Article: Men prefer being solo over a bad marriage: study

[DJDamage]

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20080602/lf_nm_life/books_bachelors_dc

Weisman said his research blew away any idea that single men were unhappy.

"A compelling issue was how many of them had found contentment in a never-married life," he said. "They had created lives full of careers, friends and ambitions. It was not like they walk around all day worried about not being married."

I wouldn't believed that this article have been posted on the main page of yahoo, until I read the full article to the end:

For him, researching the book made him also look at himself -- and he ended up living with a girlfriend for the first time.

"Now we're looking at getting married. As I researched the book I found I was looking at men 10 years older than me and it was like looking into the future.
If I didn't change, nothing would," he said.

This article ended up boasting the matriarchy instead of vilifying it. I bet most women hated this article until they read the ending where they boast to themsleves " oh goody this man finally smarten up and realised the only way to true happiness is marriage".

 

[PeeGee]

I wrote a more touchy feely response elsewhere, but ultimately the point in the article that showed that men who were successful financially were weary of failure makes perfect sense. However and regardless you ought to be able to discern whether your woman is quality or not.

The other concerns such as whether a man can provide for a female are silly. Many people get married or have children without the financial means to adequately function (or just barely enough so that they are chained to their jobs to succeed at it).

As for the advice telling women to wait, I am thinking that women do not have the time / resources to 'wait' for a good man. There are cases like a woman being the boyfriend of a man in pre-med, even though the schooling time is quite a long period, because the payoff is worth it in the end. However I would be shocked if a woman would stay with the pre-med kid over a practicing doctor.

Weisman said his research blew away any idea that single men were unhappy.

God forbid we have to be unhappy just because we're single. That tends to be a lonely man / female attribute to me.

 

[jophil28]

...that men who were successful financially were weary of failure makes perfect sense.

.

.." weary of failure .."... did you mean to type " ... WARY of failure.." ??

 

[PeeGee]

.." weary of failure .."... did you mean to type " ... WARY of failure.." ??

Yes. Maybe I'm just weary.

 

[LeftyLoosey]

I don't get the conclusion at all. "If I didn't change, nothing would."

What the heck does that mean? Change what? Lower his standards and get married to someone he wasn't considering before? That's BRILLIANT.

Good job buddy, I'm sure your new wife will enjoy splitting half the royalties of your book with you.

I also will not settle for anything less than perfection, and by perfection I mean someone I can relate to with 100% honesty and still be respected and adored, and vice-versa. Anything less than perfection will only lower my quality of life so why bother?

 

[Scaramouche]

Hey Guys,
Don't get carried away,this guys thinking is soo out of date,it belongs to an age where poverty,lack of technology and the sheer common sense in sharing created a real neccessity for a symbiotic relationship living together,dealing with this first,for most guys these days the reason they get stitched up is they find a good shag,get scared of sharing or losing it and want to tie both her and themselves down...silly thinking,based on insecurity,unless you feel a need to procreate,to sow your seed and take on the full disaster that marriage often becomes,or are incapable of fending properly for yourself,or are socially inept and lonely,then avoid it...This is before we look at involving the State in your private life,this can be a sad route indeed,if you want to feel the pain of a vengeful States Assagai,fair up your rectum,then go ahead,watch the things you have sacrificed blood sweat toil and tears for,torn from you by the politically correct morons who run our great Nations...Yes Lads they run it,but when they stuff up,who gets the Lee Enfield thrust into their hands,who gets pushed into the ****pit of a Spitfire,or hosed out of the rear end of a Lancaster ? We all know who it wont be,the Sociologists,the Judges and Counsellors,the tree hugging cat herders...No it will be"sort it out for us Jack"..Sorry guys,bit emotional...still the Mantra is Never let the Lady get her feet under the Table...

 

[LeftyLoosey]

This guy should conduct a survey of married men to determine how many marriages are actually happy. He should ask questions like "if you could go back and time and do it all over again, would you?" I bet we'd get a number in the vicinity of 80% of marriages are unhappy (since 50% already end up in divorce, I imagine at least 60% of the remainder are unhappy but stick it out for the kids, societal pressures, financial reasons, etc).

I was over at my best friend's house. He's Greek and both of his parents are very religious and from Greece (barely speak English). They've been married for 35 years and by the end of the day they had no qualms about telling me not to get married, and that marriage is not for "smart people."

 

[STR8UP]

This guy should conduct a survey of married men to determine how many marriages are actually happy. He should ask questions like "if you could go back and time and do it all over again, would you?" I bet we'd get a number in the vicinity of 80% of marriages are unhappy (since 50% already end up in divorce, I imagine at least 60% of the remainder are unhappy but stick it out for the kids, societal pressures, financial reasons, etc).

I've been saying this for ages now.

If you ONLY factor in the divorce rate (which you can stack the odds in your favor to an extent if you are smarter than the average bear) you are only looking at one side of the coin. Truth of the matter is there are many, MANY marriages that are merely held together by a thread.

If you're a good DJ chances of you marrying a woman who you will end up divorcing are lower. But even if you're a Man who handles his business and brings a lot to the table, I would say that no matter what you do you can't tip the odds in your favor (over 50%) that you will actually be able to maintain a happy, healthy relationship, till death do you part.