"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Asked her out too casually?

NotAgain

Don Juan
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Thanks all, every little thought you guys have put have been great insight for me honestly!

So I asked her out and made it sound too casual as if it was 2 friends whom had not caught up in awhile. She said yes though. Anyway how can I fix this and show her that this is an actual date? Cheers.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Aaron B

Master Don Juan
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if its you and her one-on-one, its a date

feel free to playfully tease her about it not being a date, however

"this isn't a date" is a card that either of you can play. if you play it first, now she is reacting to you. if you leave it for her to play, now you are reacting to her

this also helps show that you aren't needy and desperate and dependent on the outcome. additionally, while she suspects you like her, she isn't quite sure yet
 

F!DELITY

Don Juan
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No!!!

state the intent of the "date" to her. But do it once you meet her in person.

Say something fun like "I asked to hang with you cos I do fancy you by the way!"

If delivered cheeky and fun, then it will go down a treat!
 

PapiChulo

Master Don Juan
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Canada, eh?
Aaron B said:
if its you and her one-on-one, its a date

feel free to playfully tease her about it not being a date, however

"this isn't a date" is a card that either of you can play. if you play it first, now she is reacting to you. if you leave it for her to play, now you are reacting to her

this also helps show that you aren't needy and desperate and dependent on the outcome. additionally, while she suspects you like her, she isn't quite sure yet
Do what he says. You can NEVER be too casual, as being all serious usually drives women away. Please, dont confuse being direct with being too serious. Whatever the outcome, it doesnt mean that fun has to stop. Some older women and the uninterested types do require you to state that it is in fact a date. It also depends on what you have been doing with her until this moment, e.i. being sexual. The fact is that if she likes you romantically she will automatically treat it like a date.
 
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