Attention wh0re problem (long story)

[PuertoRican_Lover]

I couldn't read all of your shyt because it was full of drama and a dude doesn't go through this much drama without having some personal problems or self-esteem issues! Control your anger - it probably doesn't look good on you!

This sounds like a ghetto trailer trash pick-up! Where is the prize??

She has a b/f and you give her a ultimatum!! HUH??? When you give a woman an ultimatum then you know that you have lost control!! You look and sound desperate to tell a woman to leave HER man for you!!! WHY should she????

She owes you nothing - move on!!!!

Read DJ Bue Phoenix's thread on Attention WH@res!!! The attention wh@re may be you! You decide.

 

[Nightspark]

sh!t all that damage in one ultimatum!?

okay i think i should stop these and now i see what that girl meant by she remembers more negative than positive.... hhrrm

thnks Blue Pheonix

 

[gonzo]

Originally posted by ThunderMaverick
Dude, how old are you and this chick?

I'm 23 and she's 22.

 

[Don Juanabbe]

My funniest encounter with an attention hor was getting another girl who was only a friend to show up at this place where the AW frequented.

This girl who was only a friend agreed to 'pretend' to be all over me in front of her. She had no problem necking with me right in front of the attention hor. I told my friends that I was going to do this because I was sick of the attention hor's drama.

So everyone acted naturally and watched as the attention hor went mental. She looked like a cat dunked in water, having to watch me fool around with my friend who is actally quite a little hottie. My buds still get a laugh out of that one because they new what a little game player this AW b*tch was.

Turn the attention hor to your advantage. This is what's great about having alot of backups, you can then get back at her. Childish? Maybe. But fun as hell and good for a laugh with the boys plus I got some tail out of it with my hot blonde friend.

What I've learned is that some women love this sh*t, they love helping you screw over another chick, especially if she's of the AW type.

I did something similar another time with some girl who kept instigating lots of flirting, EC, and kino, but refused to give me her phone number. I resigned myself to this, but this girl keeps flirting with me, so to get her to stop I brought a date into the bar that the AW frequents and the AW was really visibly bothered by my date's presence.

She tries now to get back at me by having guys hang off her who she is obviously not interested in - she never shows intimacy with them or anything like that. But it's all a feeble attempt on her part because she already got burned.

But it's funny because I bring dates in all the time and make it obvious that I'm schteefing them.

I used to hate attention hors because I'd been burnt quite a few times, but now as I said, I love f*cking with their heads because in reality, it's so easy!

That's how you deal with attention hors who think their all that.

It takes a little work, and some might call me a loser for it but I just can't help it, I'm a vindictive b*stard with people who f*ck with me.

So I say, BRING 'EM ON!!

 

[gonzo]

Blue Phoenix you were right. Things are going from bad to worse. She has started to bad mouth me in the class. A few of the girls are starting to treat me as if I was a sex offender. It's obvious from the way they look at me that she has been rubbishing my rep. Soon I will be a pariah I reckon because the guys, although recognising that X is a nut, will not abandon the girls to hang with me.

Let me clear up a few things.

I don't have an anger problem. I haven't shouted at her or insulted her. In fact, my attempt at writing the e-mail was to calm the situation and avoid a confrontation (that worked out well didn't it?!).

X is a beautiful and highly intelligent woman. She is not trailer park trash I assure you. She went to Oxford University. We are training to be lawyers. Her boyfriend is a high-earning lawyer (while I am still a poor student). Still, she has major psychological problems.

I didn't give X an ultimatum as such. I tried not to sound desperate. I told her I had feelings for her, that her boyfriend did not make her happy and that she should leave him for me. I did not beg her to leave him. I gave her a choice not a demand.

I didn't flat out call X a manipulative attention seeker. I said that she was showing many signs of interest and that either she was actually interested or was faking it for attention. I thought that was sufficiently subtle to get my point across while not starting a slanging match.

I guess I put a lot of effort into getting this girl and had a lot of my self-esteem riding on it as a result because she was so miserable with her boyfriend (going by what she told me) and he was such an ugly, boring, charmless, humourless lump. If I couldn't get the better of a guy like that I thought, what chance would I have with other girls? That was my screwed up thought process. Now I know how stupid I was.

It's easy for you armchair cassanovas to tell me I shouldn't have got emotionally involved or duped. But she was so convincing. So conniving. So manipulative. As another poster said, she would constantly pressure me into revealing that I had feelings for her. I tried to resist for months but finally I cracked.

 

[DJDamage]

But she was so convincing. So conniving. So manipulative. As another poster said, she would constantly pressure me into revealing that I had feelings for her. I tried to resist for months but finally I cracked.

AW are very convincing and conniving and manipulative, its hard not to fall for their trickery. That is why its important when you first meet a new woman (any woman) that you refrain from reveling to her your personal feelings and insecurities.

An Attension Wh0re uses the information of your personal feeling and insecurities and will manipulate you for her enjoyment. Most of the time they are unaware themselves at their bad behaviour. Once she is done with you and you show her any kind of hostility she will use the information of your personal feeling and insecurities to crash you. Its a fact that women are always seen as a victim when a relationship crumbles regardless as if it was her fault or not and therefore people will be more incline to believe what she tells them then you.

Gonzo in order to deal with an AW, youv got to start thinking that you are not dealing with a resnoble adult but an emotionaly unstable 12 year old child. You cannot reason with a child and tell her she did you wrong because in her mind she is unable to see the errors of her way but only yours because its you that made her feel bad by pointing to her the faults of her charcter. The damage has been done and it seem that you have got one revegeful girl in your hand.

Another thing to add is that most AW do not like their relationships regardless how well it is going, they will always try to find faults in them. Her telling you that she is in a bad relationship is hipocracy by itself because depsite it all she was still with him.

 

[dearsappho]

Gonzo - You have exactly the same problem Im having at the mo...I recently ditched a girl for exactly the same reasons. The similarities are uncanny...(she dont have a bf tho)

She ignored me for a week, but as soon as it appeared I'd lost interest (I blanked her at work - sad innit?) she calls me up and demands to know what she had "done wrong". I was coy in my responses and hey presto...

...she thinks its back on

but ( in part after watching 'The Shape of Things' for inspiration - a fantastic yet frightening movie) the tables have now turned.

Emotional detachment has returned and now its my turn to have some fun...mwuhuhuhuhuh!!!

 

[Donald Kaufman]

1. lots of male friends
2. always busy
3. often tired and grumpy
4. friends with her ex
5. previous boyfriend was very rich (owned an expensive boat)
6. great actress (drama queen)
7. poor excuses for not meeting up
8. very few female friends
9. shielded me from her other friends

*bows to accuracy of list*

I have dealt with a lot of AWs and felt I could spot them fast and deal with them effectively. This list just took two girls out of the can't quite place them category and firmly in the AW camp.

Thank you Seasonedplayer. I also agree with DJDamage. This is gold. Best sum up of AW behaviour I have seen.

You could probably go on the road with it Jeff Foxworthy style.

She has a lot of male friends ... she might be an AW
She shields you from her other friends ... she might be an AW

(i hate the fact I know who Jeff Foxworthy is, i hope i at least misspelled his name)

 

[MacDiddy]

Don J: Sometimes the best defence against AW is a good offence.

 

[seasonedplayer]

Some more observations. When I was out with my new AW on that date, she told me that she recently went out with a guy on 3 dates. She then had to dump him because he wanted to go out with her after only 2 weeks of knowing her. Her excuse was that he was too forward and she got scared away. I then said 'you obviously didn't like him.' Her reply was 'I did but wasn;t sure.'

Bottom line is this guy was not too forward. He was getting all the right signals from her and all the flirting. He thought he was in. He then was very forward and told her his feelings - only natural for someone that thinks they are in. Happens a lot with AWs

Gonzo, AWs will burn you. My original AW's crowd all dislike me. They spread negative rumours about you - it would kill them to see you with one of their friends

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Gonzalez, "highly" intalligent people don't tell a man "I'm going to get some dudes to beat you up!!" Unless, of course, you are threatening her and she is outright scared of you because of your anger derived from not getting YOUR way!! This is ghetto!

Why are you so stuck on a woman that is already taken?? This tells her that you want her more than she wants you - and you look desperate in her eyes!! She is saying "Damn, this dude is really desperate to have me if he knows I have a boyfriend yet he pursues me so doggedly!!"

Never be toooo eager to chase a woman - make a few attempts and if no positive concrete positive feedback then leave and move on to the next victim!! You are given her waaaay too much attention - especially when she already has a man!!

Keep your dignity and leave her alone and don't do this again with another girl!

 

[Blue Phoenix]

Originally posted by PuertoRican_Lover
Gonzalez, Why are you so stuck on a woman that is already taken?? This tells her that you want her more than she wants you - and you look desperate in her eyes!! She is saying "Damn, this dude is really desperate to have me if he knows I have a boyfriend yet he pursues me so doggedly!!"

You are given her waaaay too much attention - especially when she already has a man!!

Keep your dignity and leave her alone and don't do this again with another girl!

This happened because he felt in "love" really hard. Aws love to do that to guys and then leave them. That´s why those guys go crazy and "get obsessed" over those girls. It´s the same as letting a man get aroused and then walk away. They´re a huge tease.

This thread reminded me of those trashy girls: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?threadid=16739