No its not the same. I advocate behavioral communication while you advocate verbal.
I ment the same concept. is to get the word across.. your behavioral communication and my verbal are both after the same concept, is her to straighten out, there isnt one way, theres more way verbally, physical(not a fan of hitting) and the list goes on. i like to be straight up, i like to say whats on my mind rather than keeping it bottled up. sure theres expections. im not going to pin point EVERything she does. but i do have expectations.
Its not as easy as it seems. First you need to know why your girl stepped out of line. Then you need react appropriatley to get the results you want. Punishing her for not knowing the reason will not magically solve the problem but it will resurface (Fvck's sake's I sound like Dr Phil here). It usually all comes down to interest level's and the type of girl she is. High interest level's from your girl with a good head on her shoulders with you being a DJ is the best recipe. Think about it.... if you are a DJ you got tons of girls running after you,,,,,your girl knows you can replace her with in a blink of an eye..... which brings it do the core issue: would you really tolerate bad behaviour and tell her to grow up???!! NO! you just bump her because you got other girls to see who won't give you hard time. THE FEAR OF BEING BUMPED FOR OTHER GIRLS IS THE FEAR THAT WILL INCREASE HER ATTRACTION IN YOU AND WILL ENSURE THAT SHE WON'T DISRESPECT YOU. well your right to some extend. like i said. it depends on the value you put in the disrespect. if a girl flakes on me twice in one month shes gone. if she flaked on me twice in one year then i let it slide, but if she did something very disrespectful, talk sh1t behind my back, or something along the lines that i find really got to me, i would bump her. when ur girl steps out of line, u tell her its unaccepable and it still conitues is it u punish her by taking the attention away to an extend it depends on your tolerlation and HOW much you willing to put up. and the things you'll let her slide. if your doing it on a daily basicly or a few times a month then its obiviously she needs a bump. A Dj mind is great. he doesnt need to tell him or his gf that he can replace her, rather than show the people. you can easily tell a great person. you tell who is confident, you can tell who is a sh1t talker or is a puzzy, its the value your girlfriend puts in you. i rather SHOW my girl that im capable of replacing her and I will. she WILL know that my foot is on the ground, before we start dating. i always make it clear(non verbally) that i dont take sh1t.
So now you are going to use the same tactic they use against us. Any girl tries to use the silence treatment on me will not work because it's purpose is to get arise out of me and make me worry and cave in to her demands (like she is always used to from dating AFC'S). When they see that it doesn't work and I am the same cheerful carefree guy they end up abondening this dreadful tactic. Don't use tactics like that its counterproductive and you would look like a wuss. like you said "Sometimes silence is golden." well it hasnt failed me once. because i use it wisely. A girl never disrespected me bad enough that i had to do MORe than the silence treatment. its all about trial and error. you and me know that. there isnt any rules. no such things. there are things like GUIDELINES but nothing that will get u to a marriage. its all trial and error, what works best for you. personailly i love the silence treatment. its easy and effective. well for LTR that is. not too well for dating.
By giving her ultimatum's and threatening her you just proved to her how little power you have in this relationship. If she flakes on you for a friend then she wasn't that interested in you to begin with and she won't really care if you don't see her again. i wouldnt call it threatening. more of stating the facts. but im talking based on a LTR, maybe you are talking from a different perspective. im talking on based 3+ month relationship. if your girl flaked on u once, you tell her. that u will not accept that kind of sh1t and that shes out the know if she does it again. and if she does it again soon then shes out but if she does it again 8 months down the road im sure u can let it slide. i have little toloreance. thats just me, im a nice guy but NOT to nice, i do have my foot down. im warm blooded at the same time. thats something I personally have to work one. but i developed bigger balls in the last 6 months or i shoulsd say my last ex. which u and me know.
Respect is earned never given. Why the magic number 3? so she is off the hook 2 times but the third time is the big 'no no'?? As I stated before your girl needs to realise that she can be easily replaced with a snap of a finger by another girl and its not done with telling her but with her seeing it with her very own eyes
respect is earned. im not going to deny that. your 100 percent right. i earn my respect by respecting the individual. the the magic number 3? its my guidline. but it varys along with the time frame. like i said if a girl flakes twice in a month shes out no question asked. its all about how much tolerance u'll put up. i just said number 3 for a guidline for guys who have NO balls. maybe i should have explained the 3 with more deapth. my bad on that part.
you right again, my girlfriend WOULd know from the begining that she can be replace. she doesnt need me to tell her, im a great guy. i got lots to offer at the same time I deverse good. **** i dersve perfect. im not clingy, nor incesure(when im not in my afc days) i know personally what i got to offer.
and other ppl see that aswell., i got girls telling me frequenly telling me how good my personailty is and how sexy it is. even my ex told me i had the best personality she known. thats ME. i dont need to tell people that.
thanks for the conversation Djdamage, your one the memebers on here that i place a much higher value of respect then the average. you taught me lots with your post man, props, i look up to you
I ment the same concept. is to get the word across.. your behavioral communication and my verbal are both after the same concept, is her to straighten out, there isnt one way, theres more way verbally, physical(not a fan of hitting) and the list goes on. i like to be straight up, i like to say whats on my mind rather than keeping it bottled up. sure theres expections. im not going to pin point EVERything she does. but i do have expectations.
Its not as easy as it seems. First you need to know why your girl stepped out of line. Then you need react appropriatley to get the results you want. Punishing her for not knowing the reason will not magically solve the problem but it will resurface (Fvck's sake's I sound like Dr Phil here). It usually all comes down to interest level's and the type of girl she is. High interest level's from your girl with a good head on her shoulders with you being a DJ is the best recipe. Think about it.... if you are a DJ you got tons of girls running after you,,,,,your girl knows you can replace her with in a blink of an eye..... which brings it do the core issue: would you really tolerate bad behaviour and tell her to grow up???!! NO! you just bump her because you got other girls to see who won't give you hard time. THE FEAR OF BEING BUMPED FOR OTHER GIRLS IS THE FEAR THAT WILL INCREASE HER ATTRACTION IN YOU AND WILL ENSURE THAT SHE WON'T DISRESPECT YOU. well your right to some extend. like i said. it depends on the value you put in the disrespect. if a girl flakes on me twice in one month shes gone. if she flaked on me twice in one year then i let it slide, but if she did something very disrespectful, talk sh1t behind my back, or something along the lines that i find really got to me, i would bump her. when ur girl steps out of line, u tell her its unaccepable and it still conitues is it u punish her by taking the attention away to an extend it depends on your tolerlation and HOW much you willing to put up. and the things you'll let her slide. if your doing it on a daily basicly or a few times a month then its obiviously she needs a bump. A Dj mind is great. he doesnt need to tell him or his gf that he can replace her, rather than show the people. you can easily tell a great person. you tell who is confident, you can tell who is a sh1t talker or is a puzzy, its the value your girlfriend puts in you. i rather SHOW my girl that im capable of replacing her and I will. she WILL know that my foot is on the ground, before we start dating. i always make it clear(non verbally) that i dont take sh1t.
So now you are going to use the same tactic they use against us. Any girl tries to use the silence treatment on me will not work because it's purpose is to get arise out of me and make me worry and cave in to her demands (like she is always used to from dating AFC'S). When they see that it doesn't work and I am the same cheerful carefree guy they end up abondening this dreadful tactic. Don't use tactics like that its counterproductive and you would look like a wuss. like you said "Sometimes silence is golden." well it hasnt failed me once. because i use it wisely. A girl never disrespected me bad enough that i had to do MORe than the silence treatment. its all about trial and error. you and me know that. there isnt any rules. no such things. there are things like GUIDELINES but nothing that will get u to a marriage. its all trial and error, what works best for you. personailly i love the silence treatment. its easy and effective. well for LTR that is. not too well for dating.
By giving her ultimatum's and threatening her you just proved to her how little power you have in this relationship. If she flakes on you for a friend then she wasn't that interested in you to begin with and she won't really care if you don't see her again. i wouldnt call it threatening. more of stating the facts. but im talking based on a LTR, maybe you are talking from a different perspective. im talking on based 3+ month relationship. if your girl flaked on u once, you tell her. that u will not accept that kind of sh1t and that shes out the know if she does it again. and if she does it again soon then shes out but if she does it again 8 months down the road im sure u can let it slide. i have little toloreance. thats just me, im a nice guy but NOT to nice, i do have my foot down. im warm blooded at the same time. thats something I personally have to work one. but i developed bigger balls in the last 6 months or i shoulsd say my last ex. which u and me know.
Respect is earned never given. Why the magic number 3? so she is off the hook 2 times but the third time is the big 'no no'?? As I stated before your girl needs to realise that she can be easily replaced with a snap of a finger by another girl and its not done with telling her but with her seeing it with her very own eyes
respect is earned. im not going to deny that. your 100 percent right. i earn my respect by respecting the individual. the the magic number 3? its my guidline. but it varys along with the time frame. like i said if a girl flakes twice in a month shes out no question asked. its all about how much tolerance u'll put up. i just said number 3 for a guidline for guys who have NO balls. maybe i should have explained the 3 with more deapth. my bad on that part.
you right again, my girlfriend WOULd know from the begining that she can be replace. she doesnt need me to tell her, im a great guy. i got lots to offer at the same time I deverse good. **** i dersve perfect. im not clingy, nor incesure(when im not in my afc days) i know personally what i got to offer.
and other ppl see that aswell., i got girls telling me frequenly telling me how good my personailty is and how sexy it is. even my ex told me i had the best personality she known. thats ME. i dont need to tell people that.
thanks for the conversation Djdamage, your one the memebers on here that i place a much higher value of respect then the average. you taught me lots with your post man, props, i look up to you
