Being Agreeable on Dump

[gettinit]

I have been seeing this girl for a few months. Lots of mixed messages, yet a fun time and wild sex when we did get together. I am a bit more interested in another girl and was getting tired of the nonsense with the no-replies, short answers, date declines without offering another day. You all know the drill. Anyway, I decided to cut her loose and started pecking away at a message that wouldn't burn the bridge, but just close it until further notice. After all, you never know when a dry spell might come along. I didn't get a chance to finish my thoughts and was going to do so later that day. Low and behold, before I could send mine, she sends me a dump text with the typical content.

I replied and started off saying that I was about to finish off and send something similar, agreed that it was for the best and noted that the contents of what I was writing earlier was below. The last line of my previously written text was: " I'm thinking that I might not be the guy for you" followed by: "That's as far as I got and I wish you well with everything as well". It was pretty short overall without any reasons listed.

As expected, no reply. We follow each other on instagram and she is a serial poster of selfies and so on, with one to three posts a day and a rare missed day. From the day that I replied with my agreeable dump text, there have been five posts total in the last thirty days. No selfies, just a couple motivational word things, a local sports team thing and one pic from a concert. I have continued to post as normal, a few here and there and never any selfies.

I wonder if I shook her tree. Honestly, not that I really care, but I think that I may have over pursued, lost my frame and gave her the upper hand, putting me in a semi-orbit situation. Being that she is hot and pretty cool to hang with, the last thing that I think that she expected was me to just walk away with a smile.

I'm curious if anyone seen this sort of reaction or am I reading into this too much? Maybe behind all the smoke, the bridge is still standing?

 

[jaygreenb]

If it's only been a few months and she ended it with you I doubt she is losing any sleep over it. It's not worth the mental energy to figure it out even if it was true.

 

[dude99]

I have been seeing this girl for a few months. Lots of mixed messages, yet a fun time and wild sex when we did get together. I am a bit more interested in another girl and was getting tired of the nonsense with the no-replies, short answers, date declines without offering another day. You all know the drill. Anyway, I decided to cut her loose and started pecking away at a message that wouldn't burn the bridge, but just close it until further notice. After all, you never know when a dry spell might come along. I didn't get a chance to finish my thoughts and was going to do so later that day. Low and behold, before I could send mine, she sends me a dump text with the typical content.

I replied and started off saying that I was about to finish off and send something similar, agreed that it was for the best and noted that the contents of what I was writing earlier was below. The last line of my previously written text was: " I'm thinking that I might not be the guy for you" followed by: "That's as far as I got and I wish you well with everything as well". It was pretty short overall without any reasons listed.

As expected, no reply. We follow each other on instagram and she is a serial poster of selfies and so on, with one to three posts a day and a rare missed day. From the day that I replied with my agreeable dump text, there have been five posts total in the last thirty days. No selfies, just a couple motivational word things, a local sports team thing and one pic from a concert. I have continued to post as normal, a few here and there and never any selfies.

I wonder if I shook her tree. Honestly, not that I really care, but I think that I may have over pursued, lost my frame and gave her the upper hand, putting me in a semi-orbit situation. Being that she is hot and pretty cool to hang with, the last thing that I think that she expected was me to just walk away with a smile.

I'm curious if anyone seen this sort of reaction or am I reading into this too much? Maybe behind all the smoke, the bridge is still standing?

She has been too busy dating the dude she dumped you for, to be posting on social media.

Sorry to be blunt but when a chick dumps you she is already dating the new guy. Just be happy you felt the same way and it didnt blind side you.

Go date other women and stay off her social media.

 

[gettinit]

Please be blunt. This isn't the place for BS. As I said, I don't really care and am dating others. Believe me, I have been blindsided and swore to not let it happen again. I'm not looking for advice here or have high hopes of seeing her again, I'm just curious if anyone else has seen this kind of reaction. Sure, she might be dating a new guy, but that is one of her posting things and I have been the subject. I'm not naive.

 

[AJ84]

From a female perspective:
If a girl dumps you, she isn't interested or has lost interest. That's why she isn't replying to you and is continuing on with her life while you comb her social media looking for clues that you got to her.
The fact that you said she cancelled dates etc without suggesting another time is a crystal clear sign that she was not that into you. When we are into a guy, we don't cancel dates unless something drastic happened or we are forced to stay late for work or something and we ALWAYs suggest another time to meet up.
You didn't shake her tree. Focus on the new girl you were planning on dropping for her anyway, just let it go and move on.

 

[gettinit]

Thanks AJ. That's what I was looking for. It was an odd relationship. I'm not "combing" her social media. I have better things to do. She was just on my instagram feed (no longer). Even with all of the nonsense, once a date was set (not that she never gave an alternative day), it was a good time and the nonsense seemed to go out the window, right down to her pulling KINO on me. Whatever. I was just curious, I am moving on and appreciate the female perspective.

 

[AJ84]

Thanks AJ. That's what I was looking for. It was an odd relationship. I'm not "combing" her social media. I have better things to do. She was just on my instagram feed (no longer). Even with all of the nonsense, once a date was set (not that she never gave an alternative day), it was a good time and the nonsense seemed to go out the window, right down to her pulling KINO on me. Whatever. I was just curious, I am moving on and appreciate the female perspective.

No prob

 

[Glassguy]

Get off her social media. Block or unfollow. She isn't putting in any effort into looking at yours at this point and you need to cut ties.

This chick is already pounding another dude. You should go find new prospects, which will divert your attention to where it needs to be instead of trying to figure this last chick out.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

I had a girl do this to me when I was 15. Or rather, I just stopped talking to her after she talked up hanging out and then never showed face lol. The next 3 days after, I **** you not, she bombed my phone with texts of synonyms for the word ‘horny’ hahaha. I never broke and continued not to respond. She even sent me a pic too (she was flicking me off, but still). After that though, eventually she realized that I was going to budge (even though I can close a couple times, can’t lie) and then got pissed off and to this day still holds a grudge about it. It’s weird too, like she didn’t want to lose her virginity to me for whatever reason, and did it with her boyfriend instead just for the experience before trying to get with me again. I think it was because she didn’t want me to think she didn’t know what she was doing, but once I heard that, I was just like ‘nahhh man, not into that’. Chicks make no ****ing sense dude.