"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Asking her out

E

ezekiel25.17

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I want to ask a girl (HB 9) out but I don't have the confidence to talk to her. The girl is definately interested because I'm getting IOIs all over the place but I'm afraid she will reject me once she knows I'm interested.

Also, we only see each other for a few minutes each day so there is not really any opertunity to make a connection. Given this, I was thinking my best course of action was to give her a piece of paper with my number on it and just write 'Give me a call'. I believe this could work because she is already interested. However, I do worry that 'Give me a call' is not challenging enough and she will lose attraction for me.

The more challenging alternatives I'm considering are: 'You seem quite nice - give me a call' and the most challenging of all 'Beggars can't be choosers'!

Personally, I'm drawn to 'Beggars can't be chooser' because its the least wussy but I fear it might be too much and could spoil the attraction. What do you guys think is the best of these?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Bewildered Soliloquy

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I don't think leaving the ball in her park like that is your best bet. Sure, it may work, but do you really want to be that guy who spends his time anxiously awaiting a phone call he might never get? If she's giving IOIs like you say she is, just put a smile on your face, get in there, make her laugh and get the #.
 
S

Sir Shinra

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If you know she's already interested, then what's the big deal in asking her out? Don't make a big deal out of it, because it's not!

Your post here seems kinda self-contradictory. You are getting IOIs from her and you know that she is interested, but for some reason you think that if SHE knows that YOU are interested, she will change her mind? It's fine if she knows you are interested. She already knows you are interested, so why try to hide it? As long as you don't come off as desperate or needy, you'll be fine.

Asking a woman out is not a big deal. Do it enough times and you'll come to realize that (I'm doing Week 5 of bootcamp now, the 'getting a date' part... it's all pretty much clockwork. Too bad my organizational skills are ****. Need to work on that.)

If she percieves you're making a big thing out of it, she's more likely to declane/flake. So make it seem casual, because it is.

Definitely get her number. Don't rely on her to call you, because she won't. Two out of the last three women I left my number with were giving me great IOIs. One looked like she was ready to make out with me on the spot... have yet to hear from any of them.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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