"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Behaviour between dates

kmc3

Don Juan
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So I've been quite AFC with a girl and I'm going to change that.

When together i'll try make things really fun and happy and make her orgasm whenever possible :)

Between dates im going to text way less, let her initiate conversation, cut them short and try be less available for her.

Because I'm going from available and chatty to the opposite, should I do it gradually or simply start today?

Also, when we do text, should I just be really happy, funny etc. or indifferent?

Any other hints/tips would be appreciated!

Thanks!
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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GotED?

Master Don Juan
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It is very difficult to 'change' your frame to get it back in control once you have lost your frame to the woman from the beginning, such as you say you were 'AFC' from the start.

If you attempt to establish any frame from a non-AFC approach, she will most likely take it as a diminish level of interest. You can only establish frame in the BEGINNING, and being INDIFFERENT as then she wants to chase you and that places VALUE in her mind on who you are as worthy of her attention. However, since you started in AFC mode, you were the one chasing and any attempt to turn that around is going to be encountered as unacceptable to the woman.

Who wants to accept less candy and still have to dish out the same level of work if it was like that from the start??

Good luck.

With respect,

Exodus
 

Renegade357

Master Don Juan
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It's a balancing act. If you're going to cut back you'll need to do it somewhat gradually or else she'll think something is up. You have to constantly poll her interest level and then gauge how much ice cream you need to give her. Every date has to be treated like it's the first. Good luck!
 

kmc3

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Difficult, but doable?

With all the experience here etc. surely this can be done.

Either way I'm going to try... Just want some tips :)
 

GotED?

Master Don Juan
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Why do you need a change of tactic, OP?

Are things going south and she is losing interest? If it is working from an AFC-mode since the beginning and she still has high interest, why risk changing things? But if she's already losing interest slowly - you will have to establish slow NC (non-contact) and work on yourself (muscles, interests, other women, etc). This will not get rid of your AFC-mode since the start, but it will re-establish her interest somewhat PERHAPS, but once a woman is used to the AFC chasing, it is very difficult to turn it around without a full blown NC after she dumps you and even then it is a small chance.

Good luck.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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sighsigh

Don Juan
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IMO you should be in practically 0 contact with the girl between dates. Ideally the only reason you should ever contact her is to set up the next date.

And no, don't do it 'gradually.' Start immediately. People's mindsets are extremely malleable. Sure she might see it weird at first but I assure you she will adapt very quickly to the new paradigm.
 
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