"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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back in August

Dryden

Don Juan
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So I had this girl I met on a dating site. It was a social network site. I didn't have a picture. It was a blonde. She was easy enough.

Over the course of the morning I chatted her up and got her to the point where she'd start to play down my worth. I became angry with her, surely she didn't have a chat like that every freaking friday morning in which she invested so much? Eventually I gave up and said "Look, I'm just wanting to have sex with you, if you are not into any of that, I might as well just split." to which she replied "If you want to fvck me you just have to say so!".

I went like, "but sweety, I can't just ask you out of the blue, can I? I mean bla bla bla". I told her in no uncertain terms that if I fvck a girl, I want her to feel good about it, etc. She agreed to that but quickly stopped responding. This was a girl that was hard to get to respond anyway. Perhaps the weakest statement that I made was that I asked her, "I mean, would you have said yes?", to which she replied "I don't know". The moment quickly fleeted and the window quickly seemed to close. Nothing came out of it. We kept talking more or less into the evening. I tried to get her to agree to come see me in the evening still. She declined although she was iffy. One moment she agreed, the next she declined. She gave me her number and we kept chatting more or less but it was gone. She refused my calls or for me to call her, always an excuse.

The prime moment were those few minutes after her admittal. I completely ****ed up apparently. What did I do wrong?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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thatfeel

Master Don Juan
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Why are you trying to bargain with this broad? You have a lot to learn. You're seeking her approval like a huge chump. Instant onset of vaginal dryness occured I guarantee it.
 

Willard

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You messed up by saying anything other that, "well now you know" or "I'm saying it now" or something similar and then see her response and go from there. You basically went from being a bad boy to a "nice guy" by saying "but sweety, I can't just ask you out of the blue, can I? I mean bla bla bla". I told her in no uncertain terms that if I fvck a girl, I want her to feel good about it, etc even worse was "I mean, would you have said yes?"

Don't feel to bad about it, even if you said all the right things she might have just been playing with you. Better luck next time, and remember girls like the bad boy not the nice guy.
 

Dryden

Don Juan
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Thanks Willard. Actually when I said that thing about her wanting to feel loved when I fvck her, I was doing a bit of a yes-ladder. I posed her a question "When I fvck you, you want to..." and she replied yes. Then I did another of those but fvcked up the words, and she probably didn't understand what I meant, and she fell silent. If the yes ladder had worked, I would have concluded by "And do you want me to fvck you now?" and she would have went "yes" most assuredly. I even played her mind a little later on when I went "When you come, can you bring me some fruit?" She went like "WTH, can't you buy it yourself?". I said well I have a bit of a problem getting to the stores these days. I said, is it really that much of a problem if you bring me some? She said no. I said then can you bring me some when you come? She went "oki". Then I said so I'll see you in a while and she went "erm, I'm not coming."
 
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