Attractiveness

[Monkora]

I have bad acne on my cheeks, it's not inflamed but it's there A LOT of scars, red marks etc... and there's nothing I can do to get rid of it, tried everything possible, had it for about a year and a half. This year I want to try and improve my socialness and romantic encounters with girls as I seem just to be stuck in a million friend stages. But I feel like my skin is going to make this impossible. Thoughts?

 

[jeffthechef]

it's like being overweight,m underweight, short, tall, bald, stupid, smart

there's truly no difference

i read this somewhere on this site

there's two types of attraction

1. initial attraction- attraction that a girl feels based off of her preferences
2. built attraction- attraction that she feels based on everything else...how you treat her, personality...basically your pick up skills

just make her feel...get her thinking about you...and number close quickly

the earlier in your interaction with a girl, the easier it all is

 

[Monkora]

I feel like I'm quite good looking facially. But bad skin is just hard to take seriously.

 

[CaptainJ]

I use this really good facewash twice a day and it stops me exploding in spots. It's a high alcohol based facewash which is anti-bacterial, if you haven't tried anything like that, then I suggest you go and buy some.

 

[Monkora]

Seperate issue, didn't want to start another thread.

I started school again on Tuesday. First day was good I seemed to have a lot of enthusiasm from those around me. It downed down today though, and talking more with those girls has died down a bit.

My first problem are 3 subject classes. In my chemistry and physics classes some of the more popular people (who I get on well with, they say hello to me often) are in front of me in a row of four. Then there's me on my lonesome behind them then other people fill up the rows behind me and on the other side of the aisle. I feel like a real **** on my own and am definitely not in the mood to sit with the other guys, I was wondering how to get a couple of these 4 or 5 girls to sit on my row. In physics however behind me are their sort've 'equals' in males who I feel a bit shadowed by - they're tossers but I just don't have the nerve to become friendly with those girls while they're right behind me. But there is a spare seat on the girls' row in that class, should I just sit there next time?

As for maths, same girls on other side of class and same girls in front of me. But because I've sat in the seat behind the other girls next to same older girl acquaintances I feel like I can't move up next to them.

Sounds awfully silly and obvious I know but some real dynamics I'm trying to maneuver.

EDIT: Also, I have the feeling I'm getting 1-3 girls on a string. Next time I'm in the right environment I was wondering how to get THEM to kiss me rather than the other way around. Just to avoid appearing like I'm going after one girl.

 

[Brighty]

I recommend seeing a dermatologist if you haven't already. I had bad acne (well, of course when its on your own face even a lonely pimple looks like an unforgivable nightmare) freshman year until I finally caved in and saw a dermatologist. He prescribed me amoxocilin and my bad acne pretty much disappeared within 6 months or so (no real effort involved either, just taking a pill once in the morning and once at evening). It resulted in what I thought would be a huge boost in confidence, and while I did look more attractive, I still wasn't pulling any more girls than I did before. Sure, more girls approached me which saved me the effort of approaching them, but I didn't have the confidence to maintain their interest and once they caught on they left. It wasn't until a few years later that I truly developed confidence - something that can't come from trivial physical looks alone. And THAT confidence was what started giving me results, and I realize that now that I could've had the same results even freshman year - the acne wasn't holding me back, I was.


Long story short: Unless its an extremely disgusting case, its purely psychological and its not hurting your game as bad as you think it is. But... I do recommend treating it for the confidence boost - just know that it's just one piece of the puzzle.

 

[Monkora]

I've been to derm, been on 3 different kinds of anti-biotics both pill form and topical form. The only think I haven't done is accutane, which is a no go for me. It's definitely fading, and it just looks like a part of my face since it's not inflamed. What do you think about the other issues?

 

[Brighty]

I've been to derm, been on 3 different kinds of anti-biotics both pill form and topical form. The only think I haven't done is accutane, which is a no go for me. It's definitely fading, and it just looks like a part of my face since it's not inflamed. What do you think about the other issues?

I'm not too sure about the situation you have, but maybe try the following, depending on how comfortable you are:

1. Find one of the girls you want to sit next to before class, maybe in the library or something, and have her help you out with some homework or something and walk with her to chemistry. Try and maintain a conversation from when you started walking all the way until when you sit down, and sit down next to her. That way, if anyone has a problem with you sitting in "their" row (They shouldn't) you hardly seem intrusive at all since you're just continuing your conversation with the girl.

2. Sit in the unoccupied seat in the girl's side of the classroom.

3. Make friends with one of the guys.

If it's one thing that has surprised me the most in high school its that you don't have to be "equal" in the popularity scale to get girls. Just because they're jocks doesn't mean they're DJs by any means. Senior year I've realized that the people that I thought were DJs (simply because they were "popular") were some of the most insecure bytches in the school.

Honestly, I know its hard, but don't feel intimidated by the "cool kids" in the back when you're trying to talk a girl. If they even have half the qualities of a DJ or a level headed guy they won't give a **** if you're trying to spit game, hell, they probably won't even notice. If they are douchebags are try calling you out or making snide remarks, call them out on it. They're insecure as fyck if they try ****blocking anyone - take that and run with it and really hammer home what a f***** they are for doing so. Whatever you do, standing up for yourself is paramount... but do it in a dismissive way. Don't show them that they're getting under your skin.


Lastly, ask yourself what's worse:

Sitting by yourself for the rest of the year and not talking to that cute girl because you're afraid of what the jocks in the back MIGHT say (I know, you're thinking that as soon as you attempt to even flirt with a girl they'll call you out on it... or at least thats how I felt, when in actuality it's just teenage anxiety talking and the chance of them actually doing that is relatively low, but still it doesn't hurt to be prepared in case you are caught off-guard).


OR


Manning up and talking to that cute girl, even on the low chance that you get some flak about it. Who the fyck cares, if you don't let it affect you you've got nothing to worry about it. The worst thing that can happen is that you don't take any action.

 

[Monkora]

Thanks, giving me the push I needed. I'll post tomorrow and tell you how things go. Also! I'm taking my restricted drivers test tomorrow, if I pass I'll have a lot more freedom.