Asked a girl out, now what.

[randomshinichi]

So I met a girl on the bus. I asked her if she was new to the city we were in, because she kept looking out of the window. She was very proactive in the conversation, never letting me ask my questions. I took that as a sign of interest and asked for her number.

I must admit, the thrill of anticipating what she would say in the next second could get addictive.

In any case, I got the number. Problem is, she won't be in the city for a couple weeks because it's Christmas, she's off to her hometown. So what's a guy to do to make her remember that she met me on the bus a couple weeks ago? Calling her during this time might come off as needy and intruding on her privacy, but then I do run the risk of calling her next year and hearing "who is this? gtfo my phone".

And I'll game others too, of course.

 

[Phat]

Game other girls , tomorrow is not guaranteed.

 

[Die Hard]

It's just your fear messing with you... How often do you think she's sitting in the bus and some unknown guy asks her for her number? I think she'll definitely remember that this happened, dude (unless she's a huge HB10 slut who gets hit on 10x a day). You're just afraid that the iron will no longer be hot after two weeks and you won't be able to strike it anymore at that point. But it might as well be the other way around: Since she seemed to like you as much as you liked her, it's quite probable that she's enthusiastically anticipating the day you will call and will be very happy when she finally gets the call .

Anyway, if your fear becomes too strong and you feel like you have to "keep the iron hot", you can always send her a text message, right? "Hey, it's the guy from the bus . Just wanted to wish you happy holidays and show you that I haven't forgotten about you! ) Or whatever you wanna say...

 

[AAAgent]

send her a text around christmas time. make it short basically saying something like merry christmas as well as reminding her of your encounter with each other. don't talk to her until she get's back. don't call and don't become her bff through texting.

 

[shyguy32]

Perfect time work on your Text Message game! I got a bar tenders phone number last sunday...not one phone conversation! Anyway we hung out a couple hours on thursday, I meet her after work on friday night and I bang her after a few hours of hanging with her. Yet I had really no real conversation with her other than teasing her through text and teasing her in person. It's all in the flirting the touching(kino).

And I don't understand half of you guys, I don't think I've been on a "date" in 5 years. I always "hang out" with women I meet never take them on a "date". Girlfriends get dates...before they're my gf we just hang out. Keeps your frame of mind where it needs to be and it keeps theirs where it needs to be. A "date" puts way too much un-needed pressure on the situation.

 

[shyguy32]

Oh I have to clarify text game vs in person game or phone game. You cannot be one person during text messages and the total opposite in person or on the phone. Your phone/text personality has to match your in person personality or the girl is history. But see I think it's so much easier to be the ****y/funny guy when you've already teased her and played with her during text. She's not going to get offended when you're that way in person.

 

[Die Hard]

Shyguy, could you expand some more on the difference between 'hanging out' and 'dating'? What exactly is the difference, according to you?

 

[shyguy32]

My thoughts are that when you call it a date, your putting expectations on the girl and she's putting expectations on YOU. What does that do? That adds to the already stressful situation, especially you newer guys.

So in my experiences if you just say hey do you want to go hang out, theres this really cool whatever going on. Or just a I'm going to grab some coffee you want to meet up with me, or a million other things. But when you say "Oh I would love to take you out to dinner sometime" thats way to effing stressful for me and her. So keep it casual, keep it fun. I think when your at a dinner and your sitting across from each other it's more like an interview instead of a "date". So if you do something like coffee at the mall while your looking for a shirt you can walk and talk and never have to worry about it seeming like an interview.

Just my opinion guys and maybe, just maybe it might make it easier for you to ask that girl to go do something with you, instead of asking her on a "date".


Really all it is to me is a frame of mind thing, like I said earlier here hanging out puts no expectations on the situation. Going on a date does...IMO!! It's about getting your mind straight right?

 

[randomshinichi]

Hey thanks for the tips guys. Yeah, I know about the not asking for a date part. I once met a girl I met from a year before, she still remembered me, and I invited her to have coffee at Starbucks as we walked. Remember, we hadn't talked in almost a year. It worked out very well.

Oh yeah, and I learned this the hard way from an earlier incidient, but because I suggested we go to Starbucks, I insisted on paying.

 

[Proselytiser]

Anyway, if your fear becomes too strong and you feel like you have to "keep the iron hot", you can always send her a text message, right? "Hey, it's the guy from the bus . Just wanted to wish you happy holidays and show you that I haven't forgotten about you! ) Or whatever you wanna say...

Best case that will have no effect, worst (and more probable) it will ruin all chances. Don't try it. Don't call or text unless to set a meeting