't confident enough to dominate and lead her.

The guy who ends up fvcking them is the alpha male, who has the CONFIDENCE to ignore those comments and set the agenda himself.