"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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asking a girl out at a supermarket?

SteR

Master Don Juan
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Hey guys,

There's a cute girl who works at a supermarket where I buy my lunch daily and I'm thinking of asking for her number. The only problem is I'm not exactly sure how to do it without coming across as a chump :).

I'm not entirely sure how she would respond either. I've caught her looking at me once or twice and she quickly looks away when I look at her.

I was thinking of just being quite upfront about it all and saying 'hey, I wouldn't usually do this but how'd you like to come out for a drink with me?'.

It's not like I can have a proper conversation with her because obviously she has to serve customers. How would you guys approach this?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Cod3r

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'hey, I wouldn't usually do this but how'd you like to come out for a drink with me?'.
Never apologize for speaking to a female, your "I wouldn't usually do this" is an apology and it makes you come across as whimpy and loserish...

I find it pathetic to just ask a girl out without knowing anything about them. You basically are saying, "I want to have sex with you" and you fail to even let the girl rationalize you might be interested in something else. She has not spoken to you so you can't be into her personality or her values or anything else, so right away she's guaging you physically. If she finds you 'hot' then you probably will be successful, but if she's not attracted its an instant crash and burn bro...

I'd recommend getting in her line next time you see her, make a quick little joke or something and get her laughing then get her name and then just exit. This builds a little mystery as she'll wonder when is the next time she'll see you and if that convo. had anything to do with you being attracted to her or are you just that type of guy ?? Muaha..

Also, I'd suggest asking her when she gets off on break so you can chill that exact day, no one has probably asked her out that way before. Spend about 30 minutes with quick high value chit-chat and that'll put you in excellent position for drinks later on bro...

PS
DO NOT ask her out for drinks first time out bro... that's stalkerish


-Cod3r
 

SteR

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yea I was kinda thinking the same as you tbh.. it's just quite hard to get a convo going when there are other people queueing. Anyway I'll see what I can do
 

Soprano

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u go there every day? well just start saying stuff other than "hi" and "bye" and establish rapport. nothin too long since im sure u dont wanna be standin around for an hour talkin n either does she. keep it short n sweet

like the dude up there ^ said dont be like "i normally wouldnty do this" that **** is WHAAAAAAAAAAAAACK. have fun if it aint fun then DONT DO IT. if ur doin somethin that is lame and u bomb then u feel 5x worse than if u do something that was fun and it happens 2 bomb. if u go there every day then u dont wanna do somethin that'll be embarassing if u bomb and have 2 go back for lunch tomorrow.
 

Delta

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cod3r,

every time we approach, the only thing that we're saying is "i want to fvck you!" (exclamation point optional)

you say that it's pathetic to apologize for approaching a girl and yet you would apologize for that last bit - THE REASON WE ARE APPROACHING IN THE FIRST PLACE! incongruous.

i agree that we shouldn't APPEAR to be saying just that- TO THEM (read: lie through your motherfvcking teeth) ... although most girls should understand the subtext if they're attractive and over a nominal age.

but come on... if it wasn't for the fact that we see them and want to fvck them, none of this other stuff is anything at all. we wouldn't care what they thought, what they said, how many homes they put up for habitat for humanity, how many kids they saved from a fire, blah blah motherfvcking blah.

we approach to fvck. make no mistake.

delta
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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