"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Autism/Asperger's -- official symptoms and diagnosis

whistler

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This is a follow-up to a number of threads that mention autism (especially one by dice).

I thought I'd put the symptoms front and center in a new thread.

The following is an excerpt from the DSM-IV, the diagnostic manual used by mental health professionals. It's not the latest version, but the info likely remains unchanged in the current edition.

BTW, this info isn't complete or exhaustive, but it is what would be used to make a diagnosis.


A. You need at least 6 of the following characteristics. Two must be from the first set, and one each from the second and third sets.
1.
a. marked impairment in the use of multiple nonverbal behaviors such as eye-to-eye gaze, facial expresssion, body postures, and gestures to regulate social interaction.
b. failure to develop peer relationships appropriate to developmental level
c. a lack of spontaneous seeking to share enjoyment, interests, or achievements with other people (e.g., by a lack of showing, bringing, or pointing out objects of interest)
d. lac of social or emotional reciprocity

2.
a. delay in, or total lack of, the development of spoken langauge (not accompanied by attempts at alternative forms of communication)
b. in individuals with adequate speech, marked impairment in the ability to initiate or sustain a conversation with others
c. stereotyped and repetitive use of language or idiosyncratic language
d. lack of varied, spontaneous make-believe play or social imitative play appropriate to developmental level

3.
a. encompassing preoccupation with one or more stereotyped and restricted patterns of interest that is abnormal either in intensity or focus
b. apparently inflexible adherence to specific, nonfunctional routines or rituals
c. stereotyped and repetitive motor mannerisms (e.g., hand or finger flapping or twisting, or complex whole-body movements)
d. persistent preoccupation with parts of objects

B.
Delays or abnormal functioning in at least one of the folowing areas, with onset prior to age 3 years:
1. social interaction,
2. language as used in social communication, or
3. symbolic or imaginative play

Asperger's Disorder is similar to Autism. The main difference is that the following are relatively normal:

language development
cognitive development
curiosity about the environment


whistler
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

Visceral

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SCHIZOID PERSONALITY DISORDER

A pervasive pattern of detachment from social relationships and a restricted range of expression of emotions in interpersonal settings, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by four (or more) of the following:

1. Neither desires nor enjoys close relationships, including being part of a family
2. Almost always chooses solitary activities
3. Has little, if any, interest in having sexual experiences with another person
4. Takes pleasure in few, if any, activities
5. Lacks close friends or confidants other than first-degree relatives
6. Appears indifferent to the praise or criticism of others
7. Shows emotional coldness, detachment, or flattened affectivity
 

Visceral

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AVOIDANT PERSONALITY DISORDER

A pervasive pattern of social inhibition, feelings of inadequacy, and hypersensitivity to negative evaluation, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by four (or more) of the following:

1. Avoids occupational activities that involve significant interpersonal contact, because of fears of criticism, disapproval, or rejection
2. Is unwilling to get involved with people unless certain of being liked
3. Shows restraint within intimate relationships because of the fear of being shamed or ridiculed
4. Is preoccupied with being criticized or rejected in social situations
5. Is inhibited in new interpersonal situations because of feelings of inadequacy
6. Views self as socially inept, personally unappealing, or inferior to others
7. Is unusually reluctant to take personal risks or to engage in any new activities because they may prove embarrassing
 

whistler

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Sweet.

Keep 'em coming.

If anyone else has access to bona fide lists of symptoms of AFC/DJ-related psychological disorders, please... add them on.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

hungry_american

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Bull**** in my opinion. They come up with a disorder for anything and everything. Just to keep jobs for psychologists. "sir im afriad to say , you have the sex addiction disorder" :crackup:
 

whistler

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Originally posted by hungry_american
Bull**** in my opinion. They come up with a disorder for anything and everything. Just to keep jobs for psychologists. "sir im afriad to say , you have the sex addiction disorder" :crackup:
I often find myself in same train of thought.

But to actually be an official disorder, there needs to be a number of carefully documented and verified cases of that disorder. Plus the condition needs to be severe.

I've read through the diagnostic manuals. And, in reality, there are only a handful of what I would call "iffy" disorders.
 

Visceral

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NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER

"Pimp/Golddigger Disorder"

A pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), need for admiration, and lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:

1. Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)
2. Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
3. Believes that he or she is "special" and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)
4. Requires excessive admiration
5. Has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations
6. Is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends
7. Lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others
8. Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her
9. Shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes
 
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Visceral

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ANTISOCIAL PERSONALITY DISORDER

"Jerk/Bad Boy Disorder"

There is a pervasive pattern of disregard for and violation of the rights of others occurring since age 18 years, as indicated by three (or more) of the following:

1. Failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are grounds for arrest
2. Deceitfulness, as indicated by repeated lying, use of aliases, or conning others for personal profit or pleasure
3. Impulsivity or failure to plan ahead
4. Irritability and aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults
5. Reckless disregard for safety of self or others
6. Consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or honor financial obligations
7. Lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another
 

Visceral

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HISTRIONIC PERSONALITY DISORDER

"Attention ***** Disorder"

A pervasive pattern of excessive emotionality and attention seeking, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:

1. Is uncomfortable in situations in which he or she is not the center of attention
2. Interaction with others is often characterized by inappropriate sexually seductive or provocative behavior
3. Displays rapidly shifting and shallow expression of emotions
4. Consistently uses physical appearance to draw attention to self
5. Has a style of speech that is excessively impressionistic and lacking in detail
6. Shows self-dramatization, theatricality, and exaggerated expression of emotion
7. Is suggestible, i.e., easily influenced by others or circumstances
8. Considers relationships to be more intimate than they actually are
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

Blue Phoenix

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Nice thread! ;)
 
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