Arrogance?

[backbreaker]

Are you arrogant?

I went on a lunch date today with a lady friend of mine.. all went well, as expected. After a couple of drinks, we get to talking about each other and why we have been doding each other for the last x years blah blah blah.

Not saying I was Chasing her, but we talked 2 years ago, extremely breifly and it just went downhill from there. We saw each other out, she wouldn't talk to me, so I said **** it and moved on, assuming she wasn't interested.

So I tell her, I mean, let's be real, I wouldn't have talked to her in the first place if I wasn't attracted to her or If I didn't like her at all, but you know, at the same time, I'm not desperate and I am not chasing anyone.

So I ask her what Doesn't she like about me.

To my astonishment, she says she has always liked me, but I come off as arrogant and that I intimiated her to the point where she didn't think I thougth she was attractive, if that makes any sense.

You have to know me. Sure of myself? yes. Proud of myself? yes. Arrogant? no. In fact, I go out of my way not to be arrogant, I try not to talk about myself, etc.

It's funny, well two things are funny. First off, as I noticed today, arrogant people don't think they are arrogant. Secondly, I would rather be arrogant then to be chumpish, becuause as arrogant as I came off, we still slept together and I have another date setup with her early next week.

Are you arrogant? What is the difference between arrogance and confidence? Is arrogance even really that bad of a thing?

 

[DJ4Real]

Everyone has some form of arrogance in one way or another. For example, having self respect is a form of arrogance. Arrogance is why people have self respect. For instance, if you believe someone is treating you below your standard of "respect," your inner self respect will not allow you to tolerate that maltreatment because you believe that you are of higher value (superior) to that type of treatment. You are "better" than that. You are too proud to be treated below your expectations.

People who have arrogance to this degree (moderated arrogance) are more accepted because the arrogance that they possess is used in the form of general and or basic self esteem and self respect: things that people should have.

But on the other hand, those who are "arrogant" in the higher degree often make people feel inferior to them because of their overbearing pride. They have extremely high pride and self esteem, they use people as "objects of satisfation" to make themselves look superior; in their mind they are "too good for you."

People who are like this are generally termed as "arrogant" or "big headed;" they are not as accepted because their arrogance is malicious and out of control (unmoderated).


The difference between arrogance and confidence is: Arrogance has to do with how one views his or herself and how he or she ranks his or herself amoungst "those." Arrogance also has to do with the level of self esteem and pride one has.

Confidence has to do with one having inner strength, and one being self assured themself: "knowing."

Having arrogance is a good thing, becoming arrogant is a bad thing.

 

[Phyzzle]

I come off as arrogant and I intimiated her

Intimidated? What a bunch of crap.

Has this girl EVER tried to date an amazing guy who intimidated her?

"Well, umm, yeah, but that was DIFFERENT!"

he didn't think I thougth she was attractive

Now there's the crux. You didn't make your attraction blatantly obvious. Girls aren't that sharp: you gotta look deep into her eyes and smile, or she could assume you aren't into her.

 

[insanity]

i walk into a place, like i'm the best looking guy on the planet(arrogance) and my woman teases me about it(flirting). i've benefited from girls telling me that i'm full of myself. soon enough they were full of me haha. confidence or arrogance....it's all how you carry yourself. when they comment on it say "you love it"

 

[Sean O]

Maybe it just has something to do with the way you carry yourself? Something similar to what you're describing happened to me about a month ago. I was chilling with my friend Tom and he told me that when he first met me, he thought I was really uptight... but that was before he had even spoken to me. Then he said that immediately after speaking with me, he realized that I'm actually a very laid-back and fun-loving guy. I asked him what it was about me that said "uptight" to him, and he said it was because I "have extremely good posture and walk like a soldier". That was a real eye-opener for me; I hadn't realized how much small things like that can influence how others perceive you. Since then, I've tried to get myself into the habit of walking a little more casually. Semi-strutting, you could say, although I have no intention of doing the pimp-swagger .

 

[flexion_]

Confident people are sure of themselves and people can sense it. Usually this comes from experience.

Arrogant people are sure of themselves and tell everyone. Usually this comes out of insecurity.

 

[rsxtreme]

its nice to be confident and arrogant sometimes. if it makes anyone feel better about themselves

 

[Blue Phoenix]

Are you arrogant?

First off, as I noticed today, arrogant people don't think they are arrogant. Secondly, I would rather be arrogant then to be chumpish, becuause as arrogant as I came off.

Wow, that´s exactly how I feel. I don´t think I am arrogant but sometimes people imply I am.

At the university today when I was opening the door to go out of a room, I noticed a blonde girl going towards the same door. I noticed she was going to enter the room so I held the door to her. Fortunately, she said thanks to me.

I don´t bother being courteous sometimes, but don´t expect me to compliment a girl all the time.

 

[Blue Phoenix]

Arrogant people are sure of themselves and tell everyone.

Not really. Those are the ones who brag all the time. There´s another type of arrogance. Just pay attention to how a person carry himself and you will know what I am talking about.

Have you ever noticed some people who walk with their head up as if they were better than you? That´s called body language.