aftershock
Master Don Juan
As of this weekend, I am now single. I have ended my LTR for the reason that I am bored of her - and I think even she was getting a little tired of me. I did try. But there is no point in continuing a relationship if you are not enjoying it.
SOMETHING I'VE LEARNED:
If, at any stage in a relationship but especially a LTR, ask yourself this question: "If I were single, and so were she, and based on everything I know about her, would I ask her out?" If the answer is no, then end your relationship.
I realised that despite my bragging rights over having one of the best looking women I've ever met on my arm, I wasn't actually happy. And I'd felt this way gradually for a while.
Now, all this of course means one thing - I am now free to pick up women
.
However, rather than concentrate on this, I've decided to concentrate on self-improvement. I've been reflecting over the last couple of days and I know that there are certain things I'd like to change about myself in order to achieve better things in life. I'm not saying that I'm not going anywhere as I am, of course, but I want to be a better person.
So, my aims;
1) THE PROBLEM
Fitness. I have become lazy and complacent. A LTR means you don't have to look your best, since they will always be there. I now realise that I'd like to improve this aspect of myself.
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
I would join a gym, but finances, time and location prohibit this. I'm going to re-take up jogging, and buy some weights. I'll do half an hour to 45 minutes of exercise per day, six nights out of seven.
I will give up junk food and fizzy drinks.
2) THE PROBLEM
My voice. I do not like my voice. I talk too fast and pehaps too high. This means that I do not make my presence as a man known as much as I should.
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
I'm going to use the thread in the Bible to do daily voice exercises, and to practice talking slower in social situations.
3) THE PROBLEM
Women hating. Recently I've become very annoyed with women for no reason. A couple of weeks ago in a club I openly told two chicks to fvck off because me and my mate were trying to talk. And yesterday I told a girl at work - a perfectly decent, nice girl - that she was annoying me and perhaps its better if we don't speak anymore. This is not the way to succeed with women.
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
Don't be a jerk, don't be nice; find that comfortable middle ground. I should feel honoured that women want to talk to me, rather than get annoyed by it, for one day I'll be old and not able to go clubbing.
Apologise to girl in question like a man, for that is what men do. And she has hot friends.
This is my main stumbling block. I don't want to approach until I learn to enjoy women again. At the moment they just irritate me.
4) THE PROBLEM
Related to #3, but too much negging, and too much arrogance. It's so negging that it isn't even negging; it's downright offensive. The arrogance isn't ****y and funny, it's downright bragging. Women do not like this.
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
Concentrate less on the negging and ****y and funny for a while. If I do, tone it down. I need to experiement to find the right balance like I used to - I've been doing it in my LTR, but not exactly number closing etc, so I haven't been seeing if it works or not!
5) THE PROBLEM
Temptation to get myself a fvck buddy - this is very possible and I have a number of candidates who I'm sure would be willing. I do not want to do this, as it will ruin my eagerness to approach.
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
Resist temptation. Avoid possible fvck buddies for a while - which isn't a problem since most of them don't live near me.
Once I'm getting numbers, etc, and have been for a while, I might call them up. But not yet.
6) THE PROBLEM
Getting too drunk to approach. At the weekend, I went out, messed up my chances with two HB8s who approached me together because I was hammered and then this HB? was coming onto me and I decided not to initiate anything because I was too drunk to tell if she was a HB Beer Goggles or a HB Without Alcohol, and I knew I might regret it.
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
Drink more steadily. I don't need eight or nine pints in a night to enjoy myself when four, spread over the night (six hours) - two to start with, one later then maybe one in the club - will do fine.
7) THE PROBLEM
It isn't really a problem, since I have loads of mates, but...
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
Improve social circle. The more people you know, the easier it is to meet HBs. Simple numbers game.
8) The last thing on my list is I need to finish reading The Game. I'm going to read a chapter a night I think. Should get it done quickly. I think that this will give me extra motivation.
On a side note, I was going to post a FR on a HB7.5 I approached earlier, but I honestly can't remember quite how I went about it. It seemed to flow pretty naturally - I just talked to her outside class, sat next to her, #. Too innocent for me though. I want fun, not a virgin who wants to marry me as soon as I bang her.
I've posted this mainly to help myself get it clear in my mind what I'd like to improve, but any suggestions/comments or perhaps encouragement are welcomed.
SOMETHING I'VE LEARNED:
If, at any stage in a relationship but especially a LTR, ask yourself this question: "If I were single, and so were she, and based on everything I know about her, would I ask her out?" If the answer is no, then end your relationship.
I realised that despite my bragging rights over having one of the best looking women I've ever met on my arm, I wasn't actually happy. And I'd felt this way gradually for a while.
Now, all this of course means one thing - I am now free to pick up women
.However, rather than concentrate on this, I've decided to concentrate on self-improvement. I've been reflecting over the last couple of days and I know that there are certain things I'd like to change about myself in order to achieve better things in life. I'm not saying that I'm not going anywhere as I am, of course, but I want to be a better person.
So, my aims;
1) THE PROBLEM
Fitness. I have become lazy and complacent. A LTR means you don't have to look your best, since they will always be there. I now realise that I'd like to improve this aspect of myself.
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
I would join a gym, but finances, time and location prohibit this. I'm going to re-take up jogging, and buy some weights. I'll do half an hour to 45 minutes of exercise per day, six nights out of seven.
I will give up junk food and fizzy drinks.
2) THE PROBLEM
My voice. I do not like my voice. I talk too fast and pehaps too high. This means that I do not make my presence as a man known as much as I should.
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
I'm going to use the thread in the Bible to do daily voice exercises, and to practice talking slower in social situations.
3) THE PROBLEM
Women hating. Recently I've become very annoyed with women for no reason. A couple of weeks ago in a club I openly told two chicks to fvck off because me and my mate were trying to talk. And yesterday I told a girl at work - a perfectly decent, nice girl - that she was annoying me and perhaps its better if we don't speak anymore. This is not the way to succeed with women.
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
Don't be a jerk, don't be nice; find that comfortable middle ground. I should feel honoured that women want to talk to me, rather than get annoyed by it, for one day I'll be old and not able to go clubbing.
Apologise to girl in question like a man, for that is what men do. And she has hot friends
.This is my main stumbling block. I don't want to approach until I learn to enjoy women again. At the moment they just irritate me.
4) THE PROBLEM
Related to #3, but too much negging, and too much arrogance. It's so negging that it isn't even negging; it's downright offensive. The arrogance isn't ****y and funny, it's downright bragging. Women do not like this.
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
Concentrate less on the negging and ****y and funny for a while. If I do, tone it down. I need to experiement to find the right balance like I used to - I've been doing it in my LTR, but not exactly number closing etc, so I haven't been seeing if it works or not!
5) THE PROBLEM
Temptation to get myself a fvck buddy - this is very possible and I have a number of candidates who I'm sure would be willing. I do not want to do this, as it will ruin my eagerness to approach.
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
Resist temptation. Avoid possible fvck buddies for a while - which isn't a problem since most of them don't live near me.
Once I'm getting numbers, etc, and have been for a while, I might call them up. But not yet.
6) THE PROBLEM
Getting too drunk to approach. At the weekend, I went out, messed up my chances with two HB8s who approached me together because I was hammered and then this HB? was coming onto me and I decided not to initiate anything because I was too drunk to tell if she was a HB Beer Goggles or a HB Without Alcohol, and I knew I might regret it.
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
Drink more steadily. I don't need eight or nine pints in a night to enjoy myself when four, spread over the night (six hours) - two to start with, one later then maybe one in the club - will do fine.
7) THE PROBLEM
It isn't really a problem, since I have loads of mates, but...
WHAT I'M GOING TO DO ABOUT IT
Improve social circle. The more people you know, the easier it is to meet HBs. Simple numbers game.
8) The last thing on my list is I need to finish reading The Game. I'm going to read a chapter a night I think. Should get it done quickly. I think that this will give me extra motivation.
On a side note, I was going to post a FR on a HB7.5 I approached earlier, but I honestly can't remember quite how I went about it. It seemed to flow pretty naturally - I just talked to her outside class, sat next to her, #. Too innocent for me though. I want fun, not a virgin who wants to marry me as soon as I bang her.
I've posted this mainly to help myself get it clear in my mind what I'd like to improve, but any suggestions/comments or perhaps encouragement are welcomed.