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If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

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Attractive women with goofy guys

mrgoodstuff

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Interesting. I want to say i know that a man can be confident and living his best and still be aware of her being a target. Sometimes the best in the entire room.

This does not by default make you insecure it makes you intelligent and aware with the proper set of tools.
The bigger the man the more people trying to "play" him.
 

zekko

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Not necessarily true. Its better to be alone vs be treated like shyt.
Who's to say he's being treated like shyt though? The only real disadvantage is if the guy is expecting more out of the relationship than he's receiving, and if that's the case it's on him. The guy in the basement might gladly trade places with him if he's lonely. Also, there are guys here who say they use attractive female friends as social proof, I could see that working.

Don't get me wrong, I don't really believe in male/female friendships. They probably exist, but they're extremely rare. In the vast majority of the cases, one has covert romantic or sexual desires.
 

HyenaPrince

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The other night I had a boy's night out at an outdoor restaurant/bar, first time going out in any capacity since early March. There was live music and a lot of people congregated in the courtyard. Anyway, one of my friends pointed out that there were a ton of very attractive women out that night and he made a comment about how we were the only guys there that even looked in shape. I looked around and I noticed the guys were just not particularly good looking dudes, out of shape and yet were with these very attractive women. This is an observation I've noticed a lot in the past and then we had a discussion about it.

One of the things we all agreed on was that many women will date men that in some form or another are already within their social circle, as it is safe and comfortable. Another thing we discussed was that women may have a lot of insecurities around men they perceive as potentially just pumping and dumping them, cheating on them, etc. None of this has to do with game or money, as at the end of the day such a small percentage of men will have any of this going for them to the point where it will allow them to land better women.

I've had some experiences in the past where I'd try to talking to some 4 at a bar and she turns her back on me and yet I'll her talking with some hipster looking weirdo.
You never know what really goes on behind the curtain. Those guys might have unreal confidence, money or tickets to VIP seats for an event (rather unlikely rn).

Also, never put too much emphasis on initial conversations. Women are extremely clever when it comes to psychological games. She might randomly talk to a guy just to trigger another guy. Maybe it was just a timing thing. Maybe you f*cked up the approach and she turnt to the closest guy available.

If you don't look like Gollum, your looks won't kill your approach. Your appearance only distinguishes you if you're at least 6 feet tall and look like a combination of Brad Pitt and Johnny Depp in their twenties. This is rather rare in the classic social setting, so you're good to go if you're charismatic and confident.
 

mickdollaz

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The reality is, some guys just can't be helped and sanghelios is one of them.

The strange thing is, the more objective feedback you give him, the more he doubles down on his own negativity, which actually just makes things worse.

Basically, all he is looking for are fellow mopers and losers. The incel community should be perfect for him.
 
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mrgoodstuff

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Who's to say he's being treated like shyt though? The only real disadvantage is if the guy is expecting more out of the relationship than he's receiving, and if that's the case it's on him. The guy in the basement might gladly trade places with him if he's lonely. Also, there are guys here who say they use attractive female friends as social proof, I could see that working.

Don't get me wrong, I don't really believe in male/female friendships. They probably exist, but they're extremely rare. In the vast majority of the cases, one has covert romantic or sexual desires.
The woman can be using him. You think it's better to be used vs being left the fvck alone?
 

Solomon

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The other night I had a boy's night out at an outdoor restaurant/bar, first time going out in any capacity since early March. There was live music and a lot of people congregated in the courtyard. Anyway, one of my friends pointed out that there were a ton of very attractive women out that night and he made a comment about how we were the only guys there that even looked in shape. I looked around and I noticed the guys were just not particularly good looking dudes, out of shape and yet were with these very attractive women. This is an observation I've noticed a lot in the past and then we had a discussion about it.

One of the things we all agreed on was that many women will date men that in some form or another are already within their social circle, as it is safe and comfortable. Another thing we discussed was that women may have a lot of insecurities around men they perceive as potentially just pumping and dumping them, cheating on them, etc. None of this has to do with game or money, as at the end of the day such a small percentage of men will have any of this going for them to the point where it will allow them to land better women.

I've had some experiences in the past where I'd try to talking to some 4 at a bar and she turns her back on me and yet I'll her talking with some hipster looking weirdo.
Are you in the midwest?

If not this is how it is in the midwest. cold approaching in 2020 can work but during covid19 it's a fool's errand especially with a food shortage coming up (that's another topic though) most guys who you see with hot women here is cause of social circle. Social circle will always be King here
 

Zontyy

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Through some of my own self reflection I always thought of myself as the goofy looking guy with the great looking girl. I have a few things going for me like my height and face. I look at myself though and see a muffin top with a roll of fat and no upper body muscle. Which I am actively trying to fix gentlemen.

I think a lot of the attraction I been able to get came down to be upbeat positive person always doing something fun between hiking, fishing, sailing, swimming, amusement parks, zip lining etc etc.

If your a good looking dude there must be something your doing wrong. You should really self reflect on what you are doing wrong or what is wrong with you that your not attracting the females that you want and continue improving yourself.

116611579_619374078736239_5740495465764777385_n.jpg 117357395_2523861124519776_1414214641852480128_n.jpg
 

mrgoodstuff

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There are plenty of times it's preferable to be used, than to be the target of a woman with wedding bells in her head, who's already practicing her new signature...especially if she isn't exactly your ideal, anyway. What's wrong with being used? 9 times out of 10 you're probably just using her, too.
Being used if your not fvcking her isn't helping you. It doesn't add confidence to deal with fake like and fake love. The energy of being with a lady whose present but not into you doesn't help either. It's better to be alone and wait for those who will appreciate and value your company.
 

HyenaPrince

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There are lots of ways to be used. She could be using you to make someone else jealous. I had a jealous husband show up with his brother, to collect his wife, once. I didn't even know she was married, but the only way they could've known where she was was if she called him, and she was fast asleep on my chest, when they nearly knocked down the hotel room door. I hope she got all the drama she was hoping for. She was a little crazy.
That b*tch.
 

zekko

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Being used if your not fvcking her isn't helping you. It doesn't add confidence to deal with fake like and fake love. The energy of being with a lady whose present but not into you doesn't help either. It's better to be alone and wait for those who will appreciate and value your company.
I agree that's usually the case, for most guys. But everybody uses everybody for something. It really depends on who you are and what you're looking to get out of it. Maybe the guy in the basement might rather be out having a good time and meeting some new people, instead of sitting in the basement looking at porn. The world doesn't begin and end with sex.
 

Mike32ct

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I agree that's usually the case, for most guys. But everybody uses everybody for something. It really depends on who you are and what you're looking to get out of it. Maybe the guy in the basement might rather be out having a good time and meeting some new people, instead of sitting in the basement looking at porn. The world doesn't begin and end with sex.
Yeah kind of my thinking.

I’m also not sure a basement dweller could easily go from zero women in his social life to having a solid plate or gf.

I think the “Don’t give women any non-sexual attention” is solid advice; but it is too advanced for a beginner guy.
 

mrgoodstuff

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I agree that's usually the case, for most guys. But everybody uses everybody for something. It really depends on who you are and what you're looking to get out of it. Maybe the guy in the basement might rather be out having a good time and meeting some new people, instead of sitting in the basement looking at porn. The world doesn't begin and end with sex.
Its not fun if she doesn't really like you. It's not all about sex.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Well, in some cases she likes you, she just doesn't "like like" you.
She can like you but not like you enough to fvck and represent you well if you go out. But most folks are using people these days.
 

mrgoodstuff

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In theory...but, have you ever had to try to gently explain to a chick who's C R A Z Y into you WHY it would never work out, only to find out that some "crazy drunk amazon" just threatened your date, in the bathroom, months later? Not as fun as it sounds, explaining to your 5'7" date that the angry drunk 6'0' blond in the bathroom just didn't take the breakup well, but really wouldn't hurt her. Spending a little time with a beautiful woman, who just doesn't want to be alone, doesn't sound too bad, by comparison; although, these days, I myself would rather be alone. So, I'm with you there.
That's bad drama. An almost unignorable distraction.
 
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