Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Bad idea to make the first move on a "taken" woman?

affliction

Don Juan
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Here's the situation.

I have a neighbor who is pretty good looking ( 6 face, 9 body ) but I was never really interested in her cause she lives with her boyfriend of 1 year (who I know, and find to be a pretty cool guy) and she is also friends with my mother (neither of them have jobs so I guess they just sit around all day together.)

She comes over occassionally to smoke some pot with me (she is a big pot head) and usually it's just a quick bowl & she leaves. However, the past 3 days she has come down every day & seems to stay a lot longer. Last night, she stayed for like 2 hours. She also wore some really revealing clothes showing off her body & immediately commented on how "big my bed was" when she walked into my room. It sounds like an obvious come-on when I type it, but she said it very non-chalantly & changed the subject almost immediately after.

Anyway, I found the "signs" a little too ambiguous to act upon, so we just ended up getting high & talking. I want to f*ck her but I feel like I need a powerful IOI in order to make a move. Am I being a p*ssy or am I right to be apprehensive? After all, I know her boyfriend and hes a cool guy & she is really good friends with my mother. What do you guys think?

Should I...

1. Make a move & try to f*ck her?
2. Wait for her to give a sign that she's "ok" w/ cheating, then make a move?
3. Forget about it entirely & find an available women?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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affliction

Don Juan
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Just wanted to add a few more things. First of all, one of her room mates has just moved out, and her boyfriend is now working a night time job. This just happened recently, so it could be a case where she is just bored now & is looking for company.

I know we're always supposed to assume the girl is interested, but is there a chance that she's just lonely & comes over out of some lame kind of friendship? I've never really done anything to be friendly with her. The weed we smoke is always hers, and yesterday she offered $10 if I would let her use my pc to download some songs to burn on cd. As an AFC I would have let her do it for free, but I'm going to take the money this time.

Or should I change it up & tell her to keep the money & give me a massage instead? Any good ways to play off that? I don't usually feel nervous making moves on women who show interest, but a rejection from this girl could get messy if she yapped to her friends/boyfriend about it.
 

Bonhomme

Master Don Juan
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Bros before hos

If you want to make a move on her, wait for them to break up first. Then she would be fair game. Defrinitely avoid any sort of involvement beyond pot smking buddy while they're going together.

You're not being a wuusy, you're just having a bit of integrity.

It is often true a gal will pick out a new boyfriend before breaking up with her old one, but since you know the guy, be a man about. If she breaks up with him, it's all on her. But concentrate on others until then.

I don't believe friends' exes are off-limits. But they have to be exes.
 

affliction

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Well her bf isn't really my friend. I wouldn't even call him an aquaintence. I don't know him beyond the occasional "whats up" or just some bullsh*t talk about the land lord (same land lord for our properties.) He is bigger than me, though, and could probably kick my ass. :D

You're probably right; it's a good idea to just keep things friendly. But, to be honest, I'm not interested in being her friend or boyfriend..I just wanna nail her. A f*ck-buddy living next-door sounds like a sweet deal to me.

I wouldn't be surprised if she came over again tonight. I'll turn the kino up a notch & see where it goes. Not gonna try to force anything too suddenly, though.
 

DJD

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IMHO, you should let her make the first move for a couple of reasons ... 1) she knows that you know she has a boyfriend, whom you at least know... 2) women love to exert their sexual power over men... and she probably knows that you think she's hot, so if she's interested in having sex with you, she'll make it a bit more apparent... Bottom line: due to the boyfriend and other related circumstances, she knows that she'll have to let you know that it's okay to pursue her... I'd definitely wait on this one.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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icecreaman

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This should be easy. You said you smoke pot with her right? All you have to do is get on the topic of sex and it is over. Pot makes people horny, all you have to do is put her in the mood. If you wait for her to make the first move it will probably never happen. If she cares about her man, she wont let it happen but all you can do is try. She might even start to look at you in a good way(or a bad way, but who cares right?) Trust me in the right situation women can be pursuaded to do anything.
 
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