Bad idea from the start?

[Rawk Steady]

My long-time ex set me up w/ a chick. They were all out at a bachelorette party, my ex was talking about me, how I was a great guy & single, etc. Called me up and put this girl on, got her number easy.

A few days later I called and set up a lunch date. Kept it light and funny, and ended it early. She was wondering if I liked her or not.

Next week, a real date. Did everything the DJ way....a weekday night, action date. Mini golf followed by a fun restaurant. In between the two I went for the kiss because if felt right....she responed no problem. Afterwards at the drop off had a nice little make out session. She said she hopes I call her. She was cute and fun and seemed high IL.

So I waited a week, called to set up another...too busy with no counter offer. Another week, another call...sounded happy to hear from me but when I proposed a date & time again too busy. Said she would call me when she knows when her schedule will free up. She is busy, 2 jobs but c'mon, interest = making the time.

Argh. My next move is no move, if she wants to see me she will call......right? (and what about the whole "confident persistence" thing). And I wonder if I shoulda followed up with this anyway, since if was set up by my ex. It's nothing to me, since we are way over, but ex and this girl are kinda friends and I bet it felt awkward in retrospect. Should I just let this one go?

 

[joey37]

I'm not sure why, but I'm getting an uneasy feeling about this girl being friends with your ex. It sounds like your ex wanted to make you sound like a great guy at first, but might be talking smack about you to her friend once she saw that her friend was interested in you.


I might be wrong, but when a girl you're interested in is friends with your ex, there's a lot of potential for trouble on your behalf.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Rawk: Yeah your thinking is right on!! The ball is definitely in her court, let her come to you, because YOUR THE PRIZE!! The only error you made was waiting a whole week to call. When you've created good vibes boardlining towards attraction, its always a good idea to call the girl 2-3 days later while those feelings she has of you are still fresh. Waiting a week might have her think your not as interested as you are. Another possible scenario, is the girl might be thinking it would be weird to get involved with her good friend's X. Maybe she wants to cut it off so their friendship doesn't suffer?


PIMP

 

[Pap]

Bro, girls are state-based creatures and although you may have conveyed higher-value and gained attraction and comfort while you were with her, she will base her decision to see you on how she feels when you are talking to her. I suggest you just throw a party and invite her to come with you...or next...I mean, there's so many beautiful girls everywhere and it's so much more efficient to simply pickup another girl. However, if you are waiting for her to call you, it's probably not going to happen unless she is really connected to your social circle and you still have strong comfort and connection.

Cheers,

Papa

 

[Rawk Steady]

Yup

I do agree that waiting so long to call after the first high IL date was a bad idea. I should have been more aggressive.

But there were a lot of other factors that would lead to her cooling off so I won't worry about it. Too bad for her.

 

[Pap]

Yeah...I just noticed that you call in weekly intervals...I used to do that several years ago...and it's not the way to go. The best way is to work the phone and convey your personality over the phone and if you feel you have a connection, and comfort after a few minutes, go for the meet...especially if the pickup was short.

Now, on the other hand, if the pickup was a longer pickup, say 1 hour in isolation, and you conveyed higher value, and spent lots of time on accelerated comfort building and rapport, then you may just want to flirt briefly and the go for a meet-bridge. It depends all on the state the girl is in and her buying temperature.

Cheers,

Papa

 

[echo1212]

Then again, if the delta-qui fragment issue is at hand, definetly go for the meet-bridges of madison county.

On the other hand, if the quasi-multi nanotech situation occurs, its always better to go with the positivity conudrum multi task therom.

But... if the I'aloneandhornypleasemenow danger danger will robinson situation arises, for sure go with the mejerkmyhand be all end all solution..it never fails. Good luck

Oh..and Pap..you're....suffering from BPD? I know you like these big abbreviations, so i'd thought I'd help ya out.

 

[Pap]

Thanks for noticing...champ...you're still cool.

 

[homie123]

----Then again, if the delta-qui fragment issue is at hand, definetly go for the meet-bridges of madison county.

On the other hand, if the quasi-multi nanotech situation occurs, its always better to go with the positivity conudrum multi task therom.

But... if the I'aloneandhornypleasemenow danger danger will robinson situation arises, for sure go with the mejerkmyhand be all end all solution..it never fails. Good luck

Oh..and Pap..you're....suffering from BPD? I know you like these big abbreviations, so i'd thought I'd help ya out.-----
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LMAO at echo!! That is hilarious. Pap does seem to go somewhat overboard on this stuff. Ya think?