Being a jerk - when to do it?

[guywhoneedshelp]

MY OPINION:

Being a jerk works in the beginning if you do it very lightly. When you first meet a girl, and tease her a little bit, in a friendly way.

But being nice to a girl is the best way to create a loving relationship. Being nice is the only way to make a relationship last. When you are a nice, you make a girl feel good. Making her feel good mentally is the most important thing.

Being too nice is a bad move. But showing care, and moderate amounts of attention is the way to go. Make her feel mentally happy with you.

So attracted her with the charming jerk "I don't care" attitude, and then keep her with the charming loving attitude. Just don't be too nice to the point where she walks all over you.

Agree or disagree?

 

[Cassanova_Child]

generally agree i suppose.... but i would say both charming jerk and charming loving at the same time.... keep her guessing at your personality, never knowing what you're gonna do next. chicks dig it. but def agree on the point on not letting her walk all over you.

 

[Warrior74]

MY OPINION:

Being a jerk works in the beginning if you do it very lightly. When you first meet a girl, and tease her a little bit, in a friendly way.

But being nice to a girl is the best way to create a loving relationship. Being nice is the only way to make a relationship last. When you are a nice, you make a girl feel good. Making her feel good mentally is the most important thing.

Being too nice is a bad move. But showing care, and moderate amounts of attention is the way to go. Make her feel mentally happy with you.

So attracted her with the charming jerk "I don't care" attitude, and then keep her with the charming loving attitude. Just don't be too nice to the point where she walks all over you.

Agree or disagree?

Try it and report back. that's the only way to know for sure.

 

[Groovy]

Be nice, but make sure that your "love!" is conditional!! That's the key of it.

Remember that if you have to be a jerk sometimes, then it's kind of your JOB to be a jerk! A nice guy when being disrespected keeps acting nice. A MAN will step up, and he may even come off as a jerk sometimes, but there's a BIG difference!

So be nice! But don't take no crap.

And the I don't give a crap atitude means: Don't give her approval if she didn't earn it! Being nice doesn't mean giving approval, but more like, treating people with respect and as your equals. It's not showering someone with complements, nor it is always paying 100% attention even if it's not being interresting.

 

[guywhoneedshelp]

Sometimes being a jerk is:

"forgetting" to call but having a good reason for it. (I was in a crazy meeting, worked through my lunch break, you know how it is baby) is a healthy way to build attraction in the relationship while still holding on to your balls)

not being willing to change because of a female demand. (No, I wont stop smoking weed with my friends at night. we do it once in awhile, i did it when you met me, i wont change)

going out with your friends on a day she might of expected to see you, but not made plans to see you. (Sorry me and my buddies decided to go golfing in the morning, we'll probably be done at 3pm. I didn't know you wanted to go to the beach for lunch, we'll do that tomorrow)

^Doing those things once in awhile may be "being a jerk." But I'm telling you, it builds attraction. The love sick puppy dog who is eagerly awaiting her call, ready to see her at 9AM every saturday and sunday, always calling on his lunch break no matter what, that is the guy that a woman begins to walk over and get sick of

Now, don't get me wrong. It is good to:

leave a post it note message on her steering wheel telling how much you love her, making her workday that much better because it got off to a good start.

surprising her with a little text message now and then saying "I just saw a commercial for the ruby tuesdays, it reminded me of the first time we went there. you looked so cute, I was just starting to fall for you. I love you!"

^These are all great things if done in small doses. Don't over do it.

This is my opinion. Feel free to disagree. It is important to be both the jerk and the passionate man. Discuss...

 

[guywhoneedshelp]

Try it and report back. that's the only way to know for sure.

I'll give you an example. This one girl I met last May. I was always a d!ck to her. One time, she wrote a MySpace bulletin saying "check out my new pics". I responded "no one gives a fuk" her response "lol jerkkk...wanna come to the beach tonight? there's gonna be mad ppl there" (I ended up going to the beach, she wasn't even there, and then I met my ex, which we dated for a year, but that's a whole different story.)

Now, I'm still a d!ck. She told me to come to the village to hang out with her, I did. Went there, bought some ice cream, told her "well i really came here for the ice cream" her response "a$$hole" but attraction! ended up banging her that night

Now, here's the thing. I've gotten with her since and then ran out the door while she was sleeping. Not been talking to her at all. She's has invited me on myspace to go to her house tonight. Now tonight, if I get with her again, that's when I'm gonna start being nice to her. That's when I want to make the girl feel good. When a woman feels good you can get so much more from her sexually, but you might have to be a jerk in order to first get the sex. I don't intend on having a relationship with her, but if I did, that's when I'd have to start being nice. Being nice is important for LTR's, not sport-fuking

Discuss...