"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Be great, screw the DJ!!

basbhat

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It seems as if desire and conscience cannot mix on the truest level. You know conscience. That still small voice within that is always right, and you are always(most likely!)ignoring. You know Desire. That ghastly, horrid enigma that always feeds on itself with you as it's medium for expression and propagation. Of course, we are all too eager to only feed the beast. In classical mythology, I guess this situation could be compared to the devil and the angel. You are either on one side or the other, and both sides lead to completely different places. Have you ever tried to completely be one or the other?

I know that when I honestly analyze the path of the DJ, I see major conflict. A DJ is supposedly "a man" who embodies all manly qualities. I do not honestly see this archetype of the DJ fullfilling any "real men" criteria. If being a man is based on strength, then the DJ falls short. What do we call strength, success, and "a man" in our DJ world? We say he has himself together, knows his desires and acts on them, is confident, warm, humorous, takes care of himself, is independent, ad nauseum. Yet what meaning do we attach to all of these qualities? On this site, it all has to do with dealing with women. If a man is this way or that, not only will he be successful, but he will be a man.

I would argue that being a real man involves possessing real perspective in the world in which we live. The ability to understand what is true and based on sound principles, and the ability to live from these principles truly. When I am chasing, trying to hit on, or ivolving myself in any activity where "getting the woman" is the goal, I am acting from desire, the lowly beast. The Feminine yin-the blinding, binding force where no masculinity may tread. It is a dark place with no manly light.

When I am acting from the masculine(truly), the action is freeing, serviceful, loving, etc. The greatest men in History were not DJs. No DJ can even touch someone of the caliber of a Martin Luther King Jr. or Gandhi. A DJ is laughable at best compared to these true men.These MEN had there heads screwed on straight. They possesed great vision and discipline and would not be dragged down by the feminine. Yes, they struggled, but they overcame their weaknesses. They had real game!

A DJ is too shortsighted. These great men of the past(and future, to come) see with the eyes of eternity. Women are not here so that we can become men for them. Women are here to show us how to be a man for ourselves!

Only one who is great or is aspiring to greatness would truly understand what sacrifice is. If one were strong and willing enough to subliminate himself for a greater purpose in life, he could identify. If not, let him be the half man that he is.

We men today are weak. We have our cars, houses, TVs, clothes, and all kinds of useless trash. We trash the world we live in, don't know how to treat each other, have no respect, and lack all dignity. And on top of all of this, we drag some shallow, disrespectful, cancerous, subconsciously needy woman into our lives to only make our life that much more complicated. WTF are we thinking?

We are the reason there are so many crappy women in the world(and vice versa!) We play off of each other. We play to each others weaknesses. In the end, we are left with a bunch of bytchy women and pseudo men living shallow, usless lives devoid of any real meaning. I say be great, screw the DJ!!
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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basbhat

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well, actually he did! and so did MLK...they both have the kids to prove it!
 

Swoop

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You misunderstand what it means to be a DJ. DJ isn't only about getting women if you think that then you need to re-read the DJ Bible. DJ is also about becoming a great person. The level of greatness depends on each individuals. Not everyone will aspire to be the Greatest of all, not possible. And to pursue such greatness to no end is also a form of desire. I disagree that there is conflict from being Great and being DJ.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Tyron

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basbhat I think you probably have missed some very important ideas. Next time don't jump straight to the "pick up lines". cheers
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Ever notice that the guys who don't quite get it tend to write the most elaborate posts of enlightenment that the rest of us don't get it?
 

flexion_

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I need to smoke something before the point of this thread will jump out at me. I hope we all agree that a DJ should be able to make their point in a few sentences.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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basbhat

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Basically, what I was trying to say is that it is really diffucult to align my desire for women with my desire to be a great. I feel a conflict. Maybe it is a personal thing. But why are all the greatest people in history celibate(like great scientists Newton and Tesla) or at least close to it? Personally, I would hate to not have sex.

Maybe it is about balance, I don't know. All I know is that I wrote the post b/c I hate the pull that women can have on me, while at the same time, I would like to be great, and not give up THAT desire for something less. And yeah, I had to smoke plenty of somethin' to get to the point that I could write this post!
 

GuitarOnFire

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Don't act great, become great.

There is a serious difference. You don't need to act like a masculine man if that is what you are. Many idiots are out there that act tough and then are on the floor in pain when they realize they're not that great compared to others.
 

\O/

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Originally posted by basbhat
Basically, what I was trying to say is that it is really diffucult to align my desire for women with my desire to be a great. I feel a conflict. Maybe it is a personal thing. But why are all the greatest people in history celibate(like great scientists Newton and Tesla) or at least close to it? Personally, I would hate to not have sex.

Maybe it is about balance, I don't know. All I know is that I wrote the post b/c I hate the pull that women can have on me, while at the same time, I would like to be great, and not give up THAT desire for something less. And yeah, I had to smoke plenty of somethin' to get to the point that I could write this post!
I don't get what you're saying here. If you become a great person women WILL want you. They will desire you. Where do you see the conflict? Being a great person doesn't mean inventing some important **** or writing elaborate theories on advanced subjects. It's about being great at all aspects of your life. Personality, success etc. You don't have to get into historybooks to be a DJ.

I'd rather get laid plenty and live a great life then to be known as an intelligent scientist with no game.. :cheer:

Maybe I completely missed your point, but I'll press the submit button anyways :p
 

\O/

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Originally posted by thederekeffect1
I guess what I really want to know is... Did Ghandi get laid or not?!
Maybe he didn't get laid, but he definately got screwed!
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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seanchai

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Hey, I noticed from a cursory glance that almost without exception, all the articles in the DJ Bible are about getting women. So I'm curious as to how being a DJ is more than that? Not that I don't admire you guys for wanting to make yourselves into better guys, but I'm just wondering where that came from.
 

uzio

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Newton died a virgin!

DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU.

This public service announcement was brought to you by Uzurpator
 

Jay-X

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Originally posted by thederekeffect1
Ghandi didn't get laid...

actually Gadhi bedded many more women than you can dream of... and he wasn't exactly an attractive guy
 

Swoop

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Originally posted by seanchai
Hey, I noticed from a cursory glance that almost without exception, all the articles in the DJ Bible are about getting women. So I'm curious as to how being a DJ is more than that? Not that I don't admire you guys for wanting to make yourselves into better guys, but I'm just wondering where that came from.
cursory glance isn't enough. You must read the entire thing. Also the very same authors who compose the bible has other materials that elaborate on the subject.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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