"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Awkward Silence During Dates

kingxxxman

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I always see this at restaurants. The guy and the girl are just sitting there looking in random places and not talking. I am one of those guys that just runs out of stuff to say? How do i get better at this? any books?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Fela Kuti

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I'm still learning myself but one saying that I always remember is, it's only awkward when you think it is. Maybe you could try what Uma Thurman said in Pulp Fiction. "Don't you hate that? Uncomfortable silences. Why do we feel it's necessary to yak about bull**** in order to be comfortable?" Haha.
 

backseatjuan

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I had one date where chic wouldn't shut up. I had to say absolutely nothing. That date led to sex on the back seat of my car after she got exhausted talking.

You can talk about anything and you have to have zero expectation of her responses. Talk to her like with a friend, drop the slightest thought of sex out of your head. Always lead the conversation.

Personally I take legal drugs, 3 300mg of Lyrica. But honestly that don't guarantee anything. Really have to come out of your shell and speak from your heart.
 

Powerofmindset

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If there is any sort of silence...i'll let it be for a little bit to see how she reacts to it. Usually if my gut is saying that she feels nervous about the silence i'll ask questions that I'm interested in. Example: I love music...so I'll ask her about music, such as "what genre of music are you into?" to follow up (if she didn't already answer) "which is your favorite band?" to follow up again, "What about that bands music do you find interesting?" There will always be awkward silence...whether it be right now when you are first dating or in the car when you are already in a LTR with a girl for a year. Don't let it phase you. Hold your frame. The idea of you even thinking that any silence = awkward silence is you believing you have to hold yourself or the date to a standard of hers. If you play that game, you've already lost.
 

Desdinova

Master Don Juan
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I let her worry about filling in those awkward silences. I just look around at stuff when I've got nothing to say. If she's worried that she's losing my interest, that's a good thing.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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st_99

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Desdinova said:
I let her worry about filling in those awkward silences. I just look around at stuff when I've got nothing to say. If she's worried that she's losing my interest, that's a good thing.
yeah, its not really anything to worry about. if you're nervous, it will show. if you're relaxed and confident, that will show also. And neither one really has anything to do with how much you talk or how many seconds of silence there is on the date. all that matters is that you are mentally in charge.
 

iwanttofight

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Let her worry about the awkward silences. Have a "I dont give a f*ck attitude" and she will be relaxed and not feel weird around your vibe
 

Holden Caulfield

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Make yourself a more rounded individual. You will never run out of things to say, if conversation is needed. Read diverse genres of books. Keep up to date on current events, take a few trips somewhere... and most importantly: Look for commonalities in what a woman talks about and dive "in". Easy to associate with others if you listen to what they talk about. Part of being social is the ability to find common interests with others.

HC
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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