Awesome Shy Girl

[Porky]

no, we're being helpful. they're telling you bull**** about how nice guys finish last and how you ****ed up with the eye contact by looking away.

if you don't like our advice, don't take it. but both of us know more than anybody else in this thread.

 

[LikRetsam]

no, we're being helpful. they're telling you bull**** about how nice guys finish last and how you ****ed up with the eye contact by looking away.

if you don't like our advice, don't take it. but both of us know more than anybody else in this thread.

 

[Mediocre]

Sorry, I misunderstood you.

Yes, you are being helpful.

I think the others in this thread were trying, but I really don't think that it would work. The only thing I think I really need to work on is confidence.

Thanks, and sorry about that. I just didn't understand what you were saying. I thought you were referring to my posts, rather than the other posts.

 

[Sparkyy]

He says hes a nice guy and theres alot of space in the nice guy catagorie for example:
a)He could be a guy who lets people walk all over him and still treat them nice
b)he could be a person who is nice to people but wont take even the slightest bit of **** from anyone.

"Nice guys finish last" is just used for the purpose of not confusing new people because most AFCs have the wrong idea of nice. A DJ can be nice but still gets laid more than the jerks. All rules are breakable as long as you have the attitude down. The rules are just to help you learn the attitude. Why the **** should he change how nice he is just for a girl, not everyone is comfortable being mean to other people.
By the way to Mediocre you are over-analysing things. You have seen her show interest so she is interested. Maybe shes less interested but when you approach her interest will increase. Approach her when she least expects it and just ask her. If shes shy she will probably at the very least be happy and will more than likely accept.
Think of it as in soccer. If you never shoot you never score. Just go for it it'll be worth it the longer you leave it the longer youre giving some AFC to muster up the courage to ask her out. Good luck.

 

[Mediocre]

Sparkyy, thank you.

I find that you, Porky and LikRetsam have given me the best advice in this topic.

I think that I may stay around these forums a while, even after I've solved my problem. It looks like many of the people here are so uncomfortable with themselves that they think they need to be someone else to attract girls.

Now I know from experience that this isn't true. I'm not particularly good looking, funny, confident or suave. But I am intelligent. She likes that.

Everyone has something about them that makes them attractive. They just don't realize it.

In summary:

If a girl doesn't like you for who you are, you probably shouldn't be with her anyway.

If a girl likes you for yourself, then you may just discover that she's a good match for you.

Fakery won't make her love you.

EDIT: Should I start using low level kino before or after I start dating her?

 

[oakraiderz2]

Originally posted by Mediocre
You are being very unhelpful.

Please stop.

Thank you both very much.

EDIT: Here, let me explain it to you this way.

If I have to act like someone I'm not in order to get a girl, it's not worth it to me. If there really is, as all of you seem to assume, no other way to get a girl, then I guess I'm screwed.

But I'd rather be screwed than be fake.

You sound like a little bia*ch.

 

[Deadly_Assassin]

Apparently, she likes nice guys.

how did u reach this conclusion, by her action or by her words?Shes a shy person so she might be scared to talk to the popular guys. Just because shes talking to the nice guys doesnt mean that she most likely goes for that sort. I mean you talk to ugly chicks dont you, but do u go for them?

I'm not particularly good looking, funny, confident or suave. But I am intelligent. She likes that.

She might like you being intelligent, but she might not like you acting like a wuss and not approaching her. You say she has lost interest. I say the next time you see her you go upto her and start talking to her. And the whole time you talking to her dont break eye contact till she looks away first. Smile the whole time, it will make her smile too. If shes having a bad day or her period dont be discouraged try again next time, if same problem persists dont bother talking to her again till she actually intiates it. When you go talk to her dont about einstein or shakespeare, talk about herself, her interests, what does she get upto during the weekends, what music etc.

If a girl likes you for yourself, then you may just discover that she's a good match for you

But then why dont you improve yourself n become a funny, confident or suave guy. By improving yourself you are becoming that person, you are not put on a mask.

I will agree with you on that last one, especially if you are after a LTR with this chick. You say you wanna work on your confidence, you still at high school, play some sports, and take up wrestling as well.

Try reading Mr. fingers The Ten Commandments, Pook-kill that desperation, Be a Man, you might as well read all his posts.

 

[Mediocre]

Just because shes talking to the nice guys doesnt mean that she most likely goes for that sort.

I reached that conclusion because she's been staring at me in class and acting nervous whenever I talked to her. I know that she likes me. I'm a nice guy. Therefore she likes at least one nice guy.

She might like you being intelligent, but she might not like you acting like a wuss and not approaching her. You say she has lost interest.

No, I've been talking to her. I can tell she's still interested.

But then why dont you improve yourself n become a funny, confident or suave guy. By improving yourself you are becoming that person, you are not put on a mask.

I agree. I'm just saying that In'm not going to act like I don't care what she thinks about me, because I do and I want her to know it.

Try reading Mr. fingers The Ten Commandments, Pook-kill that desperation, Be a Man, you might as well read all his posts.

Thank you.

You sound like a little bia*ch.

I couldn't care less about what you think I sound like.

 

[Osiris7250]

let me restate my advice.....

He could be a guy who lets people walk all over him and still treat them nice

-this is what you seem to be like...

PS. I'm looking for a long term relationship here, not the sex. I could care less about sex.

-this is what you want right....

as for a chick that likes "nice guys" .. It won't last more than 2 weeks

-this was my point....(hmm, maybe i wasnt be a jerk off)...

as far as my "hostile" attitude goes... well maybe you should state that you were "jokingly" insulting me.....

im not here to argue with you or anybody else for the matter.... but overall if you want to have a LTR you cant be a complete nice guy, being a gentleman is one thing as long as you know when to show some balls (athority). nobody said you have change yourself. but self-improvement will only help you....

 

[Deadly_Assassin]

I reached that conclusion because she's been staring at me in class and acting nervous whenever I talked to her. I know that she likes me. I'm a nice guy. Therefore she likes at least one nice guy.

then why dont you ask her out?

 

[Mediocre]

then why dont you ask her out?

Because I have about zero confidence.

-this is what you seem to be like...

Sorry, but you're wrong.

If someone is treating me like crap, whether they're male or female, I'll fling their crap right back at 'em.

Of course, I've never had a girlfriend before, and if she's treating me like crap it'll probably take me a little longer to respond. I am confident, however, that I'll be able to do it.

as far as my "hostile" attitude goes... well maybe you should state that you were "jokingly" insulting me.....

Damn, I assumed you had read the thread. MidwestFreek thought I really meant it too, so I told him. I (mistakenly) thought you had read the explanation and were treating me like **** anyway.

overall if you want to have a LTR you cant be a complete nice guy, being a gentleman is one thing as long as you know when to show some balls (athority). nobody said you have change yourself. but self-improvement will only help you....

What about a confident nice guy? That should work, eh?

 

[idiot_boyfriend]

Originally posted by Mediocre
I've always been attracted to her, and lately I've noticed a lot of the tell tale signs. She plays with her hair, stares at me and when I talk to her she seems sort of abashed. Plus, one of her friends asked me what kind of music I liked, for absolutely no reason as far as I can see.

That's all I need to see.

Ask her out; the sooner the better. By wasting more time, you're giving yourself more chances to screw up. If you like her and she likes you, the next logical step is to bump up that relationship.

That is....if you want a relationship with this girl....

 

[idiot_boyfriend]

Originally posted by Mediocre
Because I have about zero confidence.

In that case, read the bible or do the bootcamp. That should solve everything.

 

[Mediocre]

OK, I'll just ask.

The next question is: Where?

I don't see her outside of school, and there I only see her in class or with friends.

I don't really want to ask her in class. I don't think that would be "suave" at all. So does anyone have any ideas about how to ask her?

 

[Deadly_Assassin]

I don't really want to ask her in class. I don't think that would be "suave" at all. So does anyone have any ideas about how to ask her?

Suave is not where you ask her, Suave is not when you ask her. Suave is with what attitude or mindset do u ask her, is how you ask her.

WTF???All you need to do is get a conversation flowing with her first. Get the vibe going, like tease her a bit, or be a bit playful with her. Get her to relax around you. Then just ask her what shes upto in the weekend. Then just say hey I am going to bla bla bla to do bla bla how about you join me. I would really enjoy your company. Remember how pook said " focus on the fun n not on the chick, the chick is just coming along for a ride into your world"well something like that.

Because I have about zero confidence

Do u know how to ride a bike?How did u learn? Did you just watch people ride their bikes and you automatically started riding yours? You had to practice, and more practice. Did you get it straight away the first time? did you fall over a few times?Did this ever stop you from riding your bike, boo hoo I fell over and hurt my knee, now I am in pain, I dont ever wanna ride a bike again. Ah poor Mediocre. No you kept going till you got the hang of it. Try remembering the first time you actually did it after a lot of practice, didnt it feel good, didnt it make you feel confident? didnt all that pain and suffering, the time and effort seem worth it all?

Now when you ride your bike do u think about what you are doing? If I were to ask you hey do u think you can ride that bike. You are gonna say yes. You are gonna be confident about riding the bike cos you know you can. But you still fall down or have an accident from time to time. But it doesnt stop you. Your confidence might be shattered a bit, but you still get up and try again. Thats exactly with girls as well. The more you practice the more you learn and the more experienced you get. This is where your confidence comes from. Your experience.

 

[Mediocre]

Ah poor Mediocre.

Yeah, I love you too.

 

[Deadly_Assassin]

Yeah, I love you too.

cheers, I just wish you were the girl of my dreams.

dude you will do fine, just ask her out and post us on what happened. Another thing, when you are gonna do this, dont focus on the outcome whether she says yes or no, remember focus on urself. You are inviting her into your world, into your lalaland, if she doesnt want to come for that ride someone else will.

 

[Mediocre]

dude you will do fine, just ask her out and post us on what happened.

I'm thinking about trying minigolf.

Eh? Good idea, bad idea?

EDIT: Or maybe coffee... hmm...

Damn, I don't know.

 

[LikRetsam]

I will refrain from unleashing unpleasantries on this thread.

zero confidence... What a pathetic existence. Do you realise that a GIRL is making you **** your pants, come to online discussion forums so that you can over analyse **** that isn't worth 2 squirts of piss in the goal of asking her out in a predetermined way that won't happen?

Where is your ****ing self respect? Where is your sense of being? You have just admitted defeat in front of the most harmless of foes. Congrats.

 

[Mediocre]

Where is your sense of being? You have just admitted defeat in front of the most harmless of foes. Congrats.

Lack of self confidence isn't admitting defeat, it's admitting that you have a weakness that you need help to overcome.

Damn, lay off the insults. I'm being honest because I'm looking for help.

And since when are you my "foe?" I mean, ****, a lot of you people just look at my posts, say something stupid and shallow like "AFC" and tell me I'm a douche. God damn, most of you seem to have taken the "be a jerk" advice and applied to your entire life.

In conclusion: I appreciate that you're trying to help me, but why the hell can't you do it politely without the sarcasm? I just don't understand you people.