Being too physical on first meet good or bad?

[tryst type]

In the past whenever I'd get physical contact to the point of kissing/groping and sex (depending on the meet) I was always hunted down to hang out again another time.

Now I've been noticing the opposite! If I get that far physically even just making out it seems the girl is way more hesitant to see me again or just completely cold towards me.

I've then experimented and went the route of just being playful and fun with little to no kino and the outcome was I was chased down more for another get together.

What gives? I used to be under the impression that escalating physically was the way to get a girl wanting to see you again.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Tryst,
Under a microscope,every snow flake is different,with such a complex creation as a Woman,you must appreciate you just cannot generalise on how they are going to behave...You need constant practice even then, you can get them wrong...Each encounter must be played by ear
You must also appreciate they are moody bvuggers.....Women are Cyclic,their svexual needs governed by the Moon,In intimate conversation I have been told by normally shy and reserved Ladies that every couple of months,when their natural instincts are overwhelmed by their restless urges, they will go to a Party or Dance with the intention of finding a Man.
On my dancing scene there is a very reserved,even frosty Norwegian Lady.a Court Clerk,very staid,suits and respectability...I know her quite well,and have even given her plants for her Garden...Imagine my surprise last week,when the phone rang at nine in the evening,it was her,after the usual pleasantries,she said "Look Scarra,the real reason I rang is that it's my Birthday today....My Daughter was coming over to enjoy a beautiful Salmon that I bought as a special Birthday treat,but she can't come...I feel very lonely and sad,why not come over for a bite"I was in the middle of doing my Tax return,had drunk the best part of a bottle of Sauternes,so I replied "Oh Annacke Happy Birthday Honey,I would love to drop over,but truth is I am over the limit for driving,and have urgent paper work,maybe we can catch up another evening"then it got interesting,there was tension in her voice as she said"Look Scarra,its my Birthday,I am doing up this Fish in the Norwegian way,I have a lovely bottle of Champagne on ice,please come over...Look I will answer the door in my dressing gown and nothing else...."Hmmm...I thought about it,but having been over the limit once before,I couldn't risk losing my license...I made my apologies,I think she was crying as she just put the phone down....So with the remains of the Bottle and a glass in my hand I trudged up the stairs to my Paperwork...Couldn't help reflecting that if she was just a bit slimmer,it might have been a Night to remember...So always note down their Birthdays and send a Card,same goes for Christmas.

 

[Crissco]

In the past whenever I'd get physical contact to the point of kissing/groping and sex (depending on the meet) I was always hunted down to hang out again another time.

Now I've been noticing the opposite! If I get that far physically even just making out it seems the girl is way more hesitant to see me again or just completely cold towards me.

I've then experimented and went the route of just being playful and fun with little to no kino and the outcome was I was chased down more for another get together.

What gives? I used to be under the impression that escalating physically was the way to get a girl wanting to see you again.

Ive been noticing the exact same thing lately man.

 

[CrimsonPanther]

the problem with being too physical is that even slvtier girls are more prone reject you this way. i am not saying to be a pvssy about it and land in the friendzone either

when we use kino, we basically aim for these things:
- to put the girl in a comfort zone, make them feel closer to us, building rapport and trust
- to build attraction, to show her we mean business, in a non-aggressive way

this means we use any kind of touch we use with our close friends like a high five, a poke on the arm with our elbow etc, and when not too weird, the attraction building kino when you touch the girl on more protected zones, like waist, inner arm, neck...

a good (and overused) way is to casually admire her earrings, while touching them, and with the back of the hand touching the neck also. this way you give her an opportunity to react subtly. if she pull her head away, it is non-aggressive rejection, you can get the point. if she lets you, and even look into your eyes while you are doing it, you are free to escalate.

i'd say one rule on this one. if you think it is weird, SHE will think it is weird. so you must be comfortable with kino to project her the comfort she needs.

but there is no ONE SPECIAL RECIPE FOR ALL sadly.
or luckily because it is more fun like that.
a surefire way to find out is to kino in a non-aggressive way. 2 steps forward, one step back, adjust, repeat.
the key is not to do something that is out of bounds. push the bounds though
as a vague example, touch her accidentally, then casually (when it comes natural not to be a weirdo), for ex. she says something funny you poke her and say she is funny, if she is playful about it, escalate. or when you show her something on the computer, just casually put your hands on her back when explaining something. always give her the opportunity to step back. if she does, wait and retry later. if she doesn't, go in heavier.
or you can both study a conversation piece. lean closer, so your heads are closer. builds rapport.

just don't be weird lol.

these are just examples on how i kino.

 

[Driggs]

It's sure better than not escalating.