Avoiding me after intimacy

[yopablogi]

Avoiding me after intimacy - new data. Advice needed.

Hello My friends! I Need your advice. I have a problem with a certain girl.
I 24 and she is 20. I meet her In club, and after 3 dates, relation was developing in good direction. We text a lot, she even said she missed me. On 4th date she come to my place and stay until next day. We drink a little, watch movies, we kiss although she was reluctant and the beginning and I gave her a massage that developed into me kissing her body and fingering her *****. It surely was great for her althought she didnt allow me to make her orgasm, she just moved back right before climax. She didn't want to return a massage.. Then I decided after 2 hours of fun : time to go Steep tomorrow we go on a trip..

And from the very next day everything has changed. She become closed, distanced, relucant and unwilling toward me, (maybe even kind of angry). She is still Texting me from time to time but it is not the same and occasional good night sms.. I asked her out sever times, she give lot of excuses, and met with me only one time in last 4 weeks and said she must come back home after 1h …

She was distanced, closed off but friendly..

Meanwhile I had a serious injury on a duty (i am firefighter/paramed.) after which i was in hospital for 2 weeks and she declared that she will visit me but she didn't. I got angry with her and stop texting and after several days she tried to re-initiated contact few times and finalny i answered. Now i will be seeing her twice a week in her school.. But she is still distanced and closed. I had several women before but this time i fell i really love that girl and care for her so much, if not i would move on much earlier but i am willing to invest time and effort in order to win her.

My question for you is how should i behave, act, toward Her, What kind of tactic should i use to open her up and make her willine again. What can I do? What should I do?

 

[VladPatton]

She seems to of lost interest somewhere along the way. Try to distance yourself and make no contact until she contacts you. Then when she does, set up a date. In other words, have a direction you want to move in. If she flakes on you and doesn't keep the date, it's time to next her. Not worth pursuing because she has low interest. Personally I would next her right now, but if you want to try one more time, try this. Good luck.

 

[Purefilth]

^^^ this.

Consider her nexted unless she contacts you.
If she does, game on! - Date, smash&dash
If she doesn't, youve already nexted her and have other chicks to play with, so its no loss.

 

[muscleman]

You need to change the title of your thread, it's very misleading. She is avoiding you because you DIDNT give her any intimacy. You didn't fvck her, even after 3-4 dates. Too late now.

 

[DonJuanabe]

"You need to change the title of your thread, it's very misleading. She is avoiding you because you DIDNT give her any intimacy. You didn't fvck her, even after 3-4 dates. Too late now."

Ding, ding, ding. A back rub is not intimacy. Kissing is not intimacy. Intimacy is one thing and one thing only: f*cking.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

I find it amazing that people on these boards are able to type these types of stories out and NOT realize everything they're typing just SCREAMS out how uninterested the girl is in them.

Allow me to pinpoint what I'm talking about:

On 4th date she come to my place and stay until next day. We drink a little, watch movies, we kiss although she was reluctant and the beginning and I gave her a massage but she didn't want to return a massage..

Reluctant to kiss you? SHE'S NOT INTERESTED. Doesn't reciprocate giving you a massage? Doesn't want to touch you extensively 'cause SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.

Just because a girl agrees to a few dates (where she gets free food, free rides, and free attention) doesn't mean she likes you.

And from the very next day everything has changed. She become closed, distanced, reluctant and unwilling toward me, (maybe even kind of angry).

Girls who like you don't suddenly become distant, closed, unwilling or angry. And WHY is she angry, exactly? Oh, that's right - because she feels pestered by you because SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.

She is still Texting me from time to time but it is not the same and occasional good night sms..

She went from lots of communication to much less? SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.

I asked her out sever times, she give lot of excuses, and met with me only one time in last 4 weeks and said she must come back home after 1h …

Being around you isn't pleasurable to her. In the span of a month, she only had time to see you ONE time, and even then she put a time limit on it. Why? SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.

She was distanced, closed off but friendly..

Friendly isn't the word - she was TOLERATING you for the time she saw you, even though she didn't want to be there 'cause SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.

Meanwhile I had a serious injury on a duty (i am firefighter/paramed.) after which i was in hospital for 2 weeks and she declared that she will visit me but she didn't.

In other words, you got mad at a girl who didn't come to see you after you nearly died. And why didn't she come see you? Because SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.

I got angry with her and stop texting and after several days she tried to re-initiated contact few times and finally i answered. Now i will be seeing her twice a week in her school.. But she is still distanced and closed.

She contacted you because, even though SHE'S NOT INTERESTED, she probably missed the attention. Now that you've given her attention again, her ego boost has been met and she can go back to acting distant towards you.

I had several women before but this time i fell i really love that girl and care for her so much, if not i would move on much earlier but i am willing to invest time and effort in order to win her.

You've only been out with her, what, 5 times?? It's not love, dude - right now it's just infatuation. Plus, regardless of what you're feeling, she's not feeling it back. There's no point in putting in the time and effort if she's running away from you because SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.

My question for you is how should i behave, act, toward Her, What kind of tactic should i use to open her up and make her willing again. What can I do? What should I do?

This isn't the movies. A girl only needs to be won over in that first impression - after that, if she ain't liking you, it's a WRAP.

If a girl likes you, she makes it EASY for you to be with her. If she's making it difficult by giving you attitude, not responding to your messages, or seeing you on a regular basis, she's doing it on PURPOSE because SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.

What should you do? Ignore her, start chasing other girls. This isn't advice given with the outcome being "Oh, if you ignore her she'll start liking you and want to see you." It's given with the outcome that you will FIND SOMEONE ELSE WHO IS ACTUALLY INTERESTED IN YOU.

 

[yopablogi]

Hahaha thanks you my friends, for opening my eyes! I thought it is same kind of massive buyers remorse becouse i escalted too quickly with her and was sure she liked me before, so that she bahave like that.. Still meditating on that...

 

[foreverAFC]

I find it amazing that people on these boards are able to type these types of stories out and NOT realize everything they're typing just SCREAMS out how uninterested the girl is in them.

Allow me to pinpoint what I'm talking about:



Reluctant to kiss you? SHE'S NOT INTERESTED. Doesn't reciprocate giving you a massage? Doesn't want to touch you extensively 'cause SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.

Just because a girl agrees to a few dates (where she gets free food, free rides, and free attention) doesn't mean she likes you.



Girls who like you don't suddenly become distant, closed, unwilling or angry. And WHY is she angry, exactly? Oh, that's right - because she feels pestered by you because SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.



She went from lots of communication to much less? SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.



Being around you isn't pleasurable to her. In the span of a month, she only had time to see you ONE time, and even then she put a time limit on it. Why? SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.



Friendly isn't the word - she was TOLERATING you for the time she saw you, even though she didn't want to be there 'cause SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.



In other words, you got mad at a girl who didn't come to see you after you nearly died. And why didn't she come see you? Because SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.



She contacted you because, even though SHE'S NOT INTERESTED, she probably missed the attention. Now that you've given her attention again, her ego boost has been met and she can go back to acting distant towards you.



You've only been out with her, what, 5 times?? It's not love, dude - right now it's just infatuation. Plus, regardless of what you're feeling, she's not feeling it back. There's no point in putting in the time and effort if she's running away from you because SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.



This isn't the movies. A girl only needs to be won over in that first impression - after that, if she ain't liking you, it's a WRAP.

If a girl likes you, she makes it EASY for you to be with her. If she's making it difficult by giving you attitude, not responding to your messages, or seeing you on a regular basis, she's doing it on PURPOSE because SHE'S NOT INTERESTED.

What should you do? Ignore her, start chasing other girls. This isn't advice given with the outcome being "Oh, if you ignore her she'll start liking you and want to see you." It's given with the outcome that you will FIND SOMEONE ELSE WHO IS ACTUALLY INTERESTED IN YOU.

great post.

reminds of something Pauly Shore once said about women, "Either they are into you or they arent"

 

[yopablogi]

I belive it some kind of messed up asd? Is it possible to overcome it? Is it not too late?

 

[yopablogi]

I am sorry,Ive just realized I overlloked the most important detail. The massage developed into me kissing her body and fingering her *****. It surely was great for her althought she didnt allow me to make her orgasm, she just moved back right before climax.....

Can someone please answer my question one more time...??

 

[yopablogi]

Any insight?

 

[Iceberg]

Any insight?

There's nothing new to add here. What more do you want us to say?

If a girl wants to be there, she'll be there. There's nothing you can say or do to trick her into being attracted to you. It's not about buyer's remorse, or whatever nicer way you want to package it. It's about her, for whatever reason, determining that, "Hey, I don't think I like yopa as much as I thought I did."

If she's gone cold, then your best bet is to go cold as well.

Not sure what else you want. I'm not gonna be like, "Oh you fingered her! Well that changes everything!"

 

[muscleman]

If she's gone cold, then your best bet is to go cold as well.

Not sure what else you want. I'm not gonna be like, "Oh you fingered her! Well that changes everything!"

Taking this one step further, you could have even fvcked her and she still ignore you afterwards. Some girls actually just want a one night stand and to never talk to you again. I've been 'used' this way before (and I don't regret it).

 

[Purefilth]

Taking this one step further, you could have even fvcked her and she still ignore you afterwards. Some girls actually just want a one night stand and to never talk to you again. I've been 'used' this way before (and I don't regret it).

especially fun if you know theyre just doing it to get it out of their systen, because they think youre an a$$hole, but you make their panties wet!:crackup: