"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Battered by the Czech Republic...
- Thread starter L777
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Typical, if you had really played American football, you would know this, and would not claim that it only required brute strength. American football has more options for advancing the ball downfield as opposed to just kicking it, or getting the occasional head on the ball. Our players can avoid the opponent, or run headlong into them. This allows far more strategy to be built into the game than soccer.
I'm guessing the "gridiron" (another clue that you've never played organized American football is your language) you played was in some very unorganized way with the boys from the pub. In Trinidad, maybe, or some dank London back lot, perhaps? This wouldn't even be junior high school level in the U.S.
You're suffering from sports envy, and we can help. The reasoning is simple.
Soccer fans are known to be violent. This is perfectly understandable. If you are saddled with a sport as boring as soccer (A recent World Cup match just was played; the score was 0-0. My, that must have been riveting) your fans must go on the occasional rampage to restore balance to their lives and get some excitement into their otherwise dull existence. God knows your sport doesn't provide it.
Just let us Americanize your football. We would introduce the concept of the "tackle" to the game, and when we're done we guarantee you'd like it much, much better. What MAN wouldn't enjoy the frequent forceful collision as an integral part of the football match? This would sure beat watching smelly guys in shorts and polyester shirts running up and down the field to no end whatsoever, daintily trying to avoid harming each other because that would be a "foul." Unfortunately, that's the sorry state of this worldwide "sport." Your footballers would feel little need to riot, because your Americanized sport would now be far superior to watching paint dry as a form of entertainment.
No need to thank us. Why, it would be just another day's work from the country where the nine sixteenths inch box end wrench originates. Here, the fan of exciting American football can actually feel like something HAPPENED when they go to a sporting event.
Until you have truly sampled what American sports have to offer (maybe we can get a visa for you) I'm afraid you're stuck with what you have, which is a great pity. Perhaps there is some medication (antidepressant or some sort) which can help you ease your pain. My recommendation is to switch to some other sport as soon as possible. The longer you wait, the greater the risks to your mental well being as you age.
Why would anyone want that? The World Cup final garners 1.1 billion people, the last superbowl didn't even muster 0.1 billion, it only got 93 million.johnnyrem said:
The NFL tried to expand with NFL Europe, but that's been a flop.
typical
Master Don Juan
Rugby yea you are chasing the game a lot, but against good teams you can go for a 10 minute non stop attack phase and get tackled numerous times (not just once and end of play), or if they get the upper hand you can literally be down on your line having to make back breaking tackles every few seconds.
In AF you get a good rest after getting a hard tackle in rugby no one cares the balls gone if you don't manage to hold onto it (without conceding a penalty) and recycle it to you team again, one once you do you have to get back up and get into line again for another run, or get back up and run back to make a few tackles cause you lost the ball.
Both games are very very very fun and exciting, I'm just favoring Rugby cause its our game (ya know patriotism and giving you guys a ribbing)
Ive even played Soccer and it isn't as demanding as the other two on the body, but you gotta have tonnes of stamina to be able to run for the whole 90 Min's, cause if you tire out in the last 10 they will hammer in 4 goals, plus ya gotta have respect for players who can curl the ball in from 30-40 yards and get it on target every time.
You see more goals in High school games and what not as the defense of both sides aren't that rock solid and players generally can shoot from anywhere and score. Playing with young boys who are national reps shows you just how skilled these thin little boys are especially when they nutmeg you and leave you standing there looking like a dork.
93 mill? That's less than the US alone my friend, over 800 million people watch the SB. http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/other_sports/us_sport/1794267.stmConsent said:
Not to side with any of you moaning biatches, just making a correction.
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
french dont give a toss about lance armstrong - hes only famous bcoz of his cancer in his ballsNSUballer said:
the most followed sport in the world = football (the real one, not gridiron)
as for someone saying footballs boring and there was a 0-0 draw match...yes, it happens in football, but theres a thing called good defending/good goal keeping, goals dont come as easy as in basketball or NFL but there r plenty of shots
i would rather watch action packed football/rugby then to sit and watch some bunch of tv ads on tv (NFL, baseball, basketball):crazy:
as for olympics, US and china is not that great of sporting nations - look how many ppl u guys have and how many medals u win (number of ppl per medal ratio)
nah its ok...yanks already tried to americanize football in MLS few years back by introducing shoot outs after even score lines and it was awful and even u americans didnt like it.johnnyrem said:
u guys need to learn to relax a bit
lol gettin frustrated becoz of low-scoring games...that tells us how u guys r not patient :rock:
L777
Master Don Juan
typical
Master Don Juan
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Your article is wrong. That is not an actual #, it's what the NFL said it was projected to get (which it didn't).Cash said:
Here is an actual quote from Wikipidea: "There is a popular urban myth regarding the Super Bowl — that the game is watched in 234 countries by 1 billion people [1], a fact unlikely to be true considering the time of the event and the lack of popularity American Football has outside of the United States. While Super Bowl XXXIX in 2005 was available to a potential audience of approximately one billion, i.e. one billion people are in the collective coverage area of the various channels that carried the game, in actual fact it was only watched by 93 million viewers".
The sources for that number are from CNNSI among others. Nobody watches NFL outside America. Basketball and baseball do better globally.
diplomatic_lies
Master Don Juan
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"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
L777
Master Don Juan
as if they will. Theres better teams in the World Cup than brazil, believe me.
NSUballer
Senior Don Juan
chandidas said:as for olympics, US and china is not that great of sporting nations - look how many ppl u guys have and how many medals u win (number of ppl per medal ratio)
Yea China has 2 billion people and the U.S. has less than 300 million and we stilll whip their communist a$$es. Did you know Yao Ming gives some of his salary to the chinese government??