"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Asking a woman out at work

sesshoDevrim

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Personally I have no idea going about asking a woman out from work specially when the two of us have never met before. I don't magically pass by her walking through the hallways (btw the building I work at is stupid huge). I don't know anything about her or know anyone who knows her. Which means that I can't find a reason to say what's up to her. Just curious what I should do to actually approach this chick, and move towards taking her out.

Would just a "Hey my name is ______ from _______" work or what?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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sodbuster

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Unless it's a HUGE company with THOUSANDS of workers,don't DO it. Ever had it not work out with a girl and had her turn vindictive?..... so, want to be charged with harassment?, have her talk about you and wreck your reputation in the corporation?, get yourself fired for breaking company policy?

there are reasons you don't "dip your pen in the company ink","sh1t where you eat" or whatever other statement you'd like to use
 

FieldReportGuy7

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Agree with Sodbuster. Don't freakin do it Brotha you will get your ass in hot water when things dont turn out well.

Currently one of my young hot supervisor is into me and giving me flirting signals, will I flirt back? Yes. Will I hit it? Absalutely not.

My job is my priority and with the current state of the economy, I'm taking no chances.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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sodbuster

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Not saying you CAN'T,but you need to KNOW company policy on dating;need to KNOW if the chain of command leaves you vulnerable to a harassment charge; KNOW the girl won't go psycho on you;KNOW how PC your company/field is; and KNOW you can get another job. Some people actually make it through the mine field.... but don't walk in unaware of the dangers.

So is she going to be the future mother of your children? Another notch on your bed?In the worst case scenario... is her azz worth losing your job over? Do some SERIOUS cost/benefit analysis on this.
 

runner83

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sodbuster raises some good points, and you need to take them into consideration.

Make sure you understand the risk that you may lose your job and/or your workdays may become a living hell if things don't work out (as they are likely to longer term).

Having said that, I was involved with 3 women where I worked over the last couple of years and without any negative fall out.

Girl 1 was 5 years old than me, and married. I may have teased her a bit in the office, and then she e-mailed me first. It escalated into her kissing me in a lift, make out in a place near to the office, then one day she came to my place after work. :whistle:

Lasted for a few months as a f/b arrangement [no one else ever knew about it as far as I know]


Girl 2 was younger in my current office. She started e-mailing me
first and over a few weeks I escalated over several weeks by e-mail / text.

One night of heavy make out (then she said next time we met up her shirt would be staying on) then 2 days later she tracked me down and fvcked me [my mates at work knew about it, since she found me that night when I was with my friends, and spread from there].


Girl 3 was also in my current office. She e-mailed me first, I got her number after 1 day, then 2 days since I knew she was into me big time, I fvcked her in the sick room in the basement at work.

Lasted a few months, then issues with how insecure she was (she found out about girl 2) and other stuff came out and it ended [this one became almost common knowledge in the office; luckily no one who gave a damn about using it against me found out :rockon:]


Common points for me:


- The girl has to show some interest beforehand, otherwise you are asking for a s!xual harassment case.

- When in doubt about their interest, slower escalation is better than too fast, since you know where they'll be every day.

- But once you know her interest, make a move.

- In all my cases, they were temps and I didn't directly work with them, so made things a lot less awkward since I didn't even need to see or speak to them afterwards.

- For me, I KNOW if worst came to worst, I could find another job. Make sure you take it into account.


In your case, my assessment as someone who has been there done that, is that you're wasting your time.
 
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