being a boring person

[Hunterchilla]

well, tonight I spoke to this girl ive been dating and tomorrow im planning on see'ing her and she asked me " what do you want to do" now I havent hooked up with her yet, and she is very prude so I am going to have to take it very slow with her, so on a DATE we have to do other things besides hook up, we have to do actual activities.

I realized just sitting down and staring at my wall that I am a boring person, really with out hooking up with me, and me hooking up with her, the relationship is going to be completely BORING. I mean im not interesting at all, i do jujiitsu, I go to school, I work out alot, go home, go to sleep, look for women, and thats my life.

So i dont really know... what to do lol should i just stop this relationship thing until i get more interesting?

 

[Silverback82]

what exactly is your idea of an interesting guy?

sounds like you got some hobbies and a life

 

[lets_do_this]

What do you expect man? Do you need to be a president, or a hero to be interesting?

I don't think so... Look around you. The cars, the trees... Everything in the environment.

Not everything is about you; the world does not revolve around you.

I have a similar lifestyle as you.

I workout alot; I swim alot. But I also study and work.

What I like to do is, I tease her, and make her do the talking.

Mostly about her.

You don't wanna talk about yourself anyway, dont let her know everything about you right away.

Mystery is key. The less she knows, the better imo. That's how it works for me. Hope this helps.

 

[Delta]

yeah,

from the stuff that comes out in some of these forums, you'd figure that to be a real "man", you do have to be astoundingly interesting every minute of the day.

and any less and they throw a "that's why they call it afc... AVERAGE" at you.

yeah, i'm boring as hell too... and to be honest, i find ALMOST EVERYBODY to be pretty frickin' boring.

most people have to WORK or go to school. most people go home and sleep. tv, internet, books, magazines, friends.... that's about it for most.

you have judo too so that's something.

yeah... i'm trying to figure out what the hell i can do other than what i'm doing to become fabulously interesting without joining the jetset....

if you figure it out, let me know.

delta

p.s. but i believe the advice above is a good step.... keep playing with her emotions. that interplay between the two of you instead of trivial pursuit topics. and hell, hooking up is a pretty good way to spend time....

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

A bore and a prude.. Why bother....

But seriously, what's to gain by going out with a prude if you are a bore? Is she capable of helping you come out of your shell? If anything, she's going to be the way that she already is and that will probably make you retreat even more. Go find yourself a woman with some spunk and become her project.

 

[Scrumtulescence]

As Delta said, I think in the real world it's really difficult to come off as an interesting person through what you do and your lifestyle. Not everybody can live a life conducive to endless adventure stories and whatnot, and not everybody is born with the quick wit and sense of humor of a talkshow host. I think your best bet is to be involved in a lot of "extra-curricular" activities, and read as much as possible on subjects that interest you -- become very knowledgable in areas that fascinate you and that you can talk about.

But yeah, if you find the secret formula for instantly becoming an interesting person, let me know. I suffer from the same problem. In fact it's the one thing that makes me hesitant to approach/get to know girls-- a fear of coming off as boring and uninteresting.

 

[Delta]

hmmmm....

that reminds me... i guess that's why everybody opts for FANTASY as opposed to reality.

as scrum points out, most of us don't have taleworthy lives...

hell, if you're not independently wealthy, that's almost guaranteed because it means that a good chunk of your time is simply spent making a living.... and most jobs (even really good ones) are in the end, just jobs.

------------------------------------------------------

hmmm... so fantasy. as men, we want fantasy. we want the sex goddess with a heart of gold. we aren't super keen on the idea that our woman farts, may not look that great outside of her bra, gets bad breath etc.

we want the fantasy woman who thinks our c0cks taste like vanilla ice cream and who screams 'never stop f#cking me!"... somehow simultaneously.

i guess so do they. but whereas womens' burden is to become the sex goddess of our dreams, our burden is to become prince charming who rides on a white horse and lives in a castle.

this was reminded to me because while i was trying to think about guys who seem to have 'exciting lives' (whatever that means), it almost always turns out that they have pretty dull, normal lives too but they're just bullsh1tting blabbermouths who can put a euphemistic spin on the most mundane thing.

take whatever's good in your life and become enthusiastic about it beyond all proportion?

perhaps.... depressing idea... but then again, so's the prospect of becoming a sex goddess to a pudgy average chick....

delta

 

[diplomatic_lies]

If your life is boring, MAKE it exciting. I have no pity for people who make excuses like "But I'm scared of excitement!", or the dumbest, "I'm too poor to do exciting things!"

An "exciting life" isn't about prancing around the world in a helicopter throwing money at pornstars. It's about taking chances and trying new things. Even a boring job can be exciting.

I have a friend who works in finance (the world's most boring career), yet he makes an adventure out of it - simply because he has that "fun" attitude 99.99% of the world lacks.

 

[Sapiens]

Originally posted by Hunterchilla
well, tonight I spoke to this girl ive been dating and tomorrow im planning on see'ing her and she asked me " what do you want to do" now I havent hooked up with her yet, and she is very prude so I am going to have to take it very slow with her, so on a DATE we have to do other things besides hook up, we have to do actual activities.

I realized just sitting down and staring at my wall that I am a boring person, really with out hooking up with me, and me hooking up with her, the relationship is going to be completely BORING. I mean im not interesting at all, i do jujiitsu, I go to school, I work out alot, go home, go to sleep, look for women, and thats my life.

So i dont really know... what to do lol should i just stop this relationship thing until i get more interesting?

Dude, you are too hard on yourself, lighten up!

Like the above posters said, there is alot going on around you. Make fun of it, you will see how soon you will find humorous the stupidity around you.

-Sapiens

 

[Hunterchilla]

thanks for your replys I appreciate them alot, i guess for me to say that I was feeling down and still im going to try to take the advice and become more of "interested" person because the more your interested the more of a interesting person you are.

 

[Q-Pid]

Like the song says...

Do one thing every day that scares you.

 

[Docs]

Nice quote.

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