"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Being funny

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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E

Eternal

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Posting a question in the Tips forum isn't a good start. Kicking this to Discussion.
 
C

Cloud-uk

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Sure, but its pretty hard to be funny if you're not confident talking to people and with yourself- how are you doing with that?
 
F

Faze

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Are there any specific books or movies or shows any of you would recomend to learn how to be funny? Not movies or books that make me laugh, but those that a little deeper and shows to create humor.
 
B

Big Pappy

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Ah, the best medicine that is laughter.


We can't just snap our fingers, tell you to study a specific book or movie and then you'll be instantly funny.

For now, just steal other comedians jokes. Tell each anecdote as though it actually happened to you. It makes things more believable and when the punch line hits them, they're totally stunned.

If you want to be really funny, it calls for a certain perception of the world. You have to be able to twist the obvious and make a play on words.

Remember the words of Steve Martin:
A comic says funny things. A comedian says things funny.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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