"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Ask her out, you never know

DJDamage

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Watch this clip:
http://seneca.rsad.edu/animations/PassingMoments.html

As you can see our poor clueless hero never even bothered to start a conversation with the attractive woman on the train because he was too afraid of what she will say or how she will judge him. He was too buzy thinking that she will reject him because he was not up to her standerds. He ends up sitting and fantasizing about what could have been, instead of doing something about it.

When he finally snapped back into reality the woman left the train. The expression on her face was like most women you see in a bar, checking them out from a distance and don't approach " Why didn't he approach me"? they all think. Our clueless hero ends up being bitter and mad at himself for not doing something about it .

The bottom line is that you are getting rejected each time you don't do an approach. Try making a small conversation, if you don't get a positive reaction after the first two sentences at least you know that she wasn't intrested. Always believe in yourself and don't assume anything.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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DJDamage

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Don't assume anything negative. Positive assumptions.
I would have to say again don't assume anything. If you assume that you will go and talk to some HB and everything will be great and it turns out it didn't - you will be worse off then before.

Positive affirmation is the key here. The reason we are so afraid is because we get negative affirmation from our memory that we got rejected somewhere in our past and therefore we are more likely to get rejected in the present and the future.

Taking small steps like a DJ Bootcamp to slowly be comfertable smiling and talking to women is the key here. The more you do it the better you will get.
 

Jon E

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Originally posted by DJDamage
The expression on her face was like most women you see in a bar, checking them out from a distance and don't approach " Why didn't he approach me"?
Excellent post DJDamage,

I think a lot of you would be surprised at how what happened in that video is more often the rule, instead of the exception. There are women everywhere that are dying for men to approach them.

Just go up to them and say "Hi". It wont kill you, I promise.
 

Virtú

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I've always wondered why women seem stuck with interest signals that are too subtle for most men to pick up on, or else they don't give any signals at all.

Does their desire to avoid being seen as a slut really extend that far beyond sex?
 
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“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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DJDamage

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I've always wondered why women seem stuck with interest signals that are too subtle for most men to pick up on, or else they don't give any signals at all.

Does their desire to avoid being seen as a slut really extend that far beyond sex?
Women do give signals but they are subtle to some extent. Its up to the guy to do the approach and prove himself worthy to fvck her.

In nature when a female is in heat she send signals for males to come and compete for her and when she is satisfied with his worthiness, she will let him fvck her. Its nature cruel way to ensure that the female mates with the strongest/fittest/smartest/good looking male she can find in order for the future generation will be given a better chance in survival. She has to ensure that the offsprings will posses quality of survival and also have looks to attract very feminine/fit/good looking females on his own some day.

A woman cannot tell if a guy is AFC if she is the one that tries to hit on him. Its a better strategy of letting the guys hit on her and accept the advances of the winner and not the loser. That is why sh1t test exist and that is why when you are AFC its much harder to find a steady loving HB to fvck because they know they can do better.
 

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I guess it surprises me that all the sh!t a woman puts a man through doesn't diminish her in his eyes.

If a woman is a b!tch, then it really doesn't matter to me how hot she is; she can go crying home to her vibrator for all I care.
 
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DJDamage

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I guess it surprises me that all the sh!t a woman puts a man through doesn't diminish her in his eyes.
Its a catch 22. The more Masculine and confident a guy is the less likely she will put man through sh1t test and therefore she would not be diminished in his eyes because if she starts giving him too many sh1t test, the man can always walk away and get together with another HB and the woman knows that!

The less masculine and confident a guy becomes the more sh1t test he would get (also the more feminine the women the more she has reasons to give him a sh1t test ) and because he doesn't have the balls to tell her to stop and he doesn't have any other options, she knows that she has him and can do no wrong. As well because he cannot do any better he would put up with her bad behaviour and thus the cycle continues.
 

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When Nature strengthens the strong and weakens the weak, it's no wonder that AFC-dom is so difficult to break out of.

Not only are you swimming against the current, but you're probably also in the wrong river.
 
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