"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Bad Wingmen: Share your stories

A

AmIAFC

Senior Don Juan
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This happened on the month of December, 2006.

A good friend of mine and I decided to hit the bars in Downtown, hoping to have a good time and strike good conversation with beautiful women.

We entered a bar, and separated. I struck up a conversation with a decent looking gal who was leaning at the bar alone, sipping on her mixed drink --- totally oblivious to the world, it seems. Our conversation endured because we shared quite a few things in common.

I glanced away from her momentarily, when I saw my friend emerge from the crowded dance floor with two nice looking women. Brimming with confidence, I thought to myself, “This will be a very good night!”

Almost immediately, I noticed something wrong. The two females looked annoyed. They asked my friend, “Is this him?” He says, “Yeah, this is my friend!” And I chip in, “Hey, guys, everyone having a good time?”

This is when my so-called wingman spills the whole deal. Apparently, he asked the two girls to “help” us with our game, confessing to that we came to sarge (he even defined what that was for them) and that we were new to this. Her reiterated all of this to me, the two girls, and, basically, to everyone who was within earshot of his blabbering (including the girl who I was speaking to, originally).

I don’t know why he did it. I guess he felt that if he were more “honest” or whatever, we’d have a bigger chance of success.

That didn’t happen.

After a few chuckles, the two girls walked off, saying they had to use the ladies room (never came back), and the girl I was talking to moved on, as well.

What about everyone else?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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A

Alphamale1821

Senior Don Juan
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LMAO bro your wing is a hinderince to your game. I'd rather go solo or give him a pep talk on what NOT to say. That "honesty" vibe comes of as "nice" guy. Get rid of him or or make prep him up next time. Needless to say it takes time, but thats funny bro.
 
T

The Deacon

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I had this one "wingman" totally try to make me a fool in front of these girls. He looked so dweebish doing it too, and he totally effed up the set. He wasn't cool or anything, he was trying to go for that "cool frat boy" vibe or some stupid sh*t. The girls said they "had to go to the restroom," (I guess that's the universal excuse) and I never saw them again during the whole night. I guess he didn't get the memo that the "cool frat boy" vibe only works when you're actually cool. What a tool.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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M

Mr. Me

Master Don Juan
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It's the machinations that get me. I met a couple of guys at a lounge and I played dumb, and they were telling me all about how they're wingmen and then they got to demonstrate their technique.

They pointed out a girl who had entered with her friends while we were talking, and, they noticed, who had looked me over. So now they were going to get her to join us.

So they pull out a small digital camera and one of them goes over to her to ask her if she'd take our photo, while the other dude is explaining this technique of how this will draws her into our frame where she sees we're having fun and she'll want to be part of it.

So she takes our picture from about 6 feet away, hands the camera off and goes back to her friends.

And I'm laughing on the inside, poker face on the outside, thinking this is a helluva lot of effort for nothing.

Isn't it easier just to go up to someone and start talking? I think so.
 
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