Attraction and Interest...Are they 2 different things?

[TheInfamousCBear]

Listen...

Ive been thinking about some things...They might of been said on here, but I dont care...

Alot of threads on here have been about girls flaking or girls showing interest and not going anywhere with it or whatever...It could be that the girl was attracted to you, but she doesnt want to go out with you or anything...Sh1t, I know for myself that there are girls that Im attracted to and I would smash, but I dont want anything else to do with them...Now we now most girls need to do all that extra sh1t in order for you to hit, and there are some girls that will just fukk cause they think you are hot or something...That could be what you are going through with your situations...

Then there are some girls that are undateable due to responsibilties...When they ask you out and they flake or they reschedule, they may or may not be bullsh1tting you...But you gotta handle that on your own, or listen to what people on here say...

So....

Attraction = She likes you
Interest = She would like to spend time with you...
If you really look at it like that, they arnt the same thing...

Discuss...

 

[AlwaysExcel]

I already posted about this in another thread but you need to check out Woodhaven's thread on this subject in Advanced on mASF. I think you especially would find it interesting.

 

[The TallOne]

Originally posted by AlwaysExcel
I already posted about this in another thread but you need to check out Woodhaven's thread on this subject in Advanced on mASF. I think you especially would find it interesting.

Mind postin a link?

 

[AlwaysExcel]

http://www.fastseduction.com/discussion

look under Advanced for a thread titled Balancing Attraction with Value: Eliminate Flaking

 

[seabreeze]

This is an awesome question that I have just begun to think about myself. I look forward to reading the replies.
SB

 

[Wyldfire]

No, they aren't the same thing. A girl can be attracted to you but not be interested in you romantically. However, in order to be interested in you romantically she HAS to be attracted to you.

 

[The TallOne]

Originally posted by Wyldfire
No, they aren't the same thing. A girl can be attracted to you but not be interested in you romantically. However, in order to be interested in you romantically she HAS to be attracted to you.

Quite the paradox, eh?

 

[Bonhomme]

No paradox

There's no paradox in Wildfyre's statement. It's just that romantic interest is a subset of attraction interest.

Tiger is to cat as romantic interest is to being attracted.

I do think a lot of gals flake because they get to thinking, and get second thoughts about going out with a fellow they're attracted to. For example, they might think the fellow won't commit.

 

[Dukester]

Originally posted by Wyldfire
No, they aren't the same thing. A girl can be attracted to you but not be interested in you romantically. However, in order to be interested in you romantically she HAS to be attracted to you.

great statement- so much truth to that.

if you are attracted to somebody you are interested in them. if you are interested in them, you dont neccessarily have to be attracted

 

[AlwaysExcel]

Errr, Dukester you just said that exact opposite of Wyldfire! lol!

What Woodhaven was saying is that attraction and value (or interest as some of you call it) are 2 distinct things. Attraction is one person chasing another to get validation. Value emcompasses lots of things. See his post for a list.

Woodhaven says having value/interest but no attraction means being in the friend zone. Having attraction but no value means having a girl acting "interested" and flirting with you but flaking on you in the end. (Even makeout and ONS could fall into the attraction without value category but Woodhaven does go into surface attraction vs deeper physical attraction) As far as value and attraction go, you can have one without the other. No subsets.

Wyldfire is right about needing attraction to be ROMANTICALLY interested. BUT don't think of attraction as a subset of value/interest or vice versa. The term "romantic interest" actually means "attraction + value/interest" according to Woodhaven. I wanted to make the distinction because I got confused when I first read through Woodhaven's post. It's real easy to think of being attractive as being "valuable" or having "value" as being attractive. But that's using the terms differently than they are used in the mASF thread.