Backstabbers and people who hate their lives

[Drum&Bass]

Hung out with some people who I thought were my friends..I got sick and they used to opportunity to kick me when I was down and talk behind my back . I was in a position where I was helpless and needed help but instead I almost got killed and was treated like garbage.

Luckily I had 1 true friend who got me out of the situation alive and safe.

Now All those same people have to face me and the phonyness of their personality is glaring brightly ! Asking me all these questions if I'm OK, and giving me compliments and trying to make things seem like they are concerned and they care about me.

The most hurtful thing was the amount of people that stabbed me in the back and took advantage of my moment of weakness, the same people I would bend over backwards to help and treated with respect, even when I was in really bad shape no one had any human compassion to help me out (except my 1 friend).

Lately as I get older I'm starting to get alot of this treatment from people I'm around (but I'm also noticing a pattern in the types of people that are behaving like this). anyone else experiencing this?

 

[KontrollerX]

Yeah.

I've encountered an overwhelming number of backstabbers and traitors in my life as well both male and female.

Sometimes you wonder is it because the world is bad or is it our friend and relationship partner selection is off and we need to work on selecting better people to hang around?

Its a tough question to answer but regardless I suppose the healthiest way to go is to ditch people who wronged you and just keep trying to find good people to have in your life and use what you've learned about the scumbags who you thought were your friends or lovers to avoid meeting such phony people in the future and that can be really hard as many people wear the mask of congeniality quite well until their true dark side is revealed.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...
Lately as I get older I'm starting to get alot of this treatment from people I'm around (but I'm also noticing a pattern in the types of people that are behaving like this). anyone else experiencing this?

I don't think it's necessarily happening to you more because you're older. I think you are learning more about people and you are noticing the true nature of people, things that you may have just overlooked in the past.

Either way, accept people are typically defined by their actions. Being able to see their actions for what they are just makes it easier for you to understand the best way for you to allow them to interact in your life.

Something can be learned from every experience if you are willing to look.

 

[Gerard-890]

To the OP, people I've learned will always be people:

Looking out for the interests of themselves first over other people

I think it was JoeKerr who mentioned this but I could be wrong, but JoeKerr said that "Even people who do good, only do good because it interests themselves."

For this reason, if I were you OP, I would choose to have people in my immediate social circle who by "doing something good for others" it gives them interest, internal peace, and satisfication.

I'm like this, when I go out of my way and do something "good" for somebody, it makes me feel good as hell and I get sort of addicted to it. Now in the opposite situation, could I expect some of those people to do the same?

Well, this is when it goes back to what I said in the above paragraph, if I focus my "internal satisifcation from doing good to others" on people who "share that same internal-ness" then IF I get into a situation where I need them to do the same THEY WILL, because in a sense they are just like me and I am just like them.

How do you know if your friends are like this? Well you just watch them, Pook said you can judge the goodness of a person by what they are WILLING to do for someone that can do NOTHING for them. Do they help others that couldn't offer them anything back, etc?

Your best friend, your best girlfriend, your best business partner, is the one that you can "see yourself in," meaning you know that you would go out of your way for someone and they would too.

 

[jd782]

Hey. I understand. Not too much back stabbing. What thing I have experienced was. In my younger days. So-Called "friends" teased me alot. Would trash talk me in front of a hot girl I was trying to impress.

Then. When I stood up for myself, they would get defensive. saying, we were only kidding. What? Can't you take a joke? And when I would tease them. They would run off crying like a little punk.

 

[iqqi]

Some people just aren't worth much. They don't have SOULS.

But if you don't want to be one lonely mofo, just use them for what they are good for. I call mine "acquaintances". I text a bunch of them when I am looking for something to do, or "where the party's at". And I get a stream of info on what's going on for the weekend. And that's about it. It's just a larger network, to be in all the loops. Would I trust them? Nope. I have no higher expectations of any of them.

It is good to find one or two real true friends in your lifetime. You sound like you found one. Be glad!

 

[romangod]

The most hurtful thing was the amount of people that stabbed me in the back and took advantage of my moment of weakness, the same people I would bend over backwards to help and treated with respect, even when I was in really bad shape no one had any human compassion to help me out (except my 1 friend).

Lately as I get older I'm starting to get alot of this treatment from people I'm around (but I'm also noticing a pattern in the types of people that are behaving like this). anyone else experiencing this?

The only thing I can say is that you should cherish and appreciate that one true friend you have and learn and grow through this hard time in your life. I recently had a brush with death and I was blessed with true friends and a great family. My dearest friend rose above and beyond the call of duty and it is true that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. As we get older, life gets more complex and should be more rewarding as we grow into Mature Men. Unfortunately, I see a lot of immature men here on the path to slow torture and spiritual pain. I'll give you all a little secret about the big picture. It's all about Love, Hope and Faith. Master those three and life could'nt be more joyous.

 

[Drum&Bass]

total agreeance there Kontroller !!

Excellent points, Gerard !

When I stood up for myself, they would get defensive. saying, we were only kidding. What? Can't you take a joke? And when I would tease them. They would run off crying like a little punk.

I hear yea JD !!! but sometimes I think their joking around is endearing because I'm physically bigger and stronger than my friends, so sometimes I let alot of of BS slide, when in reality I should call them out on it and set boundaries for that kinda stuff.

IQQI !! LOVED YOUR POST, thats gotta be one of the maturest, logical way of approaching people ever. awesome !

romangod !!! totally agree with ya man, sound advice, my friend.

 

[romangod]

romangod !!! totally agree with ya man, sound advice, my friend.

Thank you and have a very Merry Christmas.



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