Assistance please - what do to and say after an HB has got dumped?

[Asteconn]

Hey chaps.

Question: HB9 not long got dumped by her bloke. Need advice on how to get in there: obviously be fun and not AFC, but I'm not sure how to not be AFC in that she uses me as an emotional tampon.

I was thinking of taking her out over the weekend bowling or something?

 

[The Master Disaster]

... wait for a lil bit. Let that dust fall; then you sweep her off her feet.

A recently dumped girl is never going to look for another guy right away unless she didn't care for him but still. It's difficult.

 

[Asteconn]

The worst thing you can do is be her therapist. She will use you to voice her pain...so don't be her sounding board. It won't get you laid.

Besides, it is a major turnoff for a girl to talk about her ex...I refuse to listen to problems from any woman who feels hurt and tries to dump her emotional baggage from past relationships onto me...

If she mentions her ex, say, "Wow. I am sorry you got dumped. Is there anyone that you can talk to about it?"

Being the therapist is something that I want to avoid totally. Obviously I'm still a padawan in DJing, but that's one thing that I've read a lot, and thus have drummed it into my head.

I had a chat to her, asked her if she was free tonight (she's working). I don't know how to interpret the signs, but I did my utmost to maintain eye contact and smile. She seemed to me to do a bit of self-grooming whilst she was talking to me - good sign you think?

And I'll definitely remember that line - thanks.

... wait for a lil bit. Let that dust fall; then you sweep her off her feet.

A recently dumped girl is never going to look for another guy right away unless she didn't care for him but still. It's difficult.

Thanks. I was thinking the same. I'm not sure how to go about it though. Do you think that I should talk to her a couple of times to keep me on her radar? Or not at all?

 

[Bluesteak]

Rebound mate!

 

[Asteconn]

I wouldn't worry a bit about interpreting anything...if YOU feel that she is indicating interest, take it as such and act accordingly.

Also, I would avoid asking, "Are you free tonight?" Instead, I would have something specific planned, at a specific time...PROPOSE ameeting with her, and DON'T ASK.

Example:

"Listen, I've gotta go, but I want you to join me for a cup of coffee tomorrow evening from 5 to 6 at Starbucks on Main Street."

Let her answer; if she says she's busy and does not counteroffer, it's up to you to either next her or say, " OK. Well, I've gotta go. Talk to you later." Don't tell her you'll call her back. Call her in a week or two.

I was caught on the hop a bit; and I should have done really. I'll get in touch with her maybe tomorrow; or have a spy for her on tuesday next week (she goes to my uni) and tell her that she's coming bowling with me lol