asperger syndrome/autsim

[JHeights83rd]

I dont know if any body on this site knows about asperger syndrome/autism. I got it, its mostly males that get it. That affects social behavior. When i was growing up that **** was the worst, that made me a outcast. So needless to say, no girls in high school. But after high school its not as bad, but still kinda bad. Way back when i was kinda nerdy/weird/loser now i just come across as a little anxious/little weird/on edge and ****. I come across like this even when i think im relaxed. I read some real ****ed up **** saying that most of us with that condition dont marry or have sex.
Girls will say "well u should get someone thats the same as you" but it mostly affects males.

I hope im not the one that completely turns off girls so that they say "well, hes nice to talk to but, no not my type... only friends... i hope he finds someone."

If anybody knows aobut this condition... hit this thread up.

 

[Phyzzle]

Yep. Have it. It's way easier to deal with now at 30 than it was at 25, and easier then than at 20.

My love life's fairly normal, but even today, I still have the urge to wave small sheafs of paper ritualistically. So you can function very well with it.

Other people may disagree (strongly), but what helped me the most was ectasy and hallucinogens. I suggest you try them.

 

[SexPDX]

It's been while since I have mentioned it on here but I was diagnosed with it, and during my younger years I had all the social problems characteristic of people who have it. One particular quirk that people with this disorder have is that they tend to become obsessed with things, often to the exclusion of everything else. In 2001, I discovered the seduction community and became obsessed with improving that part of my life. It was at that point when I finally internalized that as much as *I* might be interested in something, other people don't necessarily want to hear it. That's a hard one for guys like us to hear but once you finally get it, things will be easier. Don't let it stop you.

 

[So Many Ways]

Yeah it does get easier to deal with as you get older. I was diagnosed with autism when I was little and I felt like a freak and an outkast growing up.

I was diagnosed when I was 3 years old, I was unable to communicate at all and I had those bizarre fixations that many autistics have. Eventually I became somewhat normal, but social interactions where always difficult and I felt like a complete outcast during my school years. The affect this has on your love life is severe, as I would literally tremble in the presence of a woman. It was pretty bad.

By the time I got to college, it became slightly easier dealing with social situations but it is always a struggle, even to this day. Like Phyzzle said, it does get a little easier to handle as you get older. Unfortunately I feel like I'm 10 years behind everyone else.

 

[JHeights83rd]

turn off for women

my girl-friend says i come across like anxious and nervous. N i told her its cuz of that and alot of that tripping nervous behavior you try to keep down, but it just comes out naturally. Then she asked if i ever had gf, i told her no, no action, never been more than friends. Then she followed up with more girly advice, like "who cares what girls think... who cares that girls dont dig you..."

So does the way you act turn women completly off and make them only wanna be friends with you?

 

[Rex Man]

Hey! I don't feel so bad! I got AS, left-handed, and HATED High School. Nothing really important to add, other than it's good to know others in the same boat, we're like 'family', J/P.

On a serious note, I hit (had intercourse with) more females than all but one of the people I really know. So to others, stop w/ the excuses, STFU and Sarge

 

[JHeights83rd]

not excuse/ a reason

rex man
stop w/ the excuses, STFU and Sarge

Its not an excuse its a reason: I dont act clingy, dont talk about other guys, we laugh and have good convo. Girls place me in the just friends category for a reason. People, not knowing me for a min, will question me if im a virgin/ever had a gf. Could be nervousness combined with acting asexual. Its hard to act sexual when youve always been the friend. "make a move, dun be scared" "flirt with her" doesnt mean anything to you... you dont know what that is.

If i try to be sexual, its like im trying to do something im not used to doing so that doesnt help my nervousness. its weird i come across as nervous even when i think im perfectly relaxed. With nervousness sometimes i think, even if i tried to do what I think is being sexual (cuz like mentioned b4 ive always been the just a friend) the girl will be like "eww, ok why dont we jbf, itll make it much easier for both of us" like if im supposed to like that deal while she goes out and ****s other guys. but whatever

whatevers stopping me is not excuse, its a reason. Im just asking if its nervousness. Ive always been surrounded by confident blacks and hispanics, who get girls and have no problems with that and have been ****ing since about 15. That doesnt help either. Certain behaviors i can cut out, but theres always gonna be certain amount of uneasyness, unrelaxedness, on edgeness, when im talking to someone. Im just wondering is that **** gonna turn off majority of women.

 

[Phyzzle]

Heights, it will just take work. It's not permanent; at least it wasn't for me.

Just Act like you are sexual. It will be hard and you will feel unnatural.

But it FEELS hard and unnatural to drive, at first. After you do it a thousand times, it isn't.

You believe social skills are different, and you'll never learn them like you learned driving. You are wrong.

 

[Rex Man]

Heights, I was actually talking to others outside our 'family' that doesn't have to deal with that. But yeah, there are certain situations that are easy for others but I still have a real difficult time right.

What I've learned that works for me is leveling the playing field. In small groups and 1 on 1 I'm damn good, but in large groups, I suck. So at say, a party, I won't be in middle of a room filled to the brink w/ people, but on a couch or something w/ just a few. It also gives me more of a reason to isolate quickly.


PLI

 

[KoalaKing]

I was diagnosed with Autism and a Personality Disorder as a young child, as the result of this I also felt like a social outcast from the age of about 3 until I was well into my 30's.

I was always miserable and depressed as a young child as other kids and adults as well thought I was weird, but it got much worse when I began to desire the prettier girls during my high school years.

Everyone would say I was nervous even when I wasn't, as no pretty girls desired to be with me, I became an extremely violent young man, that lived the life of a street drunk, eating at soup kitchens, sleeping in parks, hostels for the homeless, as well as my being commited to three different psychiatric hospitals on six different ocassions.

At the age of 34 I began to change my life, it wasn't easy, but it had to be done.

I began to look at my weaknesses and work on changing them, I began reading and listening to different selp help materials, I began to eat properly, go to the gym to keep my body fit and strong, I bought stylish new clothes and began to study for academic qualifications in the business field.

All of these things helped, but I still more importantly had to develop a completely new personality before I could allure any hot babes.

I began to do affirmations, I retrained my voice to speak in a much more confident powerful and deeper tone, I then had to install within me the King or the Prize type persona and body language that all of the guys who allure the majority of the hottest babes have.

I had to get rid of that nervous loser wussism type persona that guys who have Autism naturally have built within them, it took time, but I eventually got rid of it.

Now I am 38 and have a HB9 Wife who is 21, I am extremely happy with my life these days, but it takes a lot of hard work to get to this point, you just have to reshape your entire personality into that of an extremely confident one, or else the pretty girls will always only ever place you in the just be friends catagory, it isn't their faults, it is just the way that they are. :yes: