I asked a girl to come out kayaking with me (not a bad date idea) and she agreed. Then I find out she invited her sister and her friend to tag along. I just met this girl about a week ago, so maybe she's just not comfortable enough yet to hang out us 2 by ourselves, or maybe she's just not interested. What do you guys think?
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
ask her on a date, she invites her sister and friend. now what?
- Thread starter duke104
- Start date
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Maximus Rex
Banned
I would say leave. That's what Leykis would recommend, but since I've read and become versed in seduction material, now I would say treat this the same way, you treat approaching a target in a group setting. Use group theory, negs, jealousy plotlines, and social proof. Also use these chicks to open other sets.
If this had happened to me, I would have told her that "I invited you, not your friends."
It's kind of rude on her part to just have these people tag along.
I would tell them not to come. You definitely wont be getting any from this girl from this date, and most likely not for future ones.
I wouldn't say "next" her right away, but maybe ask her on one more date, this time ALONE and see what happens.
It's kind of rude on her part to just have these people tag along.
I would tell them not to come. You definitely wont be getting any from this girl from this date, and most likely not for future ones.
I wouldn't say "next" her right away, but maybe ask her on one more date, this time ALONE and see what happens.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
ARrocket
Master Don Juan
I'll go against the grain and pretty much disagree with all the advice given in this thread.
You asked her to go KAYAKING. On a FIRST "date." In fact, that doesn't even sound like a date...sounds like a fun time, but doesn't sound intimate at all. Which is PROBABLY why she assumed it would be alright to invite people along.
YES, it was a RUDE move on her part to invite people along without consulting you first, but as far as the seduction part of this is concerned, I don't think it's a huge red flag.
I mean, if somebody invited me to go skydiving with them, and I knew another person who had been dying to go skydiving, I'd think to invite them along.
IMO a FIRST date should be something FAR more casual, FAR more intimate, and FAR LESS time consuming.
So you can go kayaking if you want, or you can cancel. IF you think you have enough game to game her somewhat in a group setting, go for it. Maybe afterward you can get her back to your place, maybe not. But the next time you see her, there HAS to be isolation. Ya dig?
You asked her to go KAYAKING. On a FIRST "date." In fact, that doesn't even sound like a date...sounds like a fun time, but doesn't sound intimate at all. Which is PROBABLY why she assumed it would be alright to invite people along.
YES, it was a RUDE move on her part to invite people along without consulting you first, but as far as the seduction part of this is concerned, I don't think it's a huge red flag.
I mean, if somebody invited me to go skydiving with them, and I knew another person who had been dying to go skydiving, I'd think to invite them along.
IMO a FIRST date should be something FAR more casual, FAR more intimate, and FAR LESS time consuming.
So you can go kayaking if you want, or you can cancel. IF you think you have enough game to game her somewhat in a group setting, go for it. Maybe afterward you can get her back to your place, maybe not. But the next time you see her, there HAS to be isolation. Ya dig?
You can do whatever you want, just think of it as a win-win situation.
If you tell her you only invited her, not her friends, your intentions will be more clear. If she finds this rude or chooses not to come at all then, you've saved yourself a good amount of time and money.
If you don't say anything, just treat her and her friends as a group. It'll be even easier for you because you'll already have a bit of social proof since she has already agreed to hang out with you. You can also use the other girls to open up new opportunities.
If you tell her you only invited her, not her friends, your intentions will be more clear. If she finds this rude or chooses not to come at all then, you've saved yourself a good amount of time and money.
If you don't say anything, just treat her and her friends as a group. It'll be even easier for you because you'll already have a bit of social proof since she has already agreed to hang out with you. You can also use the other girls to open up new opportunities.